Julian is a microwave now.

The Science:

Whole Brain Emulation: A Roadmap (2008)

Mind Uploading (Wikipedia)

It was evening now, but the night sky had been swallowed by abyssal darkness. The parking lot was almost completely empty. Abandoned, they thought, though they quickly banished this from their minds. The air felt thick. Unnatural. 

They stood in silence, blinking, as dread flooded into their veins, freezing their blood. Unconsciously they began to hold their breath.

There was a sharp buzzing and then a single street lamp flickered to life. They fixed their eyes on the glow and allowed themselves to breathe as if sight alone would save them.

Then, a hulking shadow emerged into the sickly, sputtering pool of light. Was he...was it...grinning?

Good value, that poem.

Ever wonder what happened to Brad and Julian after they grappling hooked onto that helicopter in episode 9? No? Well, too bad. Behold!

The smoldering wreckage of Chicago, or at least Brad's house.  

Julian's arboreal prison.

Two skeletons. 

A crow.

Clubhouse rules.

SALAD rises from the ashes - again - just in time for the spookiest time of the year. Is this episode scary? You better believe it. And if you don't believe it, give it a listen. Just don't come complaining to us when you no longer have pants because this episode scared them off of you. 

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SALAD is an improvised quasi-narrative podcast by Brad Garoon & Julian Freed-Brown with a bunch of lore for some reason.

Additional Music by

Kai Engel

Ross Budgen

After six full months of vacation off the grid, Brad returns to Dubai and discovers that things have changed at the Burj Khalifa. 

Meet June Goliath, CEO of MunchGoodCorp.Gov, and her assistant/enforcer Nico.

They understand youth culture.  

SALAD is an improvised semi-narrative podcast with a bunch of lore for some reason.

6 months after heartbreak (?) in Portgual, Brad returns to Dubai, but before he even sets foot in the Burj, something is wrong.

Maybe it's an IT issue.

Maybe.

Also

- Juuling

- Jeweling

- Julian

A six month vacation begins.

Serendipity in Azores. 

Ah, saudade. 

This episode picks up right where "10: Unpack" left off. Everyone has gotten sick together. Together. You're embarrassing me, and I'm embarrassed. This is embarrassing for everyone. Everything will be embarrassing for forever. For all of us. ...except Devin. Devin's so freakin' cool. I love Devin.

[REDACTED]'s COOL DIET 2.0 IS NOW HIRING

Hey! Are you a social media rock star or an IT ninja?

Are you young as hell?

Please send a resume and cover letter and/or head on over to the United Arab Emirates, then make your way up to floor 99 at the Burj Khalifa and introduce yourself to the CEO.

If you want to kiss him, go for it! He didn't read the fine print in his CEO contract, so he can't stop you! Experience with Python/C++ and SEO front-ends is a real plus.

You should be in peak physical and mental health and able to defend yourself from knives and everything else.

Proficiency with software is a plus, but not required. 

- - - - - - -

featuring GAVIN MORGAN as Gavin

JO HOCH as Jo

If you like the show, or me, or anything in the world, please SUBSCRIBE and LEAVE US A RATING! I love you!

Julian does a bad job with his mouth and brain. And he's a top skimmer. HOOKS...for crochet. HOOKED...on drugs. HOOKS...grappling.

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SALAD is an improvised podcast by Brad Garoon

with Julian Freed-Brown

Are you an ant queen or an elephant king? Are you a tsunami? Find out. Take the shot. Julian's Cool Diet v. 2.01 (Patch Notes) - Bugs - Bug fixes - Removed several bugs