This week, the Hoes thought that they found one of TJ’s best-kept secrets in the refrigerated smoothies. But some secrets should never be told. They’re also blending in Evie’s new rap name, Katie’s fear of jacked-up babies, and the love story between bananas and nuts. 

In the cart: 

• Organic Coconut Smoothie
• Banana & Almond Butter Protein Smoothie
• Vanilla Almond Spiced Chai Protein Smoothie
• Chocolate Almond Protein Smoothie

Can you believe i?, The Hoes are cooking! Ok technically, they’re just warming up frozen pizzas but the bar is extremely low these Hoes and apparently even lower for some of these Trader Joes pies.

In the cart:
Tarte au Brie et aux Tomates

Tarte d'Alsace with Ham, Onions, and Gruyere

Burrata, Prosciutto and Arugula Flatbread

BBQ Chicken Pizza

This week, the Hoes are shaking this up with a few of Trader Joe's newer pre-made pasta salads. After removing the sauce packets from the tiny plastic containers, they also fit in the concept for a new crime-fighting pasta show for kids, why Katie could never commit a crime, and the Cucumber Wetness Spectrum.

In the cart:

• Lemon Basil Pasta Salad
• Chickpea Kale And Crispy Red Rice Salad
• Peanut Udon Noodle Salad
• Korean Style Bibim-Guksu

It was 91 degrees in February and the Hoes are coping with some new frozen favorites from Trader Joe’s. If you love instant affagato, pistachio having its moment, super-sized macrons, and unpacking Katie’s pigeon trauma, then you’re in for a treat, Hoes.

In the cart:

2 Affogatos Vanilla Non-Dairy Frozen Desserts
Macaron Ice Cream Sandwiches

Italian Pistachio & Fior di Latte Gelato Style Frozen Dessert

Calamansi & Mango Sorbet

This week, the Hoes are asking an age-old question: Is this a cake you can eat in your car? Not even childhood trauma is going to keep them from getting an answer as Katie and Evie try Trader Joe's mini sheet cakes for the first time. They're also mixing in getting cookie samples from Jeff(?), eating cake as an act of rebellion, and casting these cakes as bakers on the Great British Bake Off.

In the cart: 

• Toasted Coconut Mini Sheet Cake
• Chantilly Cream Vanilla Bean Mini Sheet Cake
• Dark Chocolate Mini Sheet Cake

• ⁃ Cookies and Cream Mini Sheet Cake

The Hoes are hitting up the snack aisle and finding their new stripper names in the process. From curried potato chips to yeasty popcorn, it's a full-flavored episode that'll have you pondering deep thoughts like, "Do I look like my dog?" and "How do you pronounce 'Piquant?"

In the cart:
Sweet Onion Style Pretzel Twists
Thai Style Yellow Curry Flavored Potato Chips
Hot Honey Popcorn
Piquant Popcorn

This week, the Hoes fight through some technical issues to dip into the deep end of Trader Joe's dips. Katie and Evie also scoop up garlic blindness, a severe lack of poker face, and their new pitch for an HGTV show, Dippin' and Flippin'.

In the cart:

• Roasted Tomato Labneh Dip 
• Caesar Salad Dip 
• Garlic Spread Dip 
• Vegan Tzatziki Dip 
• Almond Chipotle Dip 

Happy Valentine’s and Galentine’s Day to all who celebrate! The Hoes are back with some sweet favorites and some new discoveries. Will they be love at first bite or taste like bitter disappointment? Did we even love pink before Victoria Secret brainwashed us? And when will Trader Joe’s start selling condoms?

In the cart:
Sweet Heart Bath Fizzer

Italian Artisan Heart Shaped Pasta

Chocolate & Peanut Butter Lover's Nut Mix
Milk Chocolate Covered Marshmallow Hearts

Dark Chocolate Caramel Hearts
Jelly Bean Hearts

Soft and Chewy Gummy Candy in X's & O's

Strawberry Yogurt Flavored Coated Almonds

This week, the Hoes are prepping for the upcoming Bad Bunny concert, surrounded by sports, with some game day faves. They're pairing these snacks with getting roasted by AI, some humbling pronunciations, and accepting their true selves as Crab Rangoon Girls.

In the cart: 

• Chicken Uncured Bacon Ranch Dip
• Buffalo Blue Unexpected Cheddar Cheese Spread 
• Jalapeño and Cream Cheese Crispy Wontons

• Mac and Cheese Bites

The Hoes are back with some bubbly biome boosting sodas. Will they even learn the difference pre and probiotic? Who can say! But one thing's for sure, Trader Joe's is jumping on that gut health train. They also crack into Coke's medicinal past, spitting in the ocean, and our dream sponsor, Metamucil.

In the cart:
Strawberry Vanilla Prebiotic Soda
Cherry Cola Prebiotic Soda
Ginger Lemon Probiotic Sparkling Beverage

Rounding out the return of the Hoes, Katie and Evie share Part 3 of the items they've been dying to review over the last 3 years! Also on the table are Katie's questionable cottage cheese choices, Evie's dip obsession, and the need for Everything But The Bagel bath bombs.

In the cart:
Ranch Cottage Cheese Dip

Unexpected Cheddar Cheese Spread

Apple Chip Duo

Sweet Cannoli Dip