Today’s episode is brought to you by Cozy Earth, makers of luxuriously soft bamboo sheets, blankets, and sleep essentials. Because your rest matters, mamas. Cozy Earth makes it easier to get the cozy, breathable sleep your body (and your little one) deserve. Use code HEHE at https://cozyearth.com/ for 20% off your order and treat yourself to the sleep you’ve been dreaming of.

In this episode of The Birth Lounge Podcast, HeHe sits down with OB-GYN Dr. Kirti Patel, host of The Gynarchy Podcast, to unpack how patriarchy has shaped women’s health, maternity care, and the way society talks about our bodies. With more than 25 years in obstetrics, Dr. Patel brings both experience and perspective to a conversation that challenges a lot of the norms we’ve been taught to accept.

They talk about what “gynae” really means, why Dr. Patel intentionally centers women’s voices, and how sexism has historically influenced medical training, leadership, and the care women receive. HeHe and Dr. Patel also explore the displacement of midwives, the slow shift toward more women in OB-GYN leadership, and the reality that women’s bodies are often treated like public property when it comes to birth control, abortion, and fertility.

The conversation dives into medical paternalism in labor and delivery, why informed consent is still a major issue in maternity care, and the very real physical, emotional, and career sacrifices that often come with pregnancy and motherhood. They also talk about the need for better support systems, the importance of community and “the village,” and why men sharing the mental load at home is part of the cultural shift families need.

Guest Bio:

Dr. Kirti Patel is a board-certified OB-GYN with over 25 years of experience and the host of The Gynarchy Podcast. Known for her bold, feminist perspective and evidence-based approach, she’s passionate about challenging outdated narratives in women’s health and calling out misinformation. Through her work, Dr. Patel blends science, advocacy, and real talk to help women better understand their bodies and feel more confident navigating their care.

www.thegynarchypodcast.com

The Gynarchy is a podcast at the intersection of women's health and feminism, hosted by ob/gyn Dr. Kirti Patel.

@thegynarchy on IG: https://www.instagram.com/thegynarchy

TikTok, and Bluesky, Find The Gynarchy on most podcast platforms and YouTube

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

In this episode of The Birth Lounge Podcast, HeHe sits down with Bronx-based doula and Bridge Directory founder Emilie Rodriguez for a real conversation about the uncomfortable truths inside U.S. maternity care. They talk about why the system is failing families and why avoiding hard conversations only keeps things the same.

HeHe and Emilie unpack the debate around doula certification, why some doulas intentionally remain uncertified, and how certification can sometimes become a tool for control within hospital systems. Emilie shares how Bridge Directory is working to create a more accessible pathway that allows doulas to work within institutions and bill Medicaid while still honoring traditional training, ancestral knowledge, and doula autonomy.

They also dive into the difference between true informed consent and the watered-down version often called “shared decision making,” the role racism plays in obstetrics, and why it’s unrealistic to expect doulas to fix systemic problems they didn’t create. This episode explores accountability, transparency in maternity outcomes, and why community, mentorship, and ongoing self-reflection are essential in doula work.

Guest Bio:

Emilie Rodriguez is a Black traditional birth and postpartum doula and medical anthropologist. She founded Ashe Birthing Services, a team of BIPOC doulas serving over 400 families a year in NYC, and co-founded The Bridge Directory, a platform of perinatal providers and professionals of color creating a new standard of maternal health. They are on a mission to heal the disparities in healthcare from within by training institutions and providers, redefining expectations in care, and closing the access gap. As an active Bronxite and reproductive justice advocate, Emilie is deeply passionate about her community and perinatal health. She is also a leading expert in policy-level change, particularly in advocating for doula pay-equity and the development of accessible doula qualifications and standardization, as doulas begin to accept insurance in New York City and New York State.

Connect with Emilie: 

https://www.ashebirthingservices.com/

https://www.thebridgedirectory.com/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/emilie-rodriguez11/

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

https://www.thebridgedirectory.com/

This episode is brought to you by Cozy Earth, makers of luxuriously soft bamboo sheets, blankets, and sleep essentials. Because your rest matters, mamas. Cozy Earth makes it easier to get the cozy, breathable sleep your body (and your little one) deserve. Use code HEHE at https://cozyearth.com/ for 20% off your order and treat yourself to the sleep you’ve been dreaming of.

In this episode of The Birth Lounge Podcast, HeHe continues the surrogacy series with Tiffany Jo Baker, a three-time surrogate who carried five babies, including two sets of twins. Tiffany shares how her faith first led her to surrogacy and walks through what the process actually looked like behind the scenes, from agency screening and psychological evaluations to matching with intended parents.

They talk honestly about IVF hormone protocols, embryo transfers that didn’t stick, experiencing pregnancy loss, and how consent and autonomy are navigated when it’s the surrogate’s body but not her baby. Tiffany also shares what conversations around selective reduction looked like, how relationships with intended parents evolved after birth, and why her surrogacy journeys ultimately ended in C-sections after previously having unmedicated vaginal births.

HeHe and Tiffany also unpack the practical side of surrogacy, including contracts, escrow, insurance, compensation, birth certificate logistics, and some of the biggest myths and misunderstandings surrounding the fertility industry.

Guest Bio:

Tiffany Jo Baker is a caffeinated mom of two young adult daughters, surrogate mom who has delivered five babies for three families dealing with infertility, proud dog-mom, and wife to an extreme outdoorsman. She is the podcast host of The Tiffany Jo Baker Podcast, author of the devotional Soul-Care for Go-Getters, speaker, and Holy Spirit-led strategist who uplifts the soul and success of women walking out their "why" at home, online and in the real world so they can get free, live full and birth their God-given dreams.

https://www.TiffanyJoBaker.com

https://www.tiffanyjobaker.com/tiffany-jo-baker-podcast

https://www.tiffanyjobaker.com/services 

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

In this episode of The Birth Lounge Podcast, HeHe sits down with Kallie Fell, executive director of the Center for Bioethics and Culture, for a thought-provoking conversation about the ethics of surrogacy.

Kallie shares why she believes modern surrogacy raises serious concerns about exploitation, commodification, and what she calls “fragmented motherhood,” where the roles of biological, gestational, and social mother are separated. Together, they explore questions about surrogate health risks, potential long-term impacts for children conceived through IVF, and the complicated legal landscape surrounding contracts, autonomy, and representation.

Throughout the conversation, HeHe reflects on how her own perspective shifted after becoming pregnant and emphasizes the importance of having open, respectful conversations about topics that are often considered taboo.

Guest Bio:

From the beginning, Kallie has been passionate about women’s health. After graduating with a Masters of Science degree in Animal Sciences with an emphasis on Reproductive Physiology and Molecular Biology and working in the Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology at Vanderbilt University Medical Center,  Kallie continued her education in nursing and has been a perinatal nurse for nearly a decade. Kallie has worked with the CBC since 2018, first as a volunteer writer, then as our staff Research Associate, and now as the Executive Director. In 2021, Kallie co-directed the CBC’s first documentary on “transgender medicine” titled Trans Mission: What’s the Rush to Reassign Gender? In 2022 Kallie co-wrote and co-produced The Detransition Diaries: Saving Our Sisters. Kallie hosted the popular podcast Venus Rising and is currently the Program Director for the Paul Ramsey Institute. Her latest film, The Lost Boys: Searching for Manhood and new book, co-authored with Jennifer Lahl, The Detransition Diaries (published by Ignatius Press) were both released in early 2024. 

About The Center for Bioethics and Culture: 

The Center for Bioethics and Culture Network (CBC) is an educational nonprofit addressing bioethical issues that most profoundly affect our humanity, especially issues that arise in the lives of the most vulnerable among us. We work through a variety of media platforms—documentary film, writing, speaking, interviews, social media, and more—to educate and inform members of the general public, thought leaders, lawmakers, and others on ethical issues in healthcare, biomedical research, and biotechnological advancement. We exist to educate and inform members of the general public, thought leaders, lawmakers, and others on ethical issues in healthcare, biomedical research, and biotechnological advancement by intentionally bring together diverse voices from across the spectrum of human experience to build common cause in addressing the crucial questions that accompany these fields.

Connect with CBC:

https://cbc-network.org 

X: @kal_fell and @CBCnetwork

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@Cbc-networkOrg 

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

Just Ingredients
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This episode is brought to you by Cozy Earth, makers of luxuriously soft bamboo sheets, blankets, and sleep essentials. Because your rest matters, mamas. Cozy Earth makes it easier to get the cozy, breathable sleep your body (and your little one) deserve. Use code HEHE at https://cozyearth.com/ for 20% off your order and treat yourself to the sleep you’ve been dreaming of.

In this episode of The Birth Lounge Podcast, HeHe is back behind the mic for the first newly recorded episode since having her baby and let’s just say… postpartum has been full of surprises.

Three months in, she’s sharing the unexpected symptoms no one warned her about. From intense cold flashes (sometimes right after eating or nursing) to a wave of jealousy and nausea when someone else holds her baby, HeHe gets honest about the weird, emotional, and very real postpartum moments that don’t make it into most conversations.

She also talks about the shock of a painfully strong breastfeeding letdown that feels like electricity, random hormone symptoms like a metallic taste in her mouth, and even scalp sensitivity that suddenly made ponytails unbearable.

And yes… we’re talking about the “downstairs” surprises too. HeHe shares about severe rectal pain after a long pushing phase, intense vaginal itchiness, and the random “throbbing vagina” sensation that had her briefly spiraling before getting reassurance from her midwife and pelvic floor physical therapist.

This episode is honest, a little funny, and deeply validating for anyone navigating the wild world of postpartum recovery. If you’ve ever wondered “is this normal?” after having a baby, you are definitely not alone.

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

Check out HeHe’s birth story here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noh5eFpCFcs

In this episode of The Birth Lounge Podcast, HeHe sits down with former labor and delivery nurse, mom of nine, and founder of Transformational Motherhood, Sarah Martin, for a real talk conversation about labor room rights, hospital policies, and what it actually looks like to advocate for yourself during birth.

Together, they pull back the curtain on how hospital systems work, why many hospital birth classes can be biased, and why evidence-based childbirth education outside the hospital can make such a difference. Sarah shares practical ways families can navigate the system with more confidence, from choosing a provider who aligns with your goals to requesting a specific provider, hiring a doula, and understanding your right to informed consent.

They also talk about fear-based maternity care, how to decline students or procedures you are not comfortable with, when it is appropriate to request a different nurse, and how to report concerns if you feel disrespected or mistreated. This conversation is all about helping parents understand their options, protect their autonomy, and walk into the birth room feeling informed, supported, and in control.

This episode originally aired Tuesday Mar 02, 2021 and can be found here:  https://podcast.thebirthlounge.com/e/ep-154-rights-in-the-labor-room-with-sarah-martin-rn/

Guest Bio:

Sarah Martin is a mother of 9, an experienced OB nurse, and founder of Transformational Motherhood (previously Traditional Motherhood).  Sarah has taken her passion, knowledge and experience in pregnancy, birth and postpartum to create a community dedicated to education, empowerment and support of expectant and new mamas to take them from feeling scared to confidently prepared! Traditional Motherhood is taking expectant and new mamas from scared to confidently prepared through education.

Connect with Sarah: 

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/transformationalmotherhood/

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

Temp Drop
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This episode is brought to you by Cozy Earth, makers of luxuriously soft bamboo sheets, blankets, and sleep essentials. Because your rest matters, mamas. Cozy Earth makes it easier to get the cozy, breathable sleep your body (and your little one) deserve. Use code HEHE at https://cozyearth.com/ for 20% off your order and treat yourself to the sleep you’ve been dreaming of.

In this episode, HeHe sits down with Dr. Kristin Lasseter to unpack perinatal mental health with a focus on postpartum anxiety (PPA) versus postpartum depression (PPD), how they differ, and when “baby blues” may signal something more. While mood shifts are common in the early postpartum days, symptoms that persist beyond a couple of weeks, disrupt sleep, bring constant anxiety or sadness, intrusive thoughts, or thoughts of death deserve real support.

They talk candidly about the guilt, shame, and fear of judgment that keep many women silent, and why telling one safe person can be a powerful first step. The conversation explores common risk factors like fertility struggles, pregnancy or birth complications, and PMDD, along with the significant hormonal shift that happens after the placenta is delivered and why the brain can feel especially vulnerable during that window.

HeHe and Dr. Lasseter also navigate the often-stigmatized topic of psychiatric medication during pregnancy and postpartum. They discuss why abruptly stopping medication is usually unsafe, how to thoughtfully weigh medication risks against the risks of untreated mental illness, what research tells us about breastfeeding compatibility, and what to expect when starting or adjusting treatment. They touch on newer, faster-acting postpartum depression options, therapy modalities like CBT and EMDR, and additional treatments such as TMS and ECT.

The episode closes with an honest conversation about bounce-back culture, social media pressure, and choosing support systems that protect a mother’s mental health. Throughout, the message is clear: evidence-based care matters, suffering in silence isn’t a badge of honor, and there is no shame in using medication when it’s needed.

0:00 - Introduction: Mental Health Medications in Pregnancy & Postpartum

4:36 - Postpartum Anxiety vs Postpartum Depression: Key Differences

6:01 - Normal Baby Blues vs Red Flags: When to Seek Help

9:51 - Intrusive Thoughts & Breaking the Stigma

17:26 - Medication Safety in Pregnancy: What You Need to Know

24:43 - Should You Stop Your Meds When Pregnant?

30:03 - Hormones & Mental Health: The Postpartum Crash

43:56 - Breastfeeding While on Psychiatric Medications

51:26 - How Long Should You Stay on Medication?

60:50 - Fighting the "Bounce Back" Culture & Social Media's Impact

Guest Bio:

Kristin Yeung Lasseter, MD is a Board-Certified Psychiatrist in Texas who specializes in Reproductive Psychiatry and Women’s Mental Health. 

She graduated cum laude from Southwestern University with a Bachelors of Science in Biology prior to attending medical school at the Long School of Medicine at the University of Texas Health Science Center in San Antonio. Dr. Lasseter excelled in medical school and was awarded membership into the prestigious Alpha Omega Alpha Medical Honor Society.

After receiving her Medical Degree, she completed Psychiatry residency at Dell Medical School at The University of Texas at Austin where she served as Chief Resident. She additionally spent time training in Reproductive Psychiatry at Baylor College of Medicine in Houston. 

Dr. Lasseter founded Reproductive Psychiatry Clinic of Austin in 2018, which now hosts multiple psychiatrists and psychotherapists specialized in treating mental health disorders related to the reproductive lifespan. She dedicates much of her time educating the public and other providers about reproductive mental illness through speaking engagements, writing and social media.

Connect with Dr. Lasseter: 

 www.rpcaustin.com   www.kristinlassetermd.com   https://www.instagram.com/the.reproductive.psychiatrist

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/

 Connect with Dr. Lasseter on IG: https://www.instagram.com/the.reproductive.psychiatrist

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

Maternal Mental Health Suicide Hotline: 1-833-TLC-MAMA

Postpartum Support International: https://postpartum.net/

Ep. 429: The Science Behind Intrusive Thoughts with Dr. Katayune Kaeni aka Dr. Kat

In this episode of The Birth Lounge, HeHe sits down with perinatal psychologist Dr. Kat to have the conversation we don’t have enough: the real, nuanced truth about mental health in pregnancy and postpartum.

They break down the full spectrum of perinatal mood and anxiety disorders, including postpartum depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, panic attacks, bipolar disorder, and postpartum psychosis. They cover what’s common, what’s urgent, and what deserves immediate support.

A major focus of this conversation is intrusive thoughts.

Dr. Kat explains that intrusive thoughts are incredibly common, especially postpartum. They are typically unwanted, distressing, and they don’t reflect your true desires. But when thoughts become frequent, graphic, intense, or begin to interfere with daily functioning (like avoiding holding your baby out of fear), that’s when it’s time to reach out for professional support.

HeHe shares personal examples and normalizes how sleep deprivation, hormonal shifts, stress, and identity changes can amplify anxiety and intrusive thoughts, while emphasizing that struggling does not mean you are broken.

They discuss:

• How to tell the difference between common intrusive thoughts and something more serious
  
  
• Why suicide is the second leading cause of death in the postpartum period
  
  
• When therapy and/or medication are appropriate and valid tools
  
  
• How to talk to your partner and loved ones about not feeling like yourself
  
  
• Why reassurance alone may not be enough for severe anxiety or OCD
  
  
• How to use resources like Postpartum Support International
  
  
• The importance of proactive conversations during pregnancy
  
  

This episode is compassionate, evidence-based, and deeply validating.

If you have ever thought, “Why is my brain doing this?” or felt afraid to say your thoughts out loud, this conversation will help you understand what’s happening, and remind you that support is not weakness. It is care.

You deserve to feel safe in your own mind.

Guest Bio:

Katayune Kaeni, Psy.D. PMH-C, aka, Dr. Kat is a perinatal mental health certified psychologist, author of The Pregnancy Workbook: Manage Anxiety and Worry with CBT and Mindfulness Techniques, and host of the Mom & Mind Podcast, the longest-running perinatal mental health podcast since 2016, covering perinatal mental health personal stories and expert interviews. She volunteers her time, serving on the board of Postpartum Support International (PSI) as a board member and as the immediate past chair. Dr. Kat began specializing in perinatal mental health after her own experience with postpartum depression, anxiety, and OCD over 14 years ago. Dr. Kat continues to offer psychotherapy virtually to clients across California.

www.momandmind.com, IG and Tiktok @momandmind, FB @momandmindpodcast

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Connect with Dr. Kat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/momandmind/

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

PSI descriptions of symptoms: https://paulspector.com/assessments/pauls-no-cost-assessments/physical-symptoms-inventory/

What are the most common reasons for a home birth transfer?
Is every transfer an emergency?

If you’ve found yourself wondering about this, you’re exactly where you need to be.

In this episode of The Birth Lounge, HeHe sits down with birth doula, childbirth educator, business owner, former teacher, and MSW student Jen Walts to talk about something that doesn’t get discussed enough: creating a thoughtful transfer plan to support a smooth, patient-centered, trauma-informed transition from a home or birth center setting to the hospital if the need arises. Because here’s the truth: planning for transfer isn’t planning for failure — it’s planning for safety, flexibility, and peace of mind.

HeHe and Jen walk through why transfer planning matters and encourage parents to ask their midwife about transfer timing and transfer rates (and why a rate of zero can actually be a red flag). They gently reframe transfer as a responsible, informed pivot when circumstances call for additional support.

This conversation covers common reasons for transfer, like maternal health, baby’s health, and access to additional tools such as pain management (including epidurals), assisted vaginal delivery options, and postpartum repair.

They also explore how fear of the hospital can complicate transfer, the importance of understanding the “why” behind birth location choice, how a transfer can impact the nervous system, and the role of surrender and flexibility when a birth plan changes. Jen recommends developing a hospital backup birth preference sheet, including a shorter “top 10” list of non-negotiables to share with the receiving team, with examples such as immediate skin-to-skin, backup skin-to-skin plans if separation occurs, delayed cord clamping, newborn feeding preferences, and cesarean-specific requests. 

Guest Bio:

Jen has been a birth doula, childbirth educator and business owner for five years. She taught high school for ten years and is now pursuing her second Masters degree. She hopes to become a licensed social worker and therapist to children and families in Massachusetts.

Connect with Jen here: Thebirthpath.org

https://www.pioneervalleydoulas.com/

Get $100 OFF Hypnobirthing with Jen Walts (virtual or in person) when you mention that heard about it here! 

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Connect with Jen on IG: https://www.instagram.com/_thebirthpath_/

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

This episode is brought to you by Cozy Earth, makers of luxuriously soft bamboo sheets, blankets, and sleep essentials. Because your rest matters, mamas. Cozy Earth makes it easier to get the cozy, breathable sleep your body (and your little one) deserve. Use code HEHE at https://cozyearth.com/ for 20% off your order and treat yourself to the sleep you’ve been dreaming of.

In this episode of The Birth Lounge Podcast, HeHe is joined by Tracy aka Modern Day Midwife (a hospital-based midwife in Arizona with a NICU background) for a candid, behind-the-scenes conversation about the realities of modern healthcare.

Together, they unpack how the U.S. healthcare system is failing both patients and providers, from provider burnout and lack of mental health support to the pressures of hospital politics, insurance reimbursement, and productivity quotas.

They explore the difference between  “Medicine 1.0” (acute care) and “Medicine 2.0” (preventative care, functional medicine, wellness), and how insurance-driven, fee-for-service models often prioritize sick care over true health. The result? Confusing medical bills, rushed care, poor patient experiences, and providers who are stretched thin despite doing deeply meaningful work.

HeHe and Tracy dive into the unique challenges facing women’s health, maternity care, and birth: over-medicalization, the cascade of interventions, the limits of 10-minute OB-GYN appointments, maternity care deserts, and the need for individualized care, informed consent, and continuity of care. From ACOG guidelines to ever changing evidence and research, they explore possible solutions including a midwifery-led model of care, better transfer systems for home birth and birth center patients, coverage for doulas and health coaching, and shifting consumer demand away from traditional insurance and towards alternatives like health shares. 

Tracy shares her exciting vision for an integrated wellness hub that could include midwifery, obstetrics, pelvic floor PT, lactation, chiropractic care, and community-based health supports, and ends by sharing how to connect with her at Premier OB GYN in Phoenix and via Modern Day Midwife online and on Instagram.

00:00 Why Healthcare Breaks Providers

02:24 Burnout and Speaking Up

04:59 Fear and Privilege in Advocacy

07:18 Who Supports Clinicians

12:32 Medicine 1.0 vs Prevention

17:25 Billing Confusion and Fee for Service

19:06 Burn It Down or Reform It

23:55 Disrupting Insurance and Incentives

26:49 Birth Care Needs a New Model

29:36 Preeclampsia Prevention Debate

30:47 Rethinking Maternity Care Roles

32:04 Money in Wellness Care

34:55 Building a One Stop Birth Hub

37:43 Continuity Across Birth Settings

41:45 Evidence Based Medicine Reality Check

47:56 ACOG Guidelines vs Individual Choice

53:23 Demanding Individualized Care

55:11 Rebuilding Healthcare and Provider Support

56:59 Where to Find Tracy

58:15 Closing Thanks and Resources

Guest Bio:

Meet Tracy Burns, Board Certified Nurse Midwife. Tracy graduated from the University of Cincinnati in 2003 with her bachelor's degree in nursing. After graduation, Tracy spent a year in labor and delivery as a bedside RN and then took a job in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital. Tracy spent the first 13 years of her career taking care of premature infants and mothers before pursuing her advanced practice career in Women’s Health.

Tracy graduated from the University of Cincinnati in 2017 with her Master’s degree in Midwifery. With a big heart for women, Tracy is an advocate for midwifery care for women and the continuity of care model. Tracy has been an active team player in bringing midwifery services to Banner Estrella and Abrazo West. Tracy is passionate about health and wellness. She believes in using a functional/integrative approach to health promotion/disease prevention through an early introduction to nutrition, exercise, mindfulness, sleep, and community. Tracy is committed to caring for women by collaborating with other like-minded providers who are as committed to changing the way we care for women in America.

Tracy is married and has two teenage daughters. She enjoys Crossfit, hiking, and spending time with family and friends. She is a co-owner of Crossfit Fury, CrossFit Trainer, and BirthFit professional. Tracy and her husband are actively involved in changing maternal and neonatal outcomes globally through Helping Babies and Mothers Survive Campaign.

Connect with Tracy here: Www.moderndaymidwife.com

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Connect with Tracy on IG: https://www.instagram.com/moderndaymidwife/

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

In this episode of The Birth Lounge Podcast, HeHe welcomes Kara, a Mother-Baby Nurse and mom of three, to walk through what actually happens after you leave labor and delivery and transition to postpartum care. From fundal checks and C-section vitals to newborn screenings, pain management, lactation support, and discharge, this episode gives you clarity without overwhelm.

This episode is detailed, practical, and empowering. Postpartum in the hospital doesn’t have to feel chaotic when you understand what’s routine, what’s optional, and where your voice matters most.

00:00 Speak Up in the Hospital: You Can Say No (Advocacy Mindset)

01:05 Listener Story: Holding Firm Against 39-Week Induction Pressure

03:56 How to Use the Birth Lounge App to Back Up Your Choices

06:10 Maternity Leave Update + Why This Episode Is a Re-Air

07:50 Postpartum in the Hospital: What We’ll Cover (Tests, Checks, Taboo Topics)

09:08 Meet Kara the Baby Nurse: Mother-Baby RN + Mom of Three

10:40 The Postpartum Unit Reality Check: It’s More Than ‘Rest and Discharge’

12:10 Transition from L&D to Postpartum: Bedside Report + LDRP vs Separate Units

15:25 First 4 Hours Post-Birth: Fundal Checks, Vitals, Safety Paperwork, Goals

18:27 Getting Up After Birth: Movement, Gas Pain, and C-Section Recovery

20:47 If You Decline Fundal Checks: Bleeding & Clot Warning Signs to Watch

23:19 Postpartum Pain Management: Meds, Non-Pharm Options, and Speaking Up

27:35 Who’s Coming in Your Room: Rounds, Labs, Screens, and the DND Sign

35:09 Baby’s Pediatrician Exam: Nursery vs In-Room, No-Separation Rights

39:40 Newborn Head-to-Toe Exam & Routine Postpartum Checks

40:26 Newborn Screening Labs: PKU Heel Prick, Bilirubin, Car Seat & Hearing

42:46 Sponsor Break: Lalo Registry Must-Haves (Travel High Chair + Play Kit)

45:55 Bilirubin & Jaundice: What the Numbers Mean + Phototherapy Options

48:05 Newborn Hearing Screen: How It Works & What a “Fail” Usually Means

50:28 Newborn Meds/Vaccines in Postpartum: Vit K, Erythromycin, Hep B Timing

51:45 Breastfeeding Support in the Hospital: Nurse Training, Latch Help & Pumps

55:43 Baby Weight Loss & When to Supplement (Pumping, Donor Milk, Formula)

58:24 Circumcision 101: Procedure, Pain Control, Aftercare & Red Flags

01:03:40 Advocating for Yourself: Communication, Boundaries & Requesting a New Nurse

01:07:08 The Postpartum Poop: Why Staff Ask, What Helps, When to Call Your Doctor

01:11:26 Wrap-Up: Kara’s Book & Sleep Course + Where to Follow

Guest Bio:

Kara is a mother-baby, hospital based nurse with 3 kids of her own. Her passion is educating and empowering people through her social media pages. She shares nurse tips and mom tricks, author of the book Why Didn’t I Learn all this Parent Stuff Sooner?, and creator of a tried and true baby sleep course. You can find her @karathrbabynurse on YouTube, TikTok, Facebook, and Instagram!

Connect with Kara here: https://karathebabynurse.com/link-in-bio/

Check out Kara's sleep course here: https://kara-s-site-b397.thinkific.com/courses/karathebabynurse

Snag her book here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BBSH4Q9Z/ref=sr_1_6?crid=2GWZSFDOW1WFP&keywords=kara+thompson&qid=1661365188&sprefix=kara+thompson%2Caps%2C83&sr=8-6

Connect with HeHe on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tranquilitybyhehe/ 

Connect with Kara on IG: https://www.instagram.com/karathebabynurse/

Learn how to stay in control of your birth and reduce the risk of unnecessary interventions in our Avoid a C-Section Webinar. HeHe breaks down the cascade of interventions, explains what’s really happening in the hospital, and shares practical strategies to protect your birth plan, advocate for yourself, and navigate labor with confidence. Perfect for anyone who wants a positive, informed hospital birth experience: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/csection

Feeling nervous about speaking up in labor? Our Scripts for Advocacy give you the exact words to handle the most common conversations that can make or break your birth experience. From declining unnecessary interventions to asking the right questions about procedures, these scripts empower you to stay in control, speak confidently, and protect your birth plan — even when the pressure is on. Think of it as your personal toolkit for advocating like a pro, so you can focus on your baby, not the stress: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/Scripts-for-Advocacy

And if you haven’t grabbed it yet…
Snag my free Pitocin Guide to understand the risks, benefits, and red flags your provider may not be telling you about, so you can make informed, powerful decisions in labor: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/pitocin

Join The Birth Lounge for judgment-free, evidence-based childbirth education from HeHe that shows you exactly how to navigate hospital policies, avoid unnecessary interventions, and have a trauma-free labor experience, all while feeling wildly supported every step of the way: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/

Want prep delivered straight to your phone?
Download The Birth Lounge App for bite-sized birth and postpartum tools you can use anytime, anywhere: https://www.thebirthlounge.com/app-download-page

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Beautiful, minimalist baby gear that actually works for real life. From their travel-friendly Hook-On High Chair to their durable, design-forward Play Kit, Lalo creates pieces that grow with your family and look good doing it. Head to https://www.meetlalo.com/ and use code HEHE to save.