To own a boat is the sea-lover's dream. To release a boat into the wild is the boat's dream. It may hurt at first. It may feel like a rabbit kicked you in the face. But you need to let the boat be it's own... boat. Farewell Sharkproof! To infinity and beyond and also this meeting. TALKING POINTS: Rabbit Kicks Flea Circuses Mom's New Pager Million Dollar Purchase

Holes. Man, where do I start? Good for Will? Check. Good for trapping rats? Yup. Good for exclaiming to police officers when you're about to enter their town and rob a bank? It'd be against the law to not do that. Shoot why holes seem to so incredible Shia Labeouf made a whole movie about them!

TALKING POINTS:

Shipt Exclamations

No Mask, No Smiles

Human Mouse Trap

100 Mile Garage Sale

Grab your Bean Supreme and let us all collectively scream into our iPhones about how we desperately need a red ball or shower onions! The power is in your folks! Today's episode really teaches you how to take control of your life and also how to re-create a very nostalgic piece of a Nickelodeon obstacle course.

TALKING POINTS:

Benefits of Coffee

Tricking the FBI into free stuff

Cardboard Aggro Crag

Tarot Card Breakup

DISCLAIMER** Please never do eye exercises while behind the wheel of a moving vehicle. People always talk about "don't drink and drive" and "don't text and drive". Not enough people mention how hard it is to drive when you're physically forcing exercise upon your eyes. Also, guys, lemme tell ya. You've never SEEN a meatloaf like the Beastloaf. The Grinch would look at his Roast Beast and think to himself "wow, I really pulled the short straw here, huh?"

TALKING POINTS:

Beastloaf

Eye Exercises

Matching Butt Tattoos

Forcing Bread Growth

Have you ever been magnetically pulled into a building at great speeds because you forgot you built it out of complete metal years ago? Ever thought about putting hot pockets ON a bigger pizza? You're so in the right place.

TALKING POINTS:

Walking Up Walls

Practice Holding Babies

My Bad Stalker

New Pizza Topping

Guys. I promise we'll eventually learn to turn the audio in our headphones down to get rid of that sweet juicy echo. But, until then, try to guess some laws that really shouldn't exist. Except for one, in the title, that kind of exists everywhere and really isn't creative at all. I mean AT ALL. Come on, Utah.

TALKING POINTS:

Awful Laws #1

Carving an A in the moon

Do's and Don'ts of starting a podcast

Heavens to Etsy

Sleeping Sitting Upright

Cheap proposal suggestions

Will is in North Carolina this week, so here’s a compilation of legal advice style questions we’ve had over previous episodes! In case it’s not clear, it’s definitely not real legal advice so please don’t walk through airports naked or think you can get away with murder. Both are very bad. Please don’t do either of them. Just listen and laugh.

TALKING POINTS:

Trespassed from Jail (EP. 3)

Wedding Jailers (EP. 5)

Driver’s Test w/ XBOX Controller (EP. 5)

No Clothes, No Problem (EP. 23)

Free Complimentary Murder (EP. 11)

Arrested for Being a Bad Actor (EP. 10)

Join us anybody and everybody in celebrating the two year anniversary of Save Your Bacon this New Year's Eve with some goofy awards, some genuine love, and some final questions to wrap up the year!

TALKING POINTS:

Ned Nog

The SYB Award Show

What To Do With All of Your Saved Bacon

Could You Hate Someone Who Adores You?

Did... Did Will just let Zane tell that dirty dishes question? All, sad news folks. I don't think a Glitzy Bear is a real thing. But, hey, prove me wrong. Hey, can I eat this fire stopping foam?

TALKING POINTS:

Sun Sized Human

Keep Hair or Go Bald

Is Fire Extinguisher Foam Edible

Can Bears Overdose on Cocaine

MERRY CHRIS MASSEY TIME YOU BEAUTIFUL HUMANS (yes, it's true, a joke we made before MBMBaM)! It's a holiday time which means it's a holiday episode full of questions, stories, and shoutouts!

TALKING POINTS:

Chris Massey Time

Ned Nog

Mistlefeet

Real-Life Mario

Storytime Simulator

Guys this one is weird. Will is a narcissist, Zane still believes in Santa, and Moose does NOT belong in house. That's it. That's the whole episode. No middle stuff, no nothin'. Enjoy a very different spice thrown in at the end of the year before the Christmas episode. Also, thank you again Devon Werkheiser for the beautiful advice.