What does sofrito—a base of herbs and spices used in Puerto Rican cooking—have to do with reimagining business, food security, and conveying a history lesson about a rich and sometimes complex culture? For today's guest, it's everything. If you've ever wondered how to weave your culture, creativity, and calling into one powerful movement... then this episode is the recipe you've been looking for.

In this episode, you will hear:

• Food has a cultural foundation passed through generations.

• Cultural identity can be preserved and taught through everyday meals.

• How to make the best sofrito if you don't have time to cook.

• Food is more than just food – it's heritage, intention, and a story.

• The story of the Puerto Rican pasteles is shared.

• Food choices are power moves, shaping local or global economies.

• Imagination makes it possible to wear multiple hats and still stay rooted in purpose.

• You don't need permission to do things differently, just the will and a plan.

This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination: A Guide for Stretching Every Mom's Superpower for Maximum Impact by Melissa Llarena Audible

Audio Edition: https://www.amazon.com/Fertile-Imagination-Stretching-Superpower-Maximum/dp/B0CY9BZH9W/ref=tmm_aud_swatch_0

Paperback: https://www.amazon.com/Fertile-Imagination-Stretching-Superpower-Maximum/dp/B0CK2ZSMLB

Hardcover: https://www.amazon.com/Fertile-Imagination-Stretching-Superpower-Maximum/dp/B0D5B64347/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0

Or, download a free chapter at fertileideas.com

About Crystal Diaz

Crystal Díaz has spent nearly two decades at the intersection of food, marketing, and cultural advocacy. She co-founded PRoduce, Puerto Rico's digital marketplace for locally grown food. Crystal is also the force behind El Pretexto, the island's first culinary farm lodge, where food and imagination meet 2,600 feet above sea level. A committed advocate for food security, she collaborates with Espacios Abiertos to advance agricultural policy. Crystal holds two master's degrees, including one in Food Studies from NYU. She's been recognized by Fast Company and El Nuevo Día for her creative leadership and impact in the local food movement.

Quotes that can change your perspective:

"If you really want to learn about something and you're obsessed about it, there's always ways to learn, to make it happen." – Crystal Díaz

"With every single meal that we do, with every single snack, everything that we eat, you are impacting economies. And if you want to support your local communities and you want to see them, everybody having a better life, you might want to spend that dollar closer home and making sure that all of the ingredients that are on that food are closer to home so that money stays closer to home." – Crystal Díaz

"Sofrito is very personal. You know? It's part of how your family has done it… but also learn that there is a lot of history into it. It's not something that we do because we do it. There is a lot of history to it." – Crystal Díaz

"We are on a little island. We don't have that much territorial extension, so we can't think about our agriculture as other countries that have large extensions of terrains and flats and stuff like that. We need to think about it differently." – Crystal Díaz

"Puerto Rican food is full of history, is complex enough, is flavorful enough, and varied… so I can pull something like this [a culinary farm lodge] up in Puerto Rico." – Crystal Díaz

SHARE this episode with fellow food lovers, cultural storytellers, and moms on a mission to raise rooted kids. Crystal's insights on local food, identity, and imagination will inspire anyone looking to nourish their family and community from the inside out. Let's keep our culture alive—one pastel, one sofrito, and one big idea at a time.

Supporting Resources:

Website: https://www.elpretextopr.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elpretextopr

Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/@elpretextopr/

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About Fertile Imagination

You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert!

In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination!

Advance Praise

"You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator

"Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money

"This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX

TRANSCRIPT

00:00:00 Crystal: Come up with ideas to make it easier for food producers to produce more food because we are in a little island. We don't have that much territorial extension. So we can't think about our agriculture as other countries that have large extensions of terrains and flats and stuff like that. We need to think it differently.

00:00:25 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're gonna get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going, and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood.

00:00:47 Melissa: Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out, and stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening.

00:01:17 Melissa: So what does sofrito, which is essentially a base of herbs and spices used in Puerto Rican cooking, have to do with reimagining business, food security, and passing along really critical history lessons. Well, for today's guest, it is everything. And if you've ever wondered how to weave your culture, creativity, and calling into one powerful movement, then this episode is the recipe you've been looking for.

00:01:49 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. This is your weekly podcast designed to inspire you to dream bigger in your business and your life. Also, to help you find the energy to keep going because how are you going to sustain what's necessary to be big and to keep your imagination flowing so that this way you could feel inspired, lit up like a Christmas tree or Hanukkah candles. I'm your host Melissa Llarena.

00:02:17 Melissa: I'm a mom of three high energy boys. No. They did not get their energy from me. Psyched. They did. I'm also a best selling author of Fertile Imagination and an imagination coach for mom founders who are reimagining what success and motherhood can look like on their own terms, and that's really important.

00:02:34 Melissa: Now, if you've ever stirred a pot of sofrito, you already know this. Right? You know that the blend of flavors tells a deeper story. It tells a story that sometimes has made its way across generations. It preserves a culture, and it does nourish more than just our baby's bellies.

00:02:56 Melissa: So today's guest, I am thrilled to invite Crystal Diaz. Now she's taken the same approach in terms of her business ventures. She's a foodpreneur, culture keeper, I love that, and community builder. She wears four hats and in today's episode we're gonna go through each of those hats. One of which is as the owner of El Pretexto, i.e. The Excuse, a culinary farm lodge in the countryside of Puerto Rico where she serves 100% locally sourced meals and lives her mission every day.

00:03:33 Melissa: She has lots of degrees and an MA in food studies from NYU, which is why if you're watching the video, you could see, I hope, my NYU t-shirt. Hit subscribe if you see it and you love it. Subscribe on YouTube. Hit follow on this podcast.

00:03:53 Melissa: A little bit more about Crystal. She was recognized by Fast Company as one of the most creative people in business in 2022 and was named one of El Nuevo Diaz women of the year in 2023. She's the real deal. In this episode, we're gonna explore how Crystal uses her imagination as her main ingredient, whether it's in terms of the way that she's carving away for Puerto Rico to have its own food centric cultural immersive experience or even by how she decided to commute to NYU from San Juan every single week, which was creative in and of itself, or even in terms of the way that she describes the depth of a very famous Puerto Rican dish.

00:04:43 Melissa: Oh, and side note, I actually have her real life best on the planet, sofrito recipe. My gosh, do not run away, For sure. Check out the sofrito recipe we articulated in this conversation. You're gonna walk away with yummy ideas for how to use your own imagination to nourish your business, your family, and community, and it's gonna be so important even if you're not working in food.

00:05:13 Melissa: So before we dig in, I would appreciate if you hit follow, if you're listening to this on iTunes. Why hit follow? Because every time someone hits follow on iTunes, it tells me that I need to bring more guests with stories like this to the podcast. And I get really excited and when a mom is excited, it is a very good day in her entire home. So go ahead, hit follow. You will absolutely get that dopamine hit that everybody needs or if you're watching this on YouTube, then hit subscribe. I would be so appreciative and again, I will do the dance of joy. Okay. So enjoy the conversation.

00:05:54 Melissa: Crystal Diaz, thank you so much for this conversation on the Mom Founder Imagination hub. We are delighted to have you here. Crystal, just to kind of set off the scenery, why don't you explain to us where you are in Puerto Rico? What's outside your windows?

00:06:10 Crystal: All right. Well, let's… our imagination hub in a car. We are in San Juan, and you drove forty five minutes south, up to the mountains. Now we are in Cayey. I am at El Pretexto, which is also my home, and we are overlooking… we're up in the mountains, 2,600 feet over sea level, overlooking the Caribbean Sea at the south, and all the mountains slowly winding down all the way to the coast.

00:06:43 Crystal: And you will have some crazy chickens surrounding you. In my patio while you are probably sipping a wine or a coffee, depending on the time of the day. Enjoying the view and, surrounded by trees, lush greenery all over the place. And there are gardens on your side, also as well. So you are surrounded definitely by nature and you feel at peace. That's where we are.

00:07:15 Melissa: Oh, okay. Cool. So let's bring that sense of peace to this conversation. I am excited because I'm sure any listener right now who is a mom, has a business, might feel a little frazzled now and again. But right now, for the next thirty minutes, this is a peaceful zone. We are in Puerto Rico right now.

00:07:37 Melissa: Okay. So, Crystal, now I'm gonna ask you an obvious question, as you just described what you are surrounded by in Puerto Rico. But you attended NYU, and I'm just kind of super curious. You could have stayed in New York, let's say. Right? You could have been like this chef at a restaurant in New York City, Michelin star, etcetera, etcetera. But you decided to return home. And so I'm just curious, like, what informed that decision?

00:08:13 Crystal: Well, you will be surprised with my answer because I never left home. I commuted every single week to New York. Coming on to the city, take my classes, back to my home. So for two years, I was traveling every week to New York for one day.

00:08:34 Melissa: Oh my gosh. Yeah. That is so surprising. Okay. So now I'm just curious here. Okay. So you were on a plane. So, usually people complain about their commute. Right?

00:08:48 Crystal: Uh-huh.

00:08:49 Melissa: They have this whole return to work aggravation. Here you are getting on a plane every single week to take courses at NYU. So then let me ask you this other question. So I know that it's a little off track, but now I'm just way curious. Why did it have to be NYU? That's quite the pull.

00:09:13 Crystal: Yeah. Well, my background is in marketing, and I have a BA in Marketing with a Minor in Advertising and Public Relations. Then I worked with a newspaper for fourteen years. So my background is all about business and marketing. Then I did a first master degree here in Puerto Rico, in the University of Puerto Rico, about cultural action and management. And then, I wanted – because at this point, I believe that I am not passionate anymore. I am kind of obsessed with food, and I guess we will get into that later.

00:09:58 Crystal: But, I wanted to learn the policy part of it. And in Puerto Rico, we don't have any program in any of the universities nor public or private, specifically about food, and way less food policies and advocacy and that type of perspective on the food system, which is what I wanted to learn. So that's why I ended up in New York. I decided to do this because it's a direct flight. So it's gonna be a three hours and a half flight going in, then the one hour in the A train until Westport.

00:10:49 Crystal: Even though I know it's intense, it was pretty straightforward. You don't have make a stop then take another plane. And I was studying and reading all my plane hours, so there's no excuse to not complete your assignments, I guess.

00:11:07 Melissa: Yeah. I love that. Okay. So, hey, that is 100% using your imagination because I think a lot of us, myself included, I wouldn't have considered that to be an option in my mind. I still don't. Right? It's gotta be a certain set of circumstances that make that a possibility. But, I love that now that's an idea that we just planted in someone's head. Right? If they really are obsessed. Right?

00:11:35 Crystal: And if you really want to learn about something and you're obsessed about it, there's always ways to learn, to make it happen. And to my point, New York is so expensive that I spend way less money in flight tickets than actually living there.

00:11:56 Melissa: Yeah. That makes a lot of sense. Okay. So this is really interesting. Okay. So you could have stayed in New York, but you didn't even choose to stay in New York when you were taking classes at NYU. So now you have the whole, like… that's just so that's fascinating, Crystal. You really gobsmacked me right now with that piece of information.

00:12:18 Melissa: So along the same lines of using your imagination and thinking totally out of the box, let me ask you this one question. So, El Pretexto, of course, we'll go into what it is and all of that. But I also wanna understand because on your website, you say that you've traveled the world. Right? So you've seen all these different culinary experiences. And using your imagination and imagining where or how would you imagine Puerto Rico's cuisine fitting into the landscape of world gastro– I can't say the rest of that word, but I know it's a real word.

00:12:57 Crystal: Yes. Well, for me, I love to travel. I am a girl of no luxuries. Right? I don't care about purses or new shoes or jewelry. It's like I don't judge, but I don't care. So where I spend my money and my time, which I can't… money, you can recover it somehow, but time is just one time. You just have every minute that you have.

00:13:27 Crystal: And I like to spend those traveling and getting to know other cultures and exposing myself to other cultures. And I think that those travels have pushed me to understand and appreciate what we have back here at home and also understand the opportunities that we have back here at home. Not everybody is doing it perfectly, but you can definitely learn how it is done in other places. And I'm talking generally. Right? Depending on what you are interested.

00:14:01 Crystal: But you always learn of how the world do things in other places. So, I in my case, I love food and I try to expose myself, not only to eating in good restaurants or good food, but I love to go to markets. I even go to supermarkets every time I travel. I like to visit farms and I noticed, especially in Mexico, you can see this – Peru is developing this a lot and Italy has it all set.

00:14:40 Melissa: On lockdown.

00:14:41 Crystal: But you have these culinary experiences where you get to… expose to their cuisine, with a local chef and and you go to their farmers' markets and you get the whole country but with a special focus in food. And I was like, "You know what? Puerto Rican food is full of history, is complex enough, is flavorful enough, and varied so I can pull something like this up in Puerto Rico." So that's how one of our offerings about the curated food experiences came to be because I was sure that somebody will have the curiosity to get to know Puerto Rico from its food.

00:15:33 Crystal: So that's how I got into there. And I think that because I am obsessed with the fact that Puerto Rico imports 90% of everything that we eat, I am then focused on cherish and enhance and share that 10% what it can be if we actually put a lot of effort into grow that 10% into 20%, let's say.

00:16:08 Melissa: That's interesting. So okay. So, I mean, I'm not cynical, but, in my opinion, I kind of believe that the person that controls food source kinda controls a lot. And that's not fantastic. And so I'm just wondering from a policy perspective and as you think about this share of stomach or however it's really considered, are you also part of that conversation too? Like, are you actively advocating for that too?

00:16:45 Crystal: Yes. Yes. I always say I have a couple of hats for all those also thinking that you only have to do one thing and one thing only. If you want to do one thing and one thing only, that's okay. But in my case, I am focused on food, but I try to deal with it from different perspectives. So I have four hats.

00:17:09 Crystal: And one of my hats, specifically works with food policy advocacy. And we try to understand the local food policies that are in place, understanding what programs work, what programs doesn't work, and then trying to make it as… to come up with ideas to make it easier for food producers to produce more food.

00:17:41 Crystal: Because we are in a little island. We don't have that much territorial extension, so we can't think about our agriculture as other countries that have large extensions of terrains and flats and stuff like that. We need to think it differently. And I am not against importation. We all have globalized diets, and we love olive oil, and we can't produce that in Puerto Rico. And we love wine, and we can't produce that in Puerto Rico.

00:18:16 Crystal: So it's not like, all the way 100%. That's not what I mean. But definitely, we should aim to have, let's say, half of our stomach-share full of food that is produced locally. Not only because of its nutritional value, but also because it means economic growth and development for our island and our local communities. So every dollar that you spend on food… somebody might be hearing us while they are eating something.

00:18:55 Crystal: So you imagine whatever you're eating right now, let's say it cost you $1. It depends on where the ingredients came from, that dollar went to that place. It depends on where it was processed, part of that dollar went to that place. And then if you bought it in the supermarket or if you bought it in Amazon, to who you gave that share of that dollar.

00:22 Crystal: So with every single meal that we do, with every single snack, everything that we eat, you are impacting economies. And if you want to support your local communities and you want to see them, everybody having a better life, you might want to spend that dollar closer home and making sure that all of the ingredients that are on that food are closer to home so that money stays closer to home. And that's how I see it.

00:19:58 Crystal: How do we make that that share of that dollar that we as consumers have the power to choose where it goes. And, by the way, there are some parts that we have the power and some part we don't have the power. I understand that. But how do we make an effort in whatever way we can to stay as close as possible to our home.

00:20:24 Melissa: So I think you said that… was that one out of your four hats?

00:20:28 Crystal: Yes.

00:20:29 Melissa: What are the other three?

00:20:30 Crystal: Well, El Pretexto, which is a bed and breakfast, is our Puerto Rico's first and only culinary farm lodge. This is my home, but I also welcome guests here. So El Pretexto is my second one. I'm the co-founder of PRoduct, which is a digital marketplace that connects local food producers with consumers directly. We're trying to shorten that food chain and make it easier and convenient to get local products on your home. We deliver island wide. So that's my third hat. And then I have a super small, digital, marketing agency with another partner, and it's all focused on food and beverage. So everything is about food but from different perspectives.

00:21:25 Melissa: Yeah. That's so interesting because it's almost like you have a little supply chain kind of going on. Right? It's like we've got a lot going on, but it's all related to eating, which is essential. But I think it's smart. I mean, you have your little niche there. Huge niche. We keep being hungry, so you're in a good spot, I would say.

00:21:49 Melissa: So let me understand this idea about food and how you saw it as an opportunity for Puerto Rico because it has a rich history. Right? So me as a mom, for example, I'm second generation from a Puerto Rican perspective. As a mom, for me, passing down culture is urgent. It's almost on the verge of extinction, I feel, because of where I am generationally. Like, I'm, quote, unquote, "amongst people that I know I'm not," quote, unquote, "supposed to know Spanish." I'm not, quote, unquote, "supposed to literally make rice and beans every day," which by the way, I don't have to. But my goodness, my children really like their rice and beans. And I am so lazy. So that is all I make because I just want one pot.

00:22:40 Melissa: But anyway, so culture, food, that's the one way that I pass it along. Right? You are what you eat. So guess what? My kids are Puerto Rican and Cuban, at this stage. Yes. They have Dominican in them, but, hey, that's just my culinary preference. So tell me about this idea of culture, Puerto Rican culture. And I would be super curious if you could maybe choose an example of a cuisine or food and just kind of walk us through how that kind of expresses culture or maybe there's a story behind it that is unique to Puerto Rico.

00:23:20 Crystal: Well, for me and my mentor used to be doctor Cruz Miguel Ortiz Cuadra, which was the only food historian in Puerto Rico. He passed two years ago, but I learned so much from him and pretty much I was his daughter. He inherit me all his library, which I have here, home. And, so we discussed this a lot. And I think that we both shared that the ultimate dish that represents the Puerto Rican culture will be the pasteles. For those that doesn't know what a pastel is, it's a tamal like preparation. But the tamales are corn based and they use corn leaves to wrap it up. The pasteles puertorriqueños is made out of a dough made out of root vegetables mainly.

00:24:20 Crystal: It will have bananas and plantains that we got from our African in [inaudible]. It will have pumpkin, which were already with our Taino peoples here in America. It will have yautia, which also was here in Puerto Rico. And then, it will have some pork stew that was brought by the Spanish people. So you have in one dish our full heritage of the three cultures that have conformed the Puerto Rican-ness in just one dish.

00:25:01 Crystal: And then that works too will use, what is the ultimate base of flavor of the Puerto Rican cuisine, which is the sofrito. And the sofrito itself also is a blend of African, Spanish, and Taino ingredients, but it's a bricolage of flavors and smells that then go into the stew that then is used to make the pastel. And the pastel is also representative of the most authentic Puerto Rican soul because el pastel is wrapped as a gift.

00:25:40 Crystal: And if you were poor and there was a lot of poverty in Puerto Rico at some – we still have, but there used to be a lot of poverty back in the days. If you didn't have any resources, monetary resources to gift things, you will make pasteles with the things that are on your patio. You will have that growing up in your patio, in your garden, and then you will do pasteles, and you will gift that to your adult, kids, to your sisters, to your brothers.

00:26:13 Crystal: And so because it's – now we have technology, and now we can use food processors and so on. But back in the day, you had to grate that by hand. So if you have that gift, I am not only gifting you my talent and the products that I grow in my patio, but I'm also gifting my time. So it's a very meaningful way of telling someone that you really care about them.

00:26:42 Crystal: And that's all about Puerto Ricans. We care. We care a lot. We want to share everything that we have. And all the visitors that we have, they all can say that Puerto Ricans are always nice to them. Even if we have people that doesn't speak so much English, they will take you to whatever place you wanted to go, trying to understand you and enjoying our island. So I think that the pastel is representative of all the goodness of the Puerto Ricans.

00:27:16 Melissa: Let's pause for a second. If you've been nodding your head all along while listening to Crystal talk about food as fuel for imagination, then I wanna put this on your radar. My book, Fertile Imagination is for any mom who's ever thought, "I know I'm capable of more, but I don't know where to start."

00:27:39 Melissa: And as one Amazon reviewer said this of my book, Fertile Imagination, which is all about maximizing your superpower to make your maximum impact, She says this, "It's a non judgmental kick in the butt to start valuing your whole selves and to create a new reality where we combine motherhood with our big dreams. Whether you're chasing an idea during nap time or whispering your big vision," this is hilarious, "into a spatula, then this book is your creative permission slip."

00:28:17 Melissa: You're gonna hear stories, especially if you like this conversation with Crystal. You're gonna hear a story as well from a podcast guest that I had here who is a James Beard award winning chef, Gabriele Corcos. And you're gonna learn about how he has really latched on to this idea of novelty as his way to explore new categories of interest in his one beautiful life. So I want to just be sure that you realize that this conversation is the beginning of the process. I wanted you to see through Crystal how if your imagination was reawakened, you can start to reimagine how you approach your own life. And I think that's important.

00:29:04 Melissa: But then the book, Fertile Imagination, goes on and adds some tools that you can actually use to incorporate your imagination into your one divine life. And here's the thing, because you could use your imagination from any place you are in the world, you won't have to hop on a plane and go to any place. You can actually just close your eyes and replug in to the little girl that you once were who had all these beautiful ideas that you wanted to play out in the world and that's what I want for you.

00:29:41 Melissa: So here's what I have for you. Just go ahead to fertileideas.com. If you're driving, if you're running, if you're walking, you could do this in a bit. Just go to fertileideas.com and you could download a free chapter of my book, Fertile Imagination. What's really amazing about that chapter is that that chapter basically takes you to a place where you can go and travel back in time, to that moment when you were most free, to that moment where you had the world totally ahead of you and you were imagining what you wanted for your one divine life. That's what I did when I got on stage at the Magnet Theater in New York City 100 years ago now, so it feels.

00:30:25 Melissa: But I talk about that moment for me in that chapter that you can get for free right now on fertileideas.com. So back to the show. Again, shop the book. This episode is brought to you by Fertile Imagination, every mom's superpower. Go to fertileideas.com. Grab the free chapter. Why not? What are you gonna do? Have an amazing time reading a free chapter? That's the way to set yourself up for success for this summer. All right. Enjoy the rest of the conversation.

00:30:55 Melissa: I've never ever heard of un pastel in that way. I'm just like… it's fascinating because I also think it's… maybe it's just me, but I feel like there's a bit of an acquired taste to it too. Like, for me. Right? When I think about a pastel and I compare it to a tamal, I do not think about a Mexican tamal at all. I think about Cuban. I think about–

00:31:26 Crystal: Yeah. Sure.

00:31:28 Melissa: And for me, it's really fascinating to hear the story behind the pastel in the sense that it's very, very comprehensive. You could… I mean, I bet you there's probably books already. Or maybe you're gonna write a book. Maybe you got a fourth – a fifth hat to wear, right? You can write about pasteles. I mean, it's not a bad gig.

00:31:49 Melissa: But I think it's really interesting. And I think it's a testament to the fact that irrespective of where someone travels to the depth with which they can get to know and appreciate a culture is almost unlimited in a way, right? It's… like, for me and my family, I am not a Disney World person. But I've been to Disney World because it's kinda like, "Oh, we just go to Disney World and I have three kids." And you got a cat. That's a little bit of a cat. She's got a cat. If you're watching this on video, you see her big and fluffy cat. Is your cat Puerto Rican though?

00:32:29 Crystal: She is Puerto Rican. She is a sato cat.

00:32:31 Melissa: Aw.

00:32:32 Crystal: She's a rescue one.

00:32:34 Melissa: So cute. She probably eats pasteles because she's got meat on her. She's a solid cat. But, yeah, just the depth with which you could understand a culture, what I'm hearing from you, Crystal, it can absolutely include history and and careful attention to the food that you're eating. Right? I think about just everywhere that I've traveled and every time I've eaten food, it's kind of like there's almost a story or a reason for why something is on a plate, and it's not always superficial. It's not just labor profile. It could have to do with political conversations. It could have to do with whoever decided that that food would make its way to that region.

00:33:27 Melissa: But let me ask you this question then. So just to kind of close-up this conversation on something that I think is very practical, I'm gonna ask you a very selfish question. Okay, so I'm on the quest for the perfect sofrito. I'm gonna tell you what I do for my sofrito. So it's my ritual on Sundays. I take all the peppers that I find, red, green, yellow, and even orange because it comes in that pack. I also then buy cilantro. I'm in Texas, so let's just be mindful I'm limited in some of the things I can get.

00:34:05 Melissa: Also because I'm a health conscious mom, I put bone broth in the blender so that this way things can blend. Right? I put onions. I put garlic. I put some oregano. That is what's in my sofrito on a good day. Melissa's like, "Okay. I am ready to make a sofrito." How can I enhance that sofrito, or how do you teach people that visit El Pretexto how to make their own sofrito?

00:34:39 Crystal: Well, sofrito is one thing as the pasteles. Right? Everybody have their own recipe, and everybody says that their mom's sofrito is the best. Right? [inaudible] My mom's sofrito is the best. So that's the one that I do. And I'm happy to share the recipe for you because I have it written.

00:35:03 Crystal: But there are two schools of Sofrito to begin with. The school that says you do your Sofrito on a Sunday and you don't touch it… you don't do another Sofrito batch up until that one is gone in one or two weeks. And then you have my mom's school, which is you do your sofrito every time that you're gonna cook.

00:35:28 Melissa: Gotcha. Right.

00:35:31 Crystal: Obviously, that's nice for those that are retired and have all the time in the world. I do it that way. I'm not retired, but it's because I have a–

00:35:40 Melissa: That's your job.

00:35:41 Crystal: That's how she does it. And I don't want to, to your point, I want to continue her way of doing things. So, there are onions. We don't use all the colors of the bell peppers. We actually use cubanelle pepper. Onion cubanelle, then we will have the aji dulce, the sweet little pepper we need. We will have the cilantro, but we will also have culantro. [inaudible]. Yeah? And then, we will have garlic in it, a little bit of oregano, and pretty much that's the base.

00:36:29 Crystal: So depending on who you ask, there are people that will omit having the onion, and they will do it when they are cooking, if they're doing a batch. And then you will have people that will go all the way in with a lot of culantro in it, so it has that strong flavor to it. My mom's is more balanced in how much goes of each little thing in there. And we also use the bone broth, but not to blend the sofrito, but to stew the rice. If it's gonna be a stew rice, we will do bone broth instead of water with the rice.

00:37:18 Crystal: And then, the beans, we like them vegetarians. We don't use any hams or meat cuts into it. But, again, that's us. There are people that say that the most flavorful ones is with a piece of ham in it and whatever. But, I like… my mom's and mine are vegetarian. And my cat starts again.

00:37:43 Crystal: But, sofrito is is very personal. You know? It's part of how your family has done it. And as I told earlier, it's also a blend of these three cultures that goes into it. A lot of cultures have mirepoix or other type of base of flavors into their food and this is ours. So you have to make it yours but also learn that there is a lot of history into it. It's not something that we do because we do it. There is a lot of history into it. But, yeah, happy to share my mom's one with you.

00:38:29 Melissa: Yeah. For sure. Crystal, this was so amazing. So I would say around now, a lot of individuals are planning their summer holiday trips and vacations and all of that. So, maybe you can share where people can learn more about you, can learn more about El Pretexto if that's an option to them to kind of explore, and just follow your journey.

00:38:53 Crystal: Yeah. Sure. Well, a friendly reminder that it is an adults only project. So this might be your chance to… El Pretexto actually translates to "The Excuse." So this might be your excuse to having your parents take care of the kids and hop down to the island and have a little bit of a honeymoon. But, El Pretexto, you can find it at elprotextopr.com. We're also in social media @elprotextopr in Facebook and Instagram.

00:39:30 Crystal: There you will meet our chickens and photos of our garden and our harvest and the breakfast, and maybe you get a little bit hungry. In our website, you will find different options because you could come for a weekend or you could come for a weekday stay, but also you could come for these curated food experiences, which are in very specific dates around the year. We also have dinners, farm to table dinners in our property. We invite guest chefs to cook dinners, around the year.

00:40:08 Crystal: And, also, I take people to other places in the countryside to enjoy a beautiful lunch, but getting to know another piece of countryside around the island. So, El Pretexto is no other thing than the celebration of the beautiful diverse countryside of Puerto Rico. And you can check all the information there. So, yeah, feel free to follow me there.

00:40:37 Melissa: Thank you so much, Crystal. This has been amazing. Have an awesome rest of your day. Keep enjoying the peace and serenity of the mountains and the Caribbean Sea and all the beauty that you see outside your window. Thank you so much for this conversation.

00:40:53 Crystal: Thank you. Thank you for the invitation.

00:40:56 Melissa: So what's your version of a sofrito? Right? Let's take it out of the kitchen and into your home office. What sort of things for you can you put together to create your next big idea, whether it's something for business, something for your personal life or something for your family this very summer. I am so excited to have had Crystal Diaz for this conversation because I think she's inspiring all of us. She's giving us a good idea of all the ways that we could color our own individual rainbows.

00:41:33 Melissa: At the same time, I want this to just remind you that your imagination could be stirred into anything, right? Especially like tonight's dinner. So catch up on Tuesdays on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub and until then, keep cooking up ideas that only you can serve. I honestly think there's a place in this world for imaginations. And irrespective of AI and technology, at the end of the day, it's only as good as the person behind the computer screen, our prompts, our ideas, the way that we decide to use these resources.

00:42:10 Melissa: And that is the best case for you to actually keep your imagination going and playing with it. So thank you for this conversation. And again, if you are interested in learning more about the book, just go to fertileideas.com. Have an amazing rest of your day, moms.

Are these 5 resume mistakes secretly slashing your shot at a $250K marketing role in 2025—while others snatch the offers you deserve? In this must-listen episode, Melissa Llarena—career coach to Fortune 500 execs—unveils the blunders sinking corporate moms and their partners in today's brutal job market. Don't get caught out—tune in and snag a free fix before March 21st!

Episode Description: Struggling to land a top-tier marketing or advertising role in 2025—or know someone who is? Melissa Llarena, host since 2017 (with interviews like Beth Comstock and Gary Vee under her belt), dives back to her 2011 roots to help corporate pros thrive. After 13 years coaching agency leaders and execs—pre-Fertile Imagination fame—she's uncovered 5 resume mistakes tanking even the sharpest marketers. Burned-out CMOs, blindsided managers, and guilt-juggling leaders are scoring 15/60 on resumes when 50+ is the winning mark. In this episode, learn:

• The 5 resume killers—missed revenue wins, weak storytelling, and more—costing you big.
• How networking strategies and AI smarts flip flops into $250K offers.
• Why the Marketing Leader Scorecard (free till March 21st) is your DIY ticket to 50+.

Melissa's also booking interview preparation services—think Last-Minute Interview Prep for video interviews and in-person interviews, or her 9-week deep dive with multi-stakeholder interviewing strategies, cross-cultural interviews, and interview presentation support. Ready to shine? Grab her free tool and fix those mistakes now!

Free Download: Snag the Marketing Leader Scorecard at https://bit.ly/mlscore—free through March 21st, 2025. Score yourself across five key areas and see if you're competitive—or leaving $250K on the table.

Bonus Reward: Share this episode with a friend who's struggling (partner, husband, colleague), then email Melissa at [email protected] with "I forwarded to [Friend's Name]". You'll score Boost Your Interview Answers—a PDF purchased by hundreds, loaded with proven tips to ace interviews. Plus, the first 5 forwarders get a free 15-minute resume or pitch review—booked by March 31!

Keywords: Interview preparation services, interview presentation support, multi-stakeholder interviewing strategies, video interviews, in-person interviews, cross-cultural interviews, storytelling, networking strategies, resume tweaks, 2025 job market, marketing resume mistakes.

Connect:

• Book a call for VIP accelerators: www.melissallarena.com/sessions
• Follow Melissa on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissallarena/
• Share this episode—help a marketer win in 2025!

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Landing Your Dream Marketing Role in the #RemoteEra

Most marketing execs are getting ghosted in 2025—but the ones scoring Director to CMO roles are doing way more. I'll show you the exact moves that land $250K calls, even remotely.

Hi, I'm Melissa Llarena, and welcome back to the podcast. For over a decade, I've helped ambitious marketing executives and advertising leaders land their dream careers through my global job search coaching firm, Career Outcomes Matter, launched in 2011. I'm back, better than ever, with strategies that work right now—and today, we're tackling how you can stand out in this cutthroat #RemoteEra or #Hybrid job market.

Let's get real—this isn't your average job advice. In 2025, landing those rare, high-stakes marketing roles isn't about just sending a resume, cover letter, or even thoughtfully updating applications. It's about outworking and out-strategizing the competition. Let me ask you something to set the stage…

Would YOU have stayed on the Titanic, knowing you had a chance to get off before the last lifeboat was filled? Hoping you'd survive icy waters isn't smart—and neither is letting your marketing career sink when you could turn it around. You wouldn't watch a campaign fail if you knew how to save it, right? The same goes for your career, especially in today's #RemoteEra or #Hybrid world. As a high-performing marketer or job seeker, you're in a race—and it's tougher than ever to land Director-level and above roles, especially if you're a working parent or world-class aunt eyeing flexibility.

But here's the truth I've seen and helped my clients achieve: the marketers getting interviews and calls in 2025 aren't just applying—they're bringing market analysis, SOPs, portfolios, and 90–100 day plans that blow hiring leaders away. That's how you prove you're worth multiple rounds and a salary at the top end of $130K–$285K+.

Imagine cutting your job search short, writing that resignation letter, and avoiding a layoff. That's the edge I give my clients—and I'm sharing it with you today."

Let's get specific—here are four high-level marketing roles I know will attract top talent in 2025, where the differentiator is the candidate who brings the goods. These are the exact deliverables I've helped my clients create, present, and land with, along with quick pro tips based on what impresses hiring leaders:

• Headspace - Principal Brand Strategist, $130K–$183K base: Bring a one-page analysis of the mental health ecosystem—why Headspace beats Calm or other apps—and show how branding creates a utilization halo effect.
• Director of Marketing, Advisory Practice at Acquisition.com, Las Vegas, NV (Hybrid), $150K–$180K base: Prove you can lead with praise, not punishment, and explain how you'd contribute to Alex's $1B-plus vision in 36 months or less.
• SVP, Marketing Enablement at Warner Music Group, $210K–$285K base: Bring a framework showing how you'd lead a full marketing service provider audit.
• Chief of Staff, Marketing at IBM (Salary not posted): Dive into CMO Clay's vision—check his talks—and understand how McKinsey trains leaders, since you'll likely compete with McKinsey alums or IBM insiders.

*All roles can be found on LinkedIn. They are live as of March 3rd, 2025.*

These moves are what's working now to land $285K calls, even remotely. That's the 'doing more' that gets you noticed in 2025.

How do I know this works? I launched Career Outcomes Matter in 2011 to coach global marketing leaders like you, wrote Fertile Imagination—a #1 Amazon bestseller in 2023—to inspire storytelling for dream careers, and I've hosted icons like Beth Comstock and GaryVee on this podcast early on. Recently, I earned my meditation certification after a two-year program to support clients through high-stress transitions. I've dedicated my life to learning and teaching the art of relationship-building—and now, I'm back with strategies that give you the edge in this brutal job market.

Listen, if you're a serious marketing executive ready to stop getting ghosted and land your dream $150K+ role—or boost your income by 25%—I'm here to help. I'm enrolling a max of 10 ambitious marketing leaders into my 9-week group coaching program, starting this Sunday, March 9, 2025. It's a 2-week risk-free trial, and if you join by March 31st, I'll personally rewrite your resume or LinkedIn profile for free—that's a $1,500 value.

Book a 15-minute job search fit session with me today at www.melissallarena.com/sessions. I've got tons of slots open in the next 48-hours, and I'd love to see if this is the right fit for you—or anyone you know who's frustrated with their boss, worried about layoffs, stalled on promotions, or feeling stuck. Let's turn your career into the success story it's meant to be. I'm Melissa Llarena, and I can't wait to help you win.

A client was on a sinking ship in the energy sector and here's what she said about our partnership....

From A Sinking Ship Company in The Energy Sector To A Remote Strategic Partnerships Role In A Top Tier Business School

I did get the offer as you know = great result!! The back-and-forth collaboration on interview questions and answers was powerful for me. I liked that you kept me accountable. I would have dragged my feet a lot longer. By investing in coaching this made me cut through my excuses and motivated me to go above and beyond by preparing for an interview 10x more than what I have ever done before. I got my dream job and the hiring manager told me how impressed everyone was and how my performance was heads above the other candidates who were MORE experienced in the function. My work is quite fun. It's rewarding work, fantastic people, ramping up some new skills and the lifestyle is to die for. Thank you, Melissa for our partnership."

A 20+ year communications professional's message about what it takes to land a dream marketing job - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe7otOG-i8Y

A former Volvo employee in China lands a role in the U.S. making more money than the role originally called for - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2vmjc0cTcg

A former tech executive who landed in a non-profit YET got a bump in pay - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jswvB9Km6J4

Let's hop on a 15-minute job search fit call today: https://www.melissallarena.com/sessions/

SHARE this episode with your family and friends who are currently in the job market or they keep telling you they should be out there hunting. Until next Tuesday…

Imagine crushing your biggest business goal in just 30 days—without the burnout or mom guilt. What if you could get a $3K coaching program for free, designed exclusively for mom entrepreneurs like you? In this episode, Melissa Llarena, #1 Amazon bestselling author and mom of three, unveils an exclusive pilot program you won't want to miss—but only if you act by Friday!

What You'll Discover:

• How 15 established business-owning moms can join Melissa's 30-Day Mompreneur Momentum Sprint—a $3,000 value, 100% free (this time only!).

• The secret sauce: a 30-Day Momentum Planner to laser-focus your energy, 22 live Q&A sessions (March 3-April 1, M-F 1pm CST), plus imagination tools, mindfulness hacks, and sales strategies tailored for moms.

• Why Jessica, a fellow mom, raves: "It infuses play and creativity while keeping it real about mom life and self-care."

• The catch? Only 15 spots, and the application deadline is February 28, 2025, 5pm Central.

How to Apply: Head to https://bit.ly/fertilecohort now. Fill out the short app on the left (name, email, website, 50 words on why you're a fit). You'll get the planner just for applying, and if selected, next steps on March 1st. Don't wait—spots are limited!

Who's This For? Mom business owners ready to level up, craving accountability, and done grinding alone. Not for the toe-dippers—this is for the committed.

Take Action: Apply by Friday at https://bit.ly/fertilecohort. By April 1st, you could have real progress on your biggest goal—calmer, recharged, and guilt-free. Go now!

**** Mompreneur Business coaching for moms Free coaching program 30-day business sprint Mom entrepreneur Business goals for moms Accountability for entrepreneurs Mindfulness for business owners Sales strategies for moms Melissa Llarena Mom Founder Imagination Hub Fertile Imagination Business planner for moms Cohort for mom entrepreneurs Application deadline February 28, 2025

How do toys shape who we become? Today, I sit down with a fascinating toy historian Chris Byrne who reveals the hidden power of play - from how different toys develop everything from relationship skills to problem - solving abilities.

We explore why true play isn't about reaching an end goal, but about embracing the pure joy of the journey. Whether you're looking to understand the art of playing alongside your kids or giving them space to explore independently, this episode will transform how you think about playtime. Join us for a rich conversation about rediscovering the magic that happens when we give ourselves permission to simply play.

After exploring the art of play with our toy historian today, I want to share something powerful with you. My book Fertile Imagination tackles a crucial truth: we can't guide our children toward imagination if we've lost touch with our own. I'll show you the exact framework I used to reawaken and strengthen this superpower – the same one that transformed both my life and my three sons'. If you're ready to rediscover your creativity and childlike zest for life, grab your copy now: https://bit.ly/fertilebook

In this episode, you will hear:

• Play is a process, not a means to an end, and embracing it can reduce stress.

• Imagination influences every decision we make.

• Playing with toys helps kids develop problem-solving and relationship skills.

• Adults benefit from play too—it fosters creativity, joy, and innovation.

• Letting children lead playtime strengthens their confidence and creativity.

• Kids learn by doing, and unstructured play is vital for their development.

• In corporate settings, a playful mindset can unlock new ideas and innovation.

• Fear of failure limits creativity—kids don't judge play, and neither should we.

This episode is brought to you by:

Fertile Imagination: A Guide For Stretching Every Mom's Superpower For Maximum Impact – My book is available as a hard cover, paperback, and also as an audiobook. If you are on the go and wish to quickly jot down where you can purchase the book then head to: https://bit.ly/fertilebook.

If however you want to grab the audio version then head to the show notes to click the direct Amazon link: https://www.amazon.com/Fertile-Imagination-Stretching-Superpower-Maximum/dp/B0CK2ZSMLB

About Chris Bryne

Chris Byrne has spent over 35 years in the toy industry, holding major marketing and creative roles before launching Byrne Communications, a consultancy specializing in product development, strategic planning, and marketing. A passionate advocate for the power of play, he has studied its impact on child development and creativity across industries. He has appeared on major media outlets worldwide, sharing insights on toys, play, and innovation. He also co-hosts The Playground Podcast, diving deep into the toy industry's past, present, and future.

SHARE this episode with fellow moms and entrepreneurs who want to bring more creativity into their lives! Chris's insights on play, imagination, and innovation are a must-listen for anyone balancing motherhood and career growth. Let's embrace play, rediscover joy, and inspire the next generation!

Supporting Resources:

Website: https://www.thetoyguy.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetoyguy/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thetoyguyofficial/

The Playground Podcast: Spotify & Apple Podcasts

Subscribe and Review

Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet.

I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms.

About Fertile Imagination

You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert!

In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination!

Advance Praise

"You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator

"Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money

"This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX

TRANSCRIPT

00:00:00 Chris: I really believe is what we play with as kids really becomes, we become a lot of that. And we had a basement in our house that had a room in it, that had a window in it. And my brothers and I would create puppet shows. And we would do that. And we would just go round up all the kids in the neighborhood and say, you have to watch this puppet show. And they did. I mean, they were good. But it was really about storytelling. It was about connection. It was about making things up and just feeling very alive in that moment, feeling very connected to who I was at that time and being able to share that with other people.

00:00:43 Melissa: Welcome to the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, your weekly podcast to inspire you to dream bigger. Plan out how you're going to get to that next level in business, find the energy to keep going, and make sure your creative juices are flowing so that this way you get what you really want rather than having to settle. Get ready to discover how mom founders have reimagined entrepreneurship and motherhood. Ever wonder how they do it? Tune in to find out.

00:01:09 Melissa: And stretch yourself by also learning from diverse entrepreneurs who might not be moms, but who have lessons you can tailor about how you can disrupt industries and step way outside of your comfort zone. I believe every mom's superpower is her imagination. In this podcast, I'm gonna give you the mindset, methods, and tools to unleash yours. Sounds good? Then keep listening.

00:01:36 Melissa: So how do toys shape who we become? Have you ever asked yourself that question as you are giving your child a toy? If that toy is going to influence their career choices ahead or the way that they are, their character. Today, I sat down with a fascinating toy historian, Chris Byrne.

00:02:04 Melissa: Now he is a 35 year plus veteran of the toy industry. He's held major marketing and creative positions earlier in his life. And he's appeared on TV talking about toys and play in the US and around the world. He's even been on the Live with Kelly and Mark show as a regular guest. And he has his own podcast, by the way, the Playground Podcast.

00:02:29 Melissa: So, Chris reveals today the hidden power of play, from how different toys develop everything from relationship skills to problem-solving abilities. We also explore why true play isn't about reaching an end goal, it's about embracing the pure joy of the journey. So, whether you're looking to understand the art of playing alongside your kids or giving them some space to explore independently, this episode is going to change how you think about playtime. So I encourage you to join us for this rich conversation about rediscovering the magic that happens when we give ourselves permission to just play.

00:03:10 Melissa: Okay, so before we jump into the conversation, I wanna just let you know that after the conversation, I would invite you to explore the art of play with my book, Fertile Imagination. Why is that relevant to you as a mom? Here's what I want you to know. It's really hard to guide our kids toward imagination if we've secretly lost touch with our own. So in my book, Fertile Imagination, I share with you the exact framework that I used in order to reawaken my imagination, play with my imagination, stretch my imagination, and strengthen what I believe to be our greatest superpower.

00:03:56 Melissa: So this framework is super simple to follow. It is guided and it is also provided in lots of really cool journaling question prompts in the book. And it's gonna be the same exact process that I used in order to really get back in touch with that little childlike spirit that all of us has, but maybe we forgot we have held quite tightly close to our hearts.

00:04:22 Melissa: So, I invite you to go ahead, rediscover your creativity, and see if you can find your childlike zest for life. Because I really believe that it's hard to teach our kids things that we may have forgotten are natural to us, and maybe came naturally to us when we were younger. So enjoy the conversation. The link to the book is available in the show notes where you're listening to this. Let me read the actual link so that you can learn more about my book, Fertile Imagination.

00:04:53 Melissa: It is a bit.ly link. So it is bit.ly/fertilebook. You can absolutely grab a copy right there of Fertile Imagination. If you wanted the audio version that is available exclusively via Amazon. So go ahead and check out the show notes for that link. Thank you again. And I hope you enjoy the conversation and let me know what you think at the end, I will share with you my top three takeaways that you can apply to your immediate mom life. Thank you so much.

00:05:28 Melissa: Chris Byrne. I am so excited to have you here on the Mom Founder Imagination Hub. How are you?

00:05:35 Chris: I am very well. I'm so excited to be with you. Thank you so much for the invitation.

00:05:40 Melissa: I couldn't get enough of your TED Talk. I was like, oh my gosh, he's not just a toy historian. He's like a toy psychologist. I loved it. I loved it. So welcome to the show. Chris, I want to just start with the big, big question on my mind. Help me understand from your perspective, decades in the industry, learning about the art of play, like what is an imagination to you and do you consider it a superpower?

00:06:12 Chris: Well, I absolutely consider our imagination our superpower. It is the one thing that, really one of the many things that really define us as human beings. Nothing happens in our world that doesn't start in the imagination. It can be, what do I want for lunch? Or what do I want to be when I grow up? Or should I marry this person? Or should I have children?

00:06:34 Chris: Or whatever it is because we begin in the imagination and other kinds of animals, you just put food in front of them and they eat, it's instinctual. But for us, it's not- as humans, it's not just instinctual. We literally create our worlds on a daily basis and that starts in the imagination.

00:06:54 Melissa: I agree. And it's interesting because as a fully grown adult, I would say that when I was writing my book, Fertile Imagination, and I see it as like a superpower for moms who are technically adults. I feel like it's a topic that is seldom discussed amongst adults. Like, is this something that you are noticing? Or maybe, you know, people that have that childlike quality because of your industry? What's your take on imagination, the art of play, and being an adult?

00:07:30 Chris: Well, I think all of those are really critical to who we are, because play is really the act of asking a question, what if? What if I do this? What if I, you know, as an adult in can be, what if do whatever? For me, as a kid is like, what if I jump off this wall? What's gonna happen? You know, but we grow up and we have a little bit more, more adult kind of perceptions, if you will, for that. And it really is like trying to spin out a scenario.

00:08:06 Chris: So if I am going to take a new job, for example, what is that gonna be like? Who am I gonna be working with? And we begin to develop stories around things in our imagination. And those stories are very important because we really can't take action to make things real until we've imagined them as a concept.

00:08:28 Melissa: Yeah. And so, okay. So this is something that I'm struggling with right now. This is like real time, I need some help, get me unclogged sort of stuff. So this idea of having a story in my mind and having a vision I want to make real, the vision side of it is so hard right now for me to see, mainly because it's like, there's things that I've envisioned in the past, but I haven't made happen. So I don't know kind of like how to play myself to a solution or a vision or just kind of like, think with a little less of like the past, you know, like hindering this vision.

00:09:15 Chris: Right. It's a great, it's a great thing. I mean, I'm sorry you're going through that, but I think that if you look at how a child plays, right, when they get an idea and they don't sit there and think, well, if I just do this or I do this or I do that, it's going to be fun, right? They come, that's not fun. I'm done. I'm on to the next thing. And I think as adults, we should do that too. If something is becoming too much effort, if it's not working, then we just drop it and go on to the next thing.

00:09:47 Chris: And I don't think there's any harm or foul in that. And I think that when you look at a kid who is imagining and playing, they're not judging the play as they're doing it. They're looking at well, where did this take me and where should I go next from it? And it's a much freer, kind of more peaceful way to go through the world.

00:10:08 Chris: I mean, I talk about things that I've done that turned out to be mistakes. And I call them I said, well, that was a once in a lifetime experience. As in I don't have to do that again. I learned the lesson.

00:10:20 Melissa: Yeah. And I think, you know, approaching any problem from that perspective releases that pressure to get it right the first time. And it gives you like the levity to get back up and just be like, okay, let's go at it again. And I imagine like, cause I noticed also, and I know that this side of it might be a little bit more conventional thinking, but like, you actually bring these ideas into corporate settings, you know, the art of play.

00:10:51 Melissa: And I'm like, if I think about the different environments where it's not okay to play. It's not okay to make mistakes. Like how do you sell that idea of we're just playing right now and don't get frustrated if it works or not in like a corporate setting, you know?

00:11:11 Chris: Well, one of the things that's so interesting in a corporate setting is people come into a meeting or a brainstorming and they're focused on one specific outcome, right? So if you're focused on an outcome, you kind of end-run the process of play because play is a process. Play is asking, what if, you know, let's go down this road and let's go down this road and see what it is. So I always encourage people to be as off the wall as possible. I will give you an example that almost got me fired.

00:11:43 Melissa: This is a good one, okay.

00:11:44 Chris: And nobody will like it, but I was working with Ideal, with Ideal Toy Company and we had the Shirley Temple doll. And nobody, we had these porcelain $400 Shirley Temple dolls and Shirley Temple dolls were huge in the '30s and still with doll collectors, but nobody was buying them. And we thought, how do we get rid of them? And I said, well, why don't we put them on the QE2 and use them as skeet? Like people can launch the doll.

00:12:11 Chris: So the brand manager got really mad at me. And told me I was inappropriate. But as we talked more, we ended up doing a doll collecting event with Cunard that actually turned out to be good. So the idea is, go out there and play off the wall in a safe environment, obviously. So the idea of creating an environment where it's safe to play, where it's safe to have that sort of impulsive childish response to a situation is okay.

00:12:45 Chris: We would never have promoted that in a corporate sense. But the idea that we were just playing with ideas and being silly. That opens the pathway to being really creative and to seeing what could actually work. And then once you get that, you put the action steps in place to get to the next step.

00:13:05 Melissa: Yeah, I think just, you know, going crazy and just really trying to break out of conventional thinking and our very logical pathways in our mind, it's like first we do this, that, the other. It's almost like some sentences, right? And the way we like greet each other, it's so like rehearsed that to come up with something like, oh my gosh, I love your outfit. You know, it reminds me of like a toy soldier or something. It would be like way off, but it would start rapport, I think. Rapport or like, you know, people would be like, kind of weirded out. But I've always tried that. How can I not weird people out?

00:13:44 Chris: Well, it's, right, well, that's always a question, but I don't really worry about that too much. But I think that one of the things, again, as I was saying about process, but also getting over fear, right? As adults, we think, well, what if I get it wrong? Children, when they play, if you watch them play, they don't worry about getting it wrong. They just think, well, that didn't work. That didn't do what I wanted it to do. Let me do something else. They haven't built a hierarchy of judgment and really being unkind to themselves about doing something wrong.

00:14:19 Chris: And if you embrace play, there's really no kind of, you can't be wrong when you're playing, right? Some things may be practical, but there's imagination and there's spinning things out, things that might never become real, but then things that actually could practically become real. And the process of getting to that point is actually pretty joyful.

00:14:42 Melissa: And I think we could all use some more joy these days, that's for sure. Adults and children alike. So let's see, let's go back in time. So let's go back to the time where you recall maybe playing with a toy and feeling like an insane amount of joy. If you can think about, you know, your one moment or one of the moments, I'm curious to hear your perspective.

00:15:06 Chris: Well, it's really interesting because one of the things that I really believe is what we play with as kids really becomes, we become a lot of that. And we had a basement in our house that had a room in it. They had a window in it. And my brothers and I would create puppet shows. And we would do that. And we would just go round up all the kids in the neighborhood and say, you have to watch this puppet show. And they did. They were good. But it was really about storytelling. It was about connection. It was about making things up and just feeling very alive in that moment, feeling very connected to who I was at that time and being able to share that with other people.

00:15:52 Melissa: Wow, so that's interesting. So it's funny because I feel like maybe I was, because I was an only child for most of my upbringing, like a lot of the things I did were just on my own and I had to really figure out how to make something out of what was around me. So let me share like this one thing that I would do to just pass the time. And of course, like in the background, like there was like maybe Magnum P.I. playing or, you know, name- Hawaii Five-0, whatever my mom was into.

00:16:25 Melissa: So I would go to the closet and I would take out a shoebox. And I would proceed to create like a scene. So they're called dioramas. I looked it up because I was like, this is a weird thing that I just kept doing all the time. And then I would create little figurines and put like little slots, you know, on the sides and move the little carboards in and out, you know. And I was like, okay, I have to ask Chris, like, what does that say about me? I have no idea.

00:16:56 Chris: Well, I mean, I would say it sort of starts you as a storyteller, which is what you're doing today. You're telling stories and you're facilitating other people telling stories. But it's also, I mean, especially for children at that age, it's about trying to make sense of the world and the stories they tell us, like trying to make sense of relationships. I'll tell you another story.

00:17:18 Chris: Years ago, we were playing with some kids with Barbie dolls. And they had all these different Barbie dolls. And one kid took all the blonde Barbie dolls and they were making fun of the brunette Barbie doll. And we were just watching this and going, yeah, this is somebody who is working out a reality in their life.

00:17:38 Chris: And that is really what play is, because even as she, in this case it was a girl, became powerful in that situation, was able to stand up for herself, you're giving your brain the sense that you can actually do this. If you do it vicariously, you've already had that experience on some level. So that when you confront that in real life, it might be easier, or you might have a solution.

00:18:03 Chris: I mean, how many times do you go into a situation, an interview or whatever, and you've rehearsed what you're gonna say? And your brain already knows that. It's like visual, what they talk about in sports about visualizing, you know, the outcome. You know, you're already having that experience, which is so cool. Cause our brain doesn't know the difference sometimes between reality and what we imagine.

00:18:24 Melissa: I love that. I love that. And so, yeah, who knows what I was trying to work out? There are a lot of things going on in my home. I'll tell you that much. But yeah, I think, you know, that idea though, just like trying to work things out that, you know, maybe you don't have that first person experience with, but like doing it through the use of a toy. Have you noticed at a curiosity any sort of changes with the dynamics between toys and kids now that there's like AI sort of toys out there?

00:19:01 Chris: There are so many different types of play experiences. What we were just talking about is more traditional doll or action figure or stuffed animal kind of play where a child is really doing that. Some of the other stuff with AI or licensed space like Star Wars, Marvel, all of that is beginning to understand yourself as a capable human being.

00:19:23 Chris: So for example, if I'm a superhero, I can feel. I can have the feeling of what it's like to be a superhero. And I always say, if your life is all about mom is in control, eat your peas, get in the minivan, do your homework, suddenly if you're a superhero, that's very empowering. And then empowering as an individual to be able to confront the world in a different way because you're empowered. So it's very classical, the kind of totemistic idea that we take on the powers of the superheroes.

00:19:59 Chris: And even though we're not gonna fly, we're not gonna lift, we're not gonna pick up a truck, we're not gonna do that, you have the emotional sense of capability, which is really what it's all about.

00:20:10 Melissa: That's interesting. I think, I mean, I don't know. Now that I think about my kids, for example, their toy experiences these days is really YouTube videos and playing video games and things like that. And I wonder if that's also along the same thread of what you just said, feeling the different capabilities like running fast or jumping high, things like that.

00:20:37 Chris: I think definitely. I mean, it's, you know, YouTube videos are like today's cartoons, right, on some level. You know, I grew up watching cartoons and, and it was- so they're looking at who are my role models and who are, you know, somebody's doing something. Oh, I'd like to try that. And, you know, or oh, wow, they tried that, I'm not gonna do that, but what would it be like if I did this kind of thing?

00:21:03 Chris: So I think that it's a window on the world and people are always concerned about screen time and I'm never concerned about screen time so much as I'm concerned about what's on the screen. So that is what's being modeled through the YouTube things, things that you as a mom or a parent want your child to be consuming because it can be very supportive or it can be kind of dangerous depending on what kids have access to.

00:21:30 Melissa: Yeah. And it's so interesting what you're sharing right now, because I mean, I had Saturday morning cartoons, for example, and I ate a lot of cereals with all the dyes and all these other things. And my kids literally tell me, they're like, oh, we want to have Saturday morning cartoons just like you. But of course, it is that YouTube thing. And I limit it to SpongeBob. Like, that's appropriate for their ages right now.

00:21:54 Melissa: But I think that's so interesting, this whole idea of rehearsal and visualization and imagination. I wonder because when it comes to toys and just the way that they've changed through the years, how did, for example, Tickle Me Elmo, how did that support people in terms of capabilities or anything? I'm curious.

00:22:22 Chris: Well, Tickle Me Elmo was kind of an outlier in that, you know, in terms of classical play. Tickle Me Elmo became a fad, right? And fads take on a life of their own. They kind of jump the shark or jump from the toy industry because Tickle Me Elmo started as an entertaining little preschool doll for preschoolers, infants and preschoolers. Suddenly it becomes this whole cultural phenomenon that everybody has to have.

00:22:50 Chris: It becomes, so it's a fad, so it becomes kind of a marker in time. So if you were around for Tickle Me Elmo, and you remember that, it's sort of a springboard to your memories of what the latter part of 1996 was about, because that's when Tickle Me Elmo was really huge. So that's not really kind of play in the way that I talk about it a lot. That becomes a cultural event. And my other joke about Tickle Me Elmo, Tickle Me Elmo was $40 really, basically, or more. You know, you can have a Tickle Me Elmo and be really cool for a lot less than you can have a Birkin bag.

00:23:26 Melissa: Wow, yeah, that's true. That is true. It's so funny, this conversation just takes me down the whole nostalgic route. Like I'm thinking about my Steve Urkel joke pull doll. Do you remember that one?

00:23:39 Chris: Yeah, yeah, of course.

00:23:41 Melissa: Yeah, so anyways, I'm totally like aging myself right now. I'm like, oh, I had Steve Urkel and I had Popples and all the like. What do you think, you know, nostalgia? Let's talk about that. Because I feel like a lot of marketers use that, you know, in order to kind of like pull forth a certain generation, let's say. And I even feel like at a supermarket, like I'm like, I think they know who their shoppers are with the music. But let's talk about nostalgia.

00:24:09 Melissa: Like, and again, thinking about more quote unquote modern toys, you know, like. And back to like these like electronics, like do you think that it'll be the same sort of calling card, I think is the right phrase? Like when someone starts saying, oh, like, let's say 10 years from now, you know, what's the name of the- Stumble Guys? Like, do you think that people will say like a certain like thing on video games and it'll have the same emotional pull as like Tickle Me Elmo, Popples, or Cabbage Patch?

00:24:41 Chris: It's hard to know. The thing about nostalgia is it's really for adults, right? Nostalgia is for people looking back. When you're three and four, you're not nostalgic for much. You're not remembering much. Maybe you remember your pull ups, right? When you had your pull ups. But you don't, you're not really nostalgic for something because you haven't been around that much.

00:25:03 Chris: The challenge from a toy marketing standpoint is relying on nostalgia to sell toys. Because I mean, yes, there's a certain level of you as a mom had My Little Pony or Littlest Pet Shop or any of those huge hits, Masters of the Universe. And you want to share those with your child. But for it to engage your child's imagination, there has to be something authentic to them. It's not just, mom liked this, so I'm going to like it too. That doesn't really work.

00:25:31 Chris: Look at Barbie and how Barbie's been redefined over the years, because Barbie always reflects the culture at any given time. So in 1959, she could be a fashion model or a bride, right? Pretty much, those are the Barbie options. Today, there are hundreds of careers and there's hundreds of abilities. And Barbie, the Barbie line looks like the world kids are growing up in, just as it did in 1959. It's just a more diverse and broader world with more possibility for girls and women today than it was in 1959.

00:26:08 Melissa: So when it comes to the toy industry, who's actually using their imagination to come up with like what to make for the future? Like, is it a combination of kids and adults? Is it like who's actually imagining like right now, like in the Mattels, et cetera, you know, what's coming down the line like 10 years from now? It's going to be hot and cool. And like, how do you how do you imagine something like that?

00:26:36 Chris: Well, it's hard. I mean, I think I think it's like, you know, my crystal ball usually needs a shot of Windex so I could get a clearer sense. But it's more an art than a science, that's for sure. And it's looking at trends. It's looking at how are kids playing, how are they interacting, how are they socializing, what is fun to them, and what's going on in the culture at large. Because the toy industry always reflects the culture.

00:27:03 Chris: We're always reflecting, because kids, you know, most healthy kids, they aspire to being big. They wanna grow up and they want the things like their parents have. So back in the, you know, in the early 2000s when cell phones came out, you saw tons of preschool cell phones, right? You don't see that so much anymore because the preschoolers have a real cellphone.

00:27:25 Chris: But you see things that will allow them to feel like they are part of the culture and they are growing up into it and that they are older and perhaps more capable than they really are because that's an important imaginative tool to help in the maturation process.

00:27:41 Melissa: That's fascinating. So that's true. It was definitely a lot of like, I don't know, mommy and me things. Like you see them with like a cash register or like a Target cart, right? The plastic little one, right? Cause their parent is shopping at Target. And so I wonder because it's like, there's some habits that as a parent, like maybe we wanna shake off ourselves, but we're inadvertently doing a lot.

00:28:06 Melissa: So like the cellphone one, I'm like, oh God, yeah, mommy has a cellphone and now her child does too. And it's like, how can I stop? And it's a reinforcement, but I'm wondering, okay, so in terms of the future and in terms of toys, have you ever done or seen any sort of things where the mom was playing with the child versus the child was playing by themselves? Like any differences there?

00:28:31 Melissa: Because I would love to just kind of inspire a listener right now to consider the fact that actually getting lost in play with their child can be even more beneficial than just having your child play with a toy to the side and you're doing something completely different.

00:28:52 Chris: I think that is critically important. One of the things that we're talking to parents of Gen Z and Gen Alpha kids. And Gen Alpha was born 2010 to this year. And one of the things that parents talk about is some of the best part of their day is when they're playing with kids. And what I always suggest is that if you're playing with your kid, especially if they're a preschooler, let the child run the play and you respond. Don't tell them, oh, look at this, oh, do that.

00:29:24 Chris: And you don't have to teach, it doesn't have to teach them anything, right? It doesn't have to teach. Kids are going to learn. So really letting that child's imagination drive the experience because, you know, I think every parent has had the experience where your child comes up with something and you go where did that come from?

00:29:45 Melissa: 100%. All the time.

00:29:47 Chris: And it's because they're sponges and they're listening to their absorbing everything and then they're processing it to their childlike brains or their childish brains. So I think that letting the child do that, but being there and being in communication is really important.

00:30:02 Chris: When I was growing up and maybe when you were too, we had three different worlds. We had kid world where no adults came in and the kids were doing that. We had adult world where we weren't allowed, where the parents would do that. And then there was family world, which is dinner and vacations and being yelled at about your grades or whatever that was.

00:30:21 Chris: But those three worlds don't really seem to exist anymore. And parents and kids are much more integrated in one another's lives. I think that's an outcome of COVID. It's actually a very positive outcome from COVID. Because you as mom and dad, have fun with your kids. Come on. It's, again, back to the idea of process rather than outcome. They don't have to become an expert ball player. They don't have to become an expert thing at times. They can actually just learn and play and discover the world and share those discoveries with you.

00:30:51 Melissa: Yeah, I love that. And I think it's an opportunity for someone that has to think a lot in life and feels the stresses of life to kind of let go and just stop thinking and just going with what is. Be present. You know, be totally present.

00:31:12 Chris: Be totally present and just be open to what it is. It's trying not to, as I was saying, it doesn't have to have a definitive outcome. And the one thing I think we've lost track of, often in our culture right now, is the idea of embracing process. It's really okay to make mistakes. It's really okay to try something, as long as you get up and start again.

00:31:36 Chris: I mean, how many times have you, I was talking about, for me, I learned to ski late. And I'm a really mediocre skier. I'm enthusiastic, but I'm not good. And I had somebody who was teaching me and he said, Chris, eventually I was scared. Eventually you're gonna have to point your skis down the hill. So I did it, I fell a lot, I did that, but I was so eager to learn that I'd fall and get up again.

00:32:04 Chris: I had to learn how to get up, but that's the thing that I think is, you know, if you have an idea of where you'd like to go but embrace the process on the way there because who knows what you're going to learn and what you're going to discover.

00:32:16 Melissa: Yeah, I definitely agree with that. I think that's the key to any goal. It's just you have to really fall in love with the process as you head towards the vision the goal, you know, whatever it is that you're trying to accomplish. And I also love the fact that, you know, as with play it's like there's something that's so pure about it, you know, when left on unmanipulated.

00:32:40 Melissa: It's like as a parent, we might have this desire to like educate our kids up to wazoo with regards to like every educational toy out there and every moment with we're with them, we're teaching them another language or coding or something. But I think, you know, just being open to a little bit, you know, unstructured play and that time with your child has so many benefits. And I think, you know, Chris, the work that you're doing just stay connected to like play as just being fun and okay and positive is is really helpful. Thank you so much for the work that you've done.

00:33:18 Chris: Thanks. I mean, I really do think that it as I mentioned, joy before it really does open the door to being joyful and going, oh, wow, that's fun, you know? I mean, when was the last time you said, oh, wow, that's really fun.

00:33:31 Melissa: 100%. Yeah, for sure. Thank you so much, Chris. So where can listeners continue to learn about their favorite toys, about you, about what's up ahead in the toy industry?

00:33:42 Chris: You can come see the toyguy.com. That's probably the best way. And then on Instagram, I'm thetoyguy. So, yeah. And I post a lot of pictures from things like toy fairs and different things and things that are fun for me and that make me giggle.

00:33:58 Melissa: Thank you so much, Chris. Have an awesome one.

00:34:01 Chris: Thank you.

00:34:03 Melissa: My three takeaways for this conversation that you can absolutely take to the bank and apply in your home are, first, this idea that playing with our kids has benefits for our kids, but also for us, especially if you're a super busy mom. It helps put you in the immediate present moment. So that's a big, big perk right there.

00:34:25 Melissa: Second is this idea that it's all about the process as opposed to the final answer. And that's something that I know is hard to think about when you're constantly thinking about what's next in your life. So thinking about play as something that you're doing and it's a process instead of to put together that Lego piece might be a great shift in your thinking and could relieve you of the stress and pressure of getting things right.

00:34:54 Melissa: Second, no, actually my third point here, my third point would be that in terms of the benefits of playing, I hadn't realized how psychologically deep some of these toys touch the minds of our kids. So the simple fact that we are thinking about, you know, working out relationships when you're doing a diorama, which may have been the case for me personally or maybe you're thinking about whether or not you have skills like a superhero, which was something that Chris shared, I just never thought about how psychologically interesting playing with a toy could be.

00:35:32 Melissa: So you might want to reconsider this idea that playing with a toy is just a way to distract your child or keep them focused on something other than breaking things. There could be real psychological value and also something for you to just consider psychological opportunity when it comes to the choices behind the toys we put in front of our kids.

00:36:00 Melissa: So I hope you enjoyed this conversation. Again, this episode was brought to you by my book, Fertile Imagination. I am excited about it. It's a guide for stretching every mom's superpower for maximum impact. Your imagination is your superpower. That is why I had Chris on the show today. I encourage you to check out the show notes where you could actually purchase the book and let me know that you did. I am always available for conversation and any questions. Thank you so much and I appreciate you. And until next Tuesday.

My conversation with a non-profit CEO, a long-time mentor, recently turned to our dreams for our children. It began when she shared how her mother had praised her beautiful New Jersey home, which led her to reflect: "I'd want my kids to live in castles! I want them to have even more than I do."

Like any parent, I want my three sons to surpass me in every aspect of life—and even create new categories beyond AI to conquer!

However, I've realized my own limiting beliefs and stress responses could unknowingly cap their success if I don't consciously address them. For example, my fear of openly competing or declaring my ambition for first place—how can my sons confidently compete on a world stage if I haven't confronted this fear? Similarly, if we avoid networking because we fear rejection, can we effectively teach our children to build connections?

This is where our greatest opportunity for inter-generational impact lies: facing our own limitations so they don't become our children's inheritance.

My mother's primary concern was the potential inheritance of her manic depression. This fear led her to anxiously await my thirtieth birthday, believing symptoms would likely manifest before then if I were to inherit it. This sparked my curiosity about breaking the cycle of inherited limiting beliefs for my own sons. For thirteen years, as a mother, I've considered how to proactively guide my children toward success. I believe we can break negative cycles and cultivate a new model of success by nurturing their strengths, fostering healthy mindsets, and focusing on key skills like imagination, cross-cultural thinking, and resilience. This is about empowering our children from the start.

Generational patterns often include inherited personality traits, impacting education and career choices. Families frequently pass down expectations and lessons, often along gender lines. These inherited mindsets shape our understanding of what it means to be a girl or boy within our family. Children observe and adopt behaviors they perceive as normalized expectations. They may also be explicitly taught specific ways of thinking, especially in early childhood. Limiting beliefs can also be passed down. In my family, I observed a lack of desire or ability to ascend into leadership positions or gain mastery in a field. My mother, a secretary for corporate leaders, held a strong limiting belief that she lacked the intelligence to provide valuable recommendations. This idea was ingrained in me, driving my need for external validation in corporate settings. While this mindset sometimes helped me in corporate life, it didn't translate well into entrepreneurship. My mother's limiting belief was essentially a form of impostor syndrome.

Her lack of confidence stemmed from various factors. As a child, I mistakenly attributed it to her not having a four-year degree. She often mentioned her inability to finish her degree as a working mom. Yet, her illness and its constant disruptions likely caused her to question her ability to contribute meaningfully to leadership conversations. As a child, I simply saw her as a secretary supporting leaders. Our family felt inconsequential. This perception shifted when I met children from families who held positions of influence. I realized I needed to address this inherited limiting belief. Though young, caring for my mother fostered a sense of maturity, allowing me to envision a different future. I didn't want to simply play a supporting role.

So, where did I start? 1980s sitcoms like Who's the Boss? sparked my career aspirations. I wanted that life: Connecticut, business owner, advertising. Without a mentor, TV was my guide. Summers stamping travel brochures ignited my wanderlust. London, Singapore – the world felt attainable. My mom didn't travel, but I craved that broader experience. I knew life beyond my zip code held possibilities.

I worked with what I had: imagination. I had a career blueprint from fiction, then exposure to someone who explored globally my stepmother owned a travel agency. I realized following their path wouldn't be easy, but I had something they didn't teach on TV – resilience, inherited from my mom. I knew I could stumble, fall, and get back up.

Ultimately, I achieved that dream: Connecticut, Ogilvy & Mather, even Australia for 3.5 years. My podcast, The Mom Founder Imagination Hub, features conversations with world leaders. These realities weren't in my original blueprint, but resilience was my active ingredient. What's yours? If you want more for your kids, discover it.

Imagination, cross-cultural thinking, resilience – these are the tools to re-architect success for our kids. This is my parenting blueprint now. My sons will tweak it, of course; change demands it.

Let's focus on your kids, your blueprint, and overcoming challenges and limiting beliefs so they can achieve more than you did. How can you transform thoughts like, "I don't feel comfortable asking for money," "Getting on stage gives me anxiety," or "I hate competing" into lessons that build resilience? If you want your child to own a business but you've never had one, you'll need to address these areas of discomfort. Since these limiting beliefs are inherent in entrepreneurship, how can you use them to your advantage?

One way is to challenge yourself to ask for discounts in front of your kids, or challenge them to do it. I dared my kids to do this, letting them keep their savings. This tackles the "asking for money" hurdle. Public speaking anxiety? Bring your kids into the process. Share your fears and how you manage them. Have them brainstorm solutions. The goal is to expose them to the same challenges they'll face and show them how you move forward.

Age-appropriate conversations are key. For the discount example, include prep sessions where you brainstorm possible questions with your kids. They can choose from your list or create their own. ("Can I get a discount for paying cash?" "Is there a student discount?" "Is there a sale coming up?") For public speaking, articulate your worries simply: "Mommy feels yucky in her tummy because she's nervous about talking." This leverages mindfulness – acknowledging the physical sensations of anxiety – to start a conversation.

Here's A Blueprint Reframing Exercise

1. What is a dream you have for your child? (e.g., Living in a castle, owning their own business)

2. What qualities must they have to fulfill that dream?

3. Write out your analysis of whether your blueprint offers those qualities. Pick out the ones that are in direct contrast to what your child will need.

Example

1. You never want your kid to work for a boss in a big corporate company.

2. You know that working for a startup or building one requires the ability to build relationships.

3. You love talking about real-life with your mom friends. You adore helping people. You are a connector. However, you do not like asking for help or asking for intros or turning friendships into professional relationships.

4. Here's an opportunity to work on your limiting belief so that it doesn't get in your kid's way later on: turn a Saturday soccer practice conversation into a business one in front of your kids ideally.

I'm not asking you to do anything I have not already done. During my sons' soccer match I turned a personal friendship into a professional partnership because I took interest in the careers of the moms around me. The same applies for our kids. Yes, in school they might have project-based work but what about in other realms of life from church to sports to music. Give the kids a chance to build personal relationships that can translate into a professional objective outside of their scenarios.

The thinking behind this intentional thinking on your limiting belief not being your kid's limiting beliefs is worthwhile because our minds are flexible. According to Carol Dweck you can change your thinking and as a mother doing this in front of your kids gives your kids a real shot at having what you didn't have due in part to that limiting belief. Take for example one of my clients who is the co-founder of a non-profit that has brought in millions in donations. She recently decided to sing in front of an audience after years of feeling frivolous for doing such things. Her son might be under ten but now his mom has not only expressed herself after years of hiding this personal love of hers but also provided an example to her son of what a woman putting herself out there looks like. Imagine this mom talking to her son ten years from now when he wants to do something silly like be in a band or launch a YouTube channel featuring his own videogames. This conversation will sound very different because his mom now went through every emotion under the sun to get on stage and figured out how to navigate them in a similar way. Can you see how this guidance will sound totally differently once informed by your own evidence vs. a wish for your kids that you didn't have the chutzpah to go first? The same goes for a mom who would love her kids to live abroad but never got over her fear of living in a land where she doesn't know anyone or perhaps the language. Sure our kids might be daring whereas we never were but the potential is greater if you went first. You'd be the perfect coach and in instances where you wouldn't be the right coach then you can always ask the world for help – that's again where ideas can come from anywhere even outside of your home country.

There are many ways to build a growth mindset in your kids. It starts with shifting praise from innate talent to effort, practice, and skill development. Instead of "Wow, you're a great reader," try "Wow, you're working really hard to get through those books." This shows kids they control their effort, which drives mastery. Here are some tangible examples of nurturing imagination, seeking diverse ideas, and building resilience:

· Imagination: Ask open-ended questions. After reading a book, ask your kids to imagine alternate endings. For example: "How might this book end differently?"

· Cross-cultural thinking: Explore YouTube. Instead of limiting content to your own culture, find channels featuring diverse ways of life and experiences.

· Resilience: Practice exploring weaknesses. While everyone enjoys winning, growth comes from discomfort. If your child isn't into sports, encourage them to try a competition. The goal isn't victory, but finishing the competition. The lesson: "You might dislike this sport, but you can still participate; your capacity is still valid."

A growth mindset, fueled by imagination, cross-cultural thinking, and resilience, helps children break free from inherited limitations and design their own blueprints. We must be honest about our own limitations, work on them, and model a different path for our kids. Then, give them opportunities to practice these new, empowering beliefs.

One blueprint does not fit all

Each child is unique. You could have three kids with three distinct dreams requiring different skills and beliefs. While it would be ideal to eliminate all your limiting beliefs, who has time for that? Instead, let your kids lead the way. Create environments for them to explore their ambitions at every age. Here I am taking a page from another culture...

In South Korea, there's a tradition called Doljanchi where a one year old child chooses from a selection of objects, supposedly indicating their future career. You can adapt this idea, but ultimately, be intensely curious about what your kids gravitate toward. If your child loves a Valentine's Day craft activity, you've discovered an interest. If they dislike it, note their preferences. This is valuable data. Want to introduce them to new cultures? Let them try Duolingo. Teaching resilience? Encourage them to ask their teacher to redo an assignment. Just asking takes bravery.

These ideas are age-dependent. Building these proficiencies varies with capacity. If you'd like more ideas tailored to specific age groups, just ask! You don't want to pass along limiting beliefs, and I'm here to help."

Your turn

"What one small step can you take today to break a negative cycle and empower your child's unique path to success – focusing on imagination, cross-cultural thinking, and resilience – and incorporate it into your evolving Fertile Imagination Blueprint?"

Ready to break the negative cycle and ignite your child's unique potential? Don't wait. Begin implementing these strategies today, and discover the power of fostering imagination, cross-cultural thinking, and resilience. My book, Fertile Imagination, offers a foundation, but personalized guidance can amplify your impact. Let's work together to craft a tailored education plan that empowers both you and your child.

Schedule a session at

www.melissallarena.com/sessions and let's build your family's blueprint for a vibrant, successful future. Only 5 Spots Left! Claim Your FREE Call + Educational Plan Before 2/14.

Melissa Llarena is an author, imagination coach, consultant, speaker, and contributor to ForbesWomen articles that have garnered 4 million + views. She is also the host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub, the podcast for entrepreneurs, founders, and creators who are also moms. Featured guests include GaryVee and Beth Comstock. Melissa holds a psychology degree from New York University, an MBA from the Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth, and a Transformational Coaching Academy certificate. She is also a certified meditation practitioner. Melissa lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and three sons. Visit www.fertileideas.com.

Let's find the good in experiencing stress so that you don't shortchange yourself out of its ability to instill inner confidence in your capabilities. We are focused on experiences such as birthing a baby, building a business, or navigating a everchanging workplace.

Just because someone else fell apart in any of those situations, it does not mean that you will too. It's unique to you, yet worth uncovering, because when you get to the other side of a stressful situation, if you embody at least one learning or lesson, then you will have increased your capacity to handle more stressful situations.

This comes in handy, as life often hands us stress at a pretty hot and heavy pace. In this article, we'll interweave the four noble truths along with personal stories that showcase the value of embracing stress rather than running away from it.

There have been so many occasions when I was told not to put so much pressure on myself, and it was out of those circumstances, where I didn't let their thinking impact mine, that I can now tell my greatest stories of defiance and delivery. A memorable such moment was during my first semester of law school. My mom told me this: 'Watch out, Melissa, and try not to experience too much stress.' She was giving me a fair warning based on her own sensitivities to stress. My mom has manic depression. A person with manic depression can be sent into an episode or spell by stress. While that guidance came from her experiences, it also came along with her tender concern for my mental health. My mental health, on the other hand, has proven sturdy, in great part because I've had ample opportunities to practice the art of experiencing stress.

Law school wasn't a moment of redemption, but it was the time I realized my limit. I'm glad I didn't listen to my mom, because then I wouldn't have discovered my kryptonite. We need to know our kryptonite and how to overcome it. Somehow, it was that combination of overwhelming debt and basing my self-worth on school grades that almost broke me. I got through that time mentally unscathed, thankfully, but intuitively, I knew it was close. There's a benefit to knowing how far you can go. That experience gave me the courage to finally pursue my dream career in advertising. Taking a pay cut didn't seem so bad when the alternative was six-figure debt and no income.

The trick is to always stay beneath that line. My self-publishing experience with Fertile Imagination pushed me to that limit. I had gotten my edited copy of my manuscript extremely late, and to compensate for that delay, I sat in my chair for twelve hours straight. The pressure I put on myself to finish the book was enormous. Around the twelfth hour, I felt a crack in my neck, which turned into a year of pain, physical therapy, and an MRI. Ever gotten an MRI? I've been through a lot, but somehow my anxiety was insane during that MRI, and my relationship with God has never been closer. It was like a church service in that cylinder. Yet, this was another opportunity to practice coexisting with stress. I don't regret that experience, and I know I learned from it. The other side of that stressful moment was completing my book and focusing on my physical health, a goal I'd been writing about for decades. Yet, somehow, I had to crash physically to finally pursue it.

In these two cases, I needed to experience these greater stresses to build the confidence and conviction necessary to believe I could endure the kind of stress it takes to go after what I've always wanted. What if the same is true for you? What if, rather than avoid stress, you walked right into it with a different perspective? What if you need that vote of confidence—knowing you can handle a ton of stress—to get the kind of laser focus necessary to finally jump into your greatest personal or professional adventure? What if you need to have something to say: 'Well, if I did that and didn't die, then I might as well go for this'? I want to share a new way to think about stress because it's the reality of being human. As a meditation practitioner, I thought I'd enlist the help of the four noble truths to help us see the profundity in otherwise stressful experiences. My meditation offerings are secular, yet I do think ancient wisdom has its place in stress management. It gives me comfort to know that my experiencing stress is not novel; it's normal and expected. So, let's turn to commonly held beliefs that we can anchor this conversation in—the four noble truths

Understanding the Four Noble Truths

The Four Noble Truths are fundamental to Buddhism and describe the nature of reality and the path to liberation. They are:

1. Dukkha: This is often translated as "suffering," but more accurately encompasses unsatisfactoriness, frustration, and the inherent impermanence of all things.

2. Samudaya: The origin or cause of dukkha, which is identified as craving, attachment, and aversion.

3. Nirodha: The cessation of dukkha, which is achieved through the elimination of craving and attachment.

4. Magga: The path leading to the cessation of dukkha, known as the Noble Eightfold Path, which encompasses right understanding, right thought, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness, and right concentration. 1

The Inescapability of Stress in Modern Life

You don't need to be a Buddhist to believe that being human means experiencing suffering. Just look around corporate America—you can see and feel it everywhere. According to Ohsa.gov, 83% of US workers suffer from work-related stress. You can be stressed about having, keeping, leaving, or getting a job. The sound of a ping can spike your cortisol levels. It doesn't take much to suffer these days. We experience a constant, low-grade level of stress or anxiety, and our baseline sensitivity to stress is very low. This comparison comes from the constant barrage of information we consume daily, which contributes to "sympathy stress," as well as the fact that many of us are openly struggling. This is why it's necessary to find a way to coexist with stress; it's inescapable.

A Yoga Analogy for Managing Pain

In my pre-natal yoga class with my firstborn, the teacher had us sit on our bent toes. Her rationale was to have us experience physical pain and, instead of running away, breathe through the stretch. Was this comparable to birthing any of my kids? Heck no! It was a way to introduce the idea of feeling pain and remaining still within that feeling. The teacher's approach was to increase our tolerance for the inevitable pain of childbirth. The pain of childbirth is inescapable. This toe stretch gave me a chance to imagine being with inescapable pain in a situation where I could escape. It's this intentional decision not to escape an escapable pain that builds confidence. You have the chance to escape discomfort, yet you wrangle your fears and push forward anyway. There's immense power in those moments. This is where your practice comes in, and how meditation can help you coexist in an empowered state amidst life's struggles. You can pause and breathe through life's emotional ups and downs instead of panicking and stopping the train.

The Second Noble Truth: Understanding Craving, Attachment, and Aversion

The second noble truth is Samudaya. It's the craving, attachment, or aversion to the feeling of stress. It's always a practice for me. As a business owner, it's easy to crave a consistent income or feel attached to maintaining a certain reputation. Aversions are real for us, too, such as my aversion to tech issues. Yet, my perpetual thoughts about these situations have gotten in my way. These situations are tough enough. By experiencing this second noble truth, I'm not doing myself any favors. This is why equanimity helps; it helps us focus on what's needed in the moment. I'll share an example in a bit. But first, let's turn this to you.

The Fear of Obsolescence in the Age of AI

Let's talk about craving for career permanence. Whether you are an entrepreneur or employee, this idea translates. The fear of becoming obsolete (FOBO) is rising among workers as AI advancements accelerate. A Gallup poll found that 22% of U.S. workers are concerned about their jobs becoming obsolete due to technology, and that figure is up from 2022. Imagine how freelance copywriters or coaches feel these days. Some feel like they are being promptly put out of business. The threat is real; however, thinking about the threat is stealing the time necessary to uplevel your skills or take actions to support your business. You are adding a layer of unnecessary suffering, draining your finite energy. AI is here, and so are you. How can you coexist with AI? This reminds me of those required college courses I didn't like. They were inescapable and boring. However, it was me who made them feel brutal when I procrastinated reading those ancient texts. Fast forward to today, and I can say that I had the same thoughts while completing some requirements for my meditation certification program.

Finding Peace in Meditation (and a Bird's Nest)

One week, I experienced a silent meditation in a house with three young boys and my husband. This was the kick-off to my meditation practitioner training. At the time, walking meditations were part of the daily experience, and I hated them. I'd pace in my yard, which was really boring. It reminded me of psych wards with outdoor spaces where I visited my mom. Sometimes she was in, and other times she was out. I felt a deep aversion to this mode of meditating. Yet, I had to do it a lot, so I opted to stare into the leaves of my trees instead of watching my pacing feet. You know what I realized? I saw a nest in the tree! This got me thinking about how I was a mama bird in a nest with my young. Noticing what was real—my breath and the nest—helped me. I smiled.

Navigating the AI Revolution: A Path to Coexistence (The Third and Fourth Noble Truths)

Stress is real, but suffering is optional. You can shift your thinking from whether you hate or love AI to saying to yourself, "AI is here. How can I co-exist with AI? Is there a right way for me to navigate AI? Might there be a right way to understand AI that can help me?" Once in the present, focused on the facts, you will experience the third noble truth, which is Nirodha. The path to this truth is called "magga," which is also the fourth noble truth and comprises several factors: right understanding, right thought, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness, and right concentration.

The eightfold path offers us an ideal way to coexist with stress. I haven't fully embodied it yet, but I feel as if each encounter with stress has given me a chance to practice it.

Lessons from a Car Accident: Embracing the "Rights"

Years ago, I experienced my first car accident. I was sitting in a parking lot in my new Honda minivan, waiting for my mom. A parked car, coming out of its spot, backed into my car. My minivan was perhaps months old, and this was my first accident. The other driver came out, shouting about how unnecessary the accident was. His wife quickly calmed him down, and then we exchanged information. I felt overwhelmed and wasn't thinking about Nirodha. I turned to my mom and said, "This shouldn't have happened! How can I get into an accident when I wasn't even moving?" She said, "Melissa, these things happen in life." Months later, I was in another accident in a parking lot, but I was moving this time. This second time felt different because I adopted my mom's wisdom. It was more manageable, and if we analyze it through the "rights," I'd say I had the right understanding. What if stressful situations are necessary to achieve all those "rights?" What if you're short-changing yourself by not increasing your stress management skills? I'd argue that this is true. I'm not suggesting you complicate your life, especially if it's already incredibly stressful. Instead, I'm urging you not to miss a life-giving moment where the gift is practicing the eightfold path. Once you see these as practices, you can teach your kids how to use stress for their benefit.

A Son's BJJ Tournament: Wrestling with Life's Challenges

This past weekend, one of my sons competed in a BJJ tournament. My eleven-year-old is not required to compete at that level. He could have competed at his local school. Yet, this isn't realistic to how we must compete in life for a job, medal, or resources. So, I encouraged him to compete, even though his first match was against someone who had previously won eleven times. Would you have done the same? Why would any mom allow that? Here's why: you will face outsized stresses in life, and these moments have allowed me to wrestle with the "rights." I got my greatest learnings and confidence from those hard bits of life. I don't win them all, but I've gained more "rights" along the way. Why would I cheat my son of that? So, he competed. I wanted him to take one lesson to the next match. For example, he was advised to stand up and not go straight for the legs in the second round. Did he do it? He tried, but it took the third round. That last round was unexpected. He was winded, tearful, red, and already out of his Gi. Was he going to do the fourth match? That third round, he gave it his all. There were hundreds of people looking at my kid.

This is where my life experiences helped us both. Recognizing that my son had had enough, I could relate to so many moments as a kid when I had had enough, and yet life doesn't always give you a choice to walk away. I knew that because I experienced that. I pushed my son to return to the mat that fourth time because this was the right action, and I know that these moments are additive to the stories we tell ourselves about what we are capable of. It shapes how my kid will think about his ability to handle humiliation, boos, competing, and training. It gives him a sense for what it takes to compete with people who have won. His capacity to handle stress was increased in that moment. Imagine facing someone who has won 11 times during your first tournament, then having to enter round after round, loss after loss? This translates to failing in school, in business, and in relationships. My son was practicing the "right concentration" four times more on the mat than off on a typical Saturday. He was wrestling with the "right thoughts" even more than that. These encounters can be fruitful. They contribute to a rich life that can make you invaluable in the life of someone else.

💬 What's one workplace stressor you've learned to co-exist with? Drop it in the comments—I bet others can relate! ⬇️

My Story – Melissa Llarena

I'm a meditation practitioner and #1 Amazon bestselling author who has spent years peering into the minds of marketers and executives, both as one of them and as their trusted guide. My articles in ForbesWomen have reached over 4 million readers, but what really lights me up is the deep work I do with people who, like me, have spent years shape-shifting to succeed.

My own journey through the corporate world – 10 years at powerhouses like Ogilvy (working on IBM) and P&G (yes, even Charmin!) – taught me firsthand about wearing different hats across 14+ business functions. For the past 13 years, I've had the privilege of coaching over 200 marketing and advertising executives worldwide, having raw, honest conversations about what it really costs us to morph ourselves every single day.

When I'm hosting the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, I get to dive deep with remarkable leaders like Beth Comstock and GaryVee, exploring how to tap into our most overlooked superpower: imagination. My psychology degree from NYU, Dartmouth MBA, and Transformational Coaching certification gave me the foundation, but it was the pandemic that showed me – and my clients – that we needed something more.

In 2021, when ambition felt impossible and imagination seemed out of reach, I realized we were all exhausted from trying to power through. That's when I took a leap – pausing my coaching practice to write a book filled with soul-searching questions, while earning my meditation certification from the Jack Kornfield organization.

Now, I blend all these pieces – my corporate insider experience, thousands of honest conversations, and meditation wisdom – into workshops, sessions, and immersions that truly connect. Using imaginative meditation, mindfulness practices that even the most restless executives love, and revealing journaling exercises, I help people find their way back to themselves. Because here's what I know: when we stop losing ourselves every time life or business throws us a curveball, we can finally use our energy for what really matters – creating the impact we're meant to make.

Introducing Mountain to Molehill: A Mindfulness and Meditation Newsletter

Mental Health Melissa Llarena

Why Stressed Professionals Quit Meditation (And How Not To)

Meditating is a good alternative to that third glass of wine at night – and might even serve as a replacement for psych meds for the most restless, stressed-out marketers, sales professionals, and ad executives dealing with the unpredictability of their virtual lives, workplace, home life, and everything else that gets logged in your head as stressful mountains to climb when in reality you're looking at a molehill you can simply hop over.

Q: Why did I write this article encouraging you to return to meditation instead of relying on quicker fixes for stress?

A: I know firsthand how psych meds play out. I've been an unwitting observer of a personal longitudinal study as the daughter of a mom who has been on them since 1982. My thinking is simple: if you can avoid them, do. I don't say this as a psychiatrist – I say it as a witness who has watched decades of science experiments performed on my single parent, from my toddler years through today, when the impact of this four-decade-long chemical warfare is irreversible.

This deeply personal experience is why I'm committed to my mental health, and why I believe adopting and keeping a meditation practice is a powerful approach to life's realities. A consistent practice will increase your capacity to bear any weight you may be carrying – something we all need, don't you agree?

Now, I know it's hard to adopt a practice from scratch, so I decided to focus on those of you who once meditated and might secretly wish to return. Let's start with the top reasons for this kind of "quiet" quitting. Notice the pun? I'll try to keep you chuckling throughout this read. But first, let's look at some serious stats...

According to the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine, approximately 60% of people who start a meditation practice discontinue within the first year. The primary reasons include:

1. Perceived lack of time

2. Difficulty maintaining consistent practice

3. Feeling they're "not doing it right"

4. Not seeing immediate results

Let's explore doable workarounds for these four reasons, considering our modern omnichannel lives. Interestingly, this study aligns perfectly with a recent LinkedIn survey I conducted, asking mid-career professionals what they wanted me to cover. Time emerged as the top concern, so let's start there.

Perceived Lack of Time

Let's talk about time – or the common excuse of not having enough of it. Let's dispel the idea that you're too busy to drop in and pay attention to your breath for five minutes a day. Where can you steal these five minutes? Let's start with the low-hanging fruit. According to the Harvard Business Review, professionals spend an average of 28% of their workweek managing email. That's about 3.1 hours per day reading, writing, and responding to emails, with an estimated 25% of those being unnecessary or unproductive.

Take my librarian email saga, for example. I received a ridiculously long email about a book renewal that could have been summarized in three sentences. Instead, this well-meaning librarian wrote paragraphs explaining a simple process. I thought to myself: she could have meditated in the time it took to write this novel of an email. Seriously, couldn't you shave five minutes from your 3.1 hours of daily email writing for a relaxing breathing session? I have full confidence you can steal some time from email writing to meditate. It can be that simple – or perhaps meditation can become your pre-meeting ritual?

My pandemic meditation journey was ritualistic. I needed a tool to reliably catch my breath and return to my three sons as the calmest version of myself; the stakes were staring me in the face. I'd drag my son's bean bag out to my wrap-around balcony – my "lanai" in honor of the Golden Girls – and sit under the sun. The benefits were two-fold: it gave me something to do during lockdowns, and I returned refreshed enough to homeschool three sons. Ultimately, I returned to my teaching post with greater patience, not totally "unsnappable," but feeling more able to relax.

Pro Tip: You can always find time when a boss drops a last-minute request. Somehow, you'll complete other assignments, shorten your timeframe, stay up later, or wake up earlier. Imagine treating meditation as vitally as that urgent work assignment. This is just your way into starting a practice – not necessarily how you'll have to make it stick – which brings me to the second reason for quitting.

Difficulty Maintaining Consistent Practice

Willpower is overrated. There, I said it. If I had unlimited willpower, I wouldn't have half a bottle of wine in my fridge or pair my glass with partially dry Manchego cheese at six p.m. when I nestle in my corner of the sofa before my sons fight me to the death to take over the TV. This is why I endeavor to do as much as possible before 9 am every single day – it's not because I want to challenge myself but because I don't trust myself as the day gets later. There's science to back this up, which is why I apply simple heuristics to maintain a consistent meditation practice.

My decision-making process is brutally simple:

· Question: Do I plan to eat today?

· Answer: Yes.

· Action: Then I guess I'll go to the gym, walk 10K steps, and meditate before starting my workday.

Don't think you need to do these things before meditating or before 9 am like me. Instead, use my question to spark your own chain of daily habits. Yours can be as simple as:

· Question: Do I plan to breathe today?

· Answer: Yes.

· Action: Then I'll take 5 minutes to pay attention to some of those breaths.

This decision tree below is for those of us who've been trained to overthink... just follow the nodes. I've found that thinking is often what gets in our way. Arnold Schwarzenegger shared the same sentiment about his workouts in his Netflix documentary: he said he could think after his workouts. Same goes for meditating. Think later. See Substack. https://open.substack.com/pub/melissallarena/p/why-stressed-professionals-quit-meditation?r=fetqt&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

My meditation practice looks different every day. Sometimes I'll light a candle, drop on my carpeted floor with earbuds, and hum along to a guru telling me: "I am not my body. I am not my mind." Let's call this my "scruffy, get it done" meditation. Other times I've meditated with my eyes open during a commute. I believe in habit stacking – pairing one existing habit with a new one.

Not Seeing Immediate Results

On Halloween 2023, I self-published my book "Fertile Imagination." My goal was to become an Amazon bestseller. While my three boys were putting on Halloween costumes, I was copy/pasting/pitching/praying. My ranking wasn't moving despite my efforts. I had two choices: toss my laptop out the window and curse Bezos, or maintain unwavering belief in the process. I kept going. When I woke up at 5 am, I was number one in two categories. Sure, I was just a good night's rest away from seeing my goal come true – but writing the book had taken two years, securing early readers required 35 outbound emails a day for months, and Amazon needed 24 hours to update their stats. A LOT went into it behind the scenes.

This experience mirrors the practice of meditation. It requires consistent effort, even when you don't see immediate results. You must trust that the benefits will manifest over time, just as I trusted my book would eventually rise in the ranks. It's about cultivating a deep-seated belief in the power of the practice, even when your mind whispers doubts.

Feeling They're "Not Doing It Right"

The internet paints a picture of meditation that's a bit... idealized. You know the image: serene folks, Lululemon-clad, perched on fancy meditation pillows, humming along to some ethereal YouTube guru.

That's not exactly my reality. This morning, I was planning to meditate, but my phone battery died. So, I grabbed my timer and dropped onto the carpet, aiming for those 25 minutes of blissful silence. But let's just say, my meditation practice looked a little different. If I'd meditated any longer, my husband might have gotten out the masking tape to document a crime scene. Let me explain.

If you could have seen me, I was definitely not dressed for a yoga retreat – just my usual work attire: brown boots, ripped jeans, and a cashmere sweater. Picture it: a perfectly respectable professional, now sprawled on their living room floor, looking like a crime scene victim.

Pause for a second to see how Canva's image-generating AI "Dream Lab" doesn't care about doing things "right." Let's learn from it. The first try is so wacky and wrong.

See Substack for images. https://open.substack.com/pub/melissallarena/p/why-stressed-professionals-quit-meditation?r=fetqt&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

The image below is closer to my original description, but it's still not "quite right" – like many AI-generated images. So give yourself some grace and aim for "good enough right now" rather than "perfect."

See Substack for images. https://open.substack.com/pub/melissallarena/p/why-stressed-professionals-quit-meditation?r=fetqt&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

Side note: if you had a second to take that pause, then you have time to meditate. ;) No side-eye from me – just pointing this out.

Here's the truth: There's no right way to meditate. You can meditate in a closet, on a Trader Joe's line, or in a nursery room. Simply be present.

Here's the easiest way to begin your meditation practice:

• Wear your work clothes. Perfect.
• Find a comfortable spot: A bed, sofa, or even a random rug. Even better.
• Set a timer for 10 minutes.
• Focus on your breath.
• Your thoughts will arise — that's normal. Gently guide your attention back to your breath.
• Give yourself a mental high-five when you return to breathing.
• Commit to finding your own meditation style.

Meditation has two-fold benefits when it comes to managing stress. Harvard Health Publishing confirms that meditation activates your body's relaxation response, which helps you navigate stressful situations with a sense of calm. Additionally, a JAMA Internal Medicine meta-analysis found that mindfulness meditation significantly reduces perceived stress.

So, whether you have to climb a mountain, you'll feel more capable of doing so. Or perhaps you can quickly shift your perception of a mountain and see it for what it really is: a surmountable molehill. You'll want to adapt or bring back your meditation practice if you wish to see more molehills than mountains and feel resourced if it's a real mountain you must climb up or down to get to the other side.

So, are you ready to give it a try?

Conclusion

Meditation is a practice, not a magical solution to stop thinking altogether. Be patient with yourself, and remember that even a few minutes of mindful presence can make a difference. A brief pause can give you space to reconsider a knee-jerk reaction or simply feel more capable of a tough conversation.

I hope this article has provided helpful insights and encouragement. If you're struggling to establish, maintain, or restart a consistent meditation practice, please reach out via email melissa .llarena [at] gmail.com or leave a comment on the platform of your liking Substack, Medium or LinkedIn. I can offer support as a mindfulness and meditation practitioner dedicated to finding solutions that can increase your ability to navigate life's challenges and opportunities.

Remember, your mental and emotional well-being is as vital as your physical health. They are interconnected, as I've observed in my research and personal experience. A healthy mind in an unhealthy body will likely experience discomfort, and an unhealthy mind can manifest in physical symptoms. Prioritize this empowering form of self-care and explore the many benefits of meditation. Your family and those you work with will appreciate it.

My Story – Melissa Llarena

I'm a meditation practitioner and #1 Amazon bestselling author who has spent years peering into the minds of marketers and executives, both as one of them and as their trusted guide. My articles in ForbesWomen have reached over 4 million readers, but what really lights me up is the deep work I do with people who, like me, have spent years shape-shifting to succeed.

My own journey through the corporate world – 10 years at powerhouses like Ogilvy (working on IBM) and P&G (yes, even Charmin!) – taught me firsthand about wearing different hats across 14+ business functions. For the past 13 years, I've had the privilege of coaching over 200 marketing and advertising executives worldwide, having raw, honest conversations about what it really costs us to morph ourselves every single day.

When I'm hosting the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, I get to dive deep with remarkable leaders like Beth Comstock and GaryVee, exploring how to tap into our most overlooked superpower: imagination. My psychology degree from NYU, Dartmouth MBA, and Transformational Coaching certification gave me the foundation, but it was the pandemic that showed me – and my clients – that we needed something more.

In 2021, when ambition felt impossible and imagination seemed out of reach, I realized we were all exhausted from trying to power through. That's when I took a leap – pausing my coaching practice to write a book filled with soul-searching questions, while earning my meditation certification from the Jack Kornfield organization.

Now, I blend all these pieces – my corporate insider experience, thousands of honest conversations, and meditation wisdom – into workshops, sessions, and immersions that truly connect. Using imaginative meditation, mindfulness practices that even the most restless executives love, and revealing journaling exercises, I help people find their way back to themselves. Because here's what I know: when we stop losing ourselves every time life or business throws us a curveball, we can finally use our energy for what really matters – creating the impact we're meant to make.

Have you ever told yourself "I'm not creative enough" to solve a business challenge?

In this episode, Melissa guides female leaders and mom founders through a powerful meditation practice designed to break free from limiting beliefs about creativity. Through a combination of mindfulness techniques and guided reflection, you'll:

• Learn how to identify and challenge creativity-limiting beliefs
• Experience a body scan meditation for releasing tension
• Practice reframing negative thoughts about your creative abilities
• Discover how to access your natural problem-solving capabilities
• Transform your relationship with creativity and innovation

The episode includes a practical meditation exercise you can use whenever you face a business challenge requiring creative solutions. Melissa shares personal stories, including her experience in business school and conversations with her son about creativity, to illustrate how we can expand our definition of what it means to be creative.

Connect with Melissa: melissa.llarena [at] gmail.com

About your host Melissa Llarena of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast

I'm a meditation practitioner and #1 Amazon bestselling author who has spent years peering into the minds of marketers and executives, both as one of them and as their trusted guide. My articles in ForbesWomen have reached over 4 million readers, but what really lights me up is the deep work I do with people who, like me, have spent years shape-shifting to succeed.

My own journey through the corporate world – 10 years at powerhouses like Ogilvy (working on IBM) and P&G (yes, even Charmin!) – taught me firsthand about wearing different hats across 14+ business functions. For the past 13 years, I've had the privilege of coaching over 200 marketing and advertising executives worldwide, having raw, honest conversations about what it really costs us to morph ourselves every single day.

When I'm hosting the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, I get to dive deep with remarkable leaders like Beth Comstock and GaryVee, exploring how to tap into our most overlooked superpower: imagination. My psychology degree from NYU, Dartmouth MBA, and Transformational Coaching certification gave me the foundation, but it was the pandemic that showed me – and my clients – that we needed something more.

In 2021, when ambition felt impossible and imagination seemed out of reach, I realized we were all exhausted from trying to power through. That's when I took a leap – pausing my coaching practice to write a book filled with soul-searching questions, while earning my meditation certification from the Jack Kornfield organization.

Now, I blend all these pieces – my corporate insider experience, thousands of honest conversations, and meditation wisdom – into workshops, sessions, and immersions that truly connect. Using imaginative meditation, mindfulness practices that even the most restless executives love, and revealing journaling exercises, I help people find their way back to themselves. Because here's what I know: when we stop losing ourselves every time life or business throws us a curveball, we can finally use our energy for what really matters – creating the impact we're meant to make.

TRANSCRIPT

Hello there. This is Melissa, your host behind the mom founder imagination hub podcast. This unedited episode is really geared towards any mom or female leader who has a business challenge that they must overcome with greater creativity. Someone who is seeking to find the inner innovator that. Maybe she once had once felt, but has been struggling to bring back to the forefront.

My intention is for you to feel empowered. My intention is for you to feel creative enough to solve whatever you're facing. Business challenge you wish to solve this very week. Now you may not know this, but over the last 13 years, I have coached female leaders who have shared their deepest, darkest, innermost secrets, such as why they actually leave different organizations or bosses or teams, or the things that they wish they could have done.

Done. Had they been given the ability to speak up or the ability to step up, you name it, I've heard it. And with these ideas in mind, I wanted to just bring forth this one limiting belief that I heard consistently in my line of work, career coaching, female leaders, primarily in the advertising and marketing function.

And it was this, this idea that I'm not creative, or I don't see myself as a creative person. The idea that whatever it is to be a creative is something that is impossible to achieve, to be, if I wasn't originally hired. on literally the creative team, oftentimes from an agency perspective. And so I want to help guide you through a meditation, also a little bit of a journaling exercise so that you can reestablish your relationship with this idea that you are creative, you get to be creative, and it is through your creativity that you can actually solve some problems.

So let's go into this idea of thinking that you're really good at something. For me, I remember being in business school. It could have been maybe like the first week where I was in a group of, I think it was like four of us and we had an opportunity to review one another's resumes and I remember at this time.

time before I became a career coach before I was, you know, also designated by the career development office at Tuck business school as a career coach of sorts. I knew that I was really good. Good at helping people promote their skills, their relationships, their abilities, their desires. And so I really stepped up.

I remember being on a picnic table in Hanover. It was a sunny summer day, which is pretty unusual because it starts snowing. I think like the end of September in New Hampshire, but it was a beautiful sunny day and we were looking at one another's resumes and I just felt really good. I spoke. up. I had very strong opinions pertaining to ways that my peers should articulate their wins, their experiences.

And to kind of quote Sheryl Sandberg, I was like totally leaning in to that experience. So that was something that I was clearly. Good at, and I felt like I could speak up then of course, for you, like there has to be maybe even in recent memory where there's something that you're really fricking good at.

And you may have had your own inner source of confidence to speak up, raise your hand, share your area of expertise. And it is in that spirit with that. Energy that I would love, love, love during this episode to remind you that you get to feel that way about your creativity and your sense of innovativeness.

And you get to feel as much as a contributor to a creative challenge as anyone else on your team or in your surroundings. So I'll give you a chance to kind of, you know, really think through that moment when you felt super, super confident, and I will give you an opportunity to do so in a very mindful way, but I just want to caveat this.

Right now, I am going to overtly ask you to become aware of a situation where you felt so confident. And as much as I would like to be almost like Jiminy Cricket in your back pocket and remind you how you do have these moments, in regular life, this is challenging. And oftentimes, We forget. And so I would invite you even from like a career perspective.

This is just like a pro tip here, but even from a career perspective, as tactically as your resume, make sure that you have at least one of a story or a moment that you just love to freaking tell related to something that you believe you're really good at and why might that be important because God knows You are nervous during a job interview.

So I would encourage you, or even like a pitch, if you own a business. So I would encourage you to have that quote unquote Easter egg, at least one of them on your resume. So now let's just take a moment to reflect. So take an opportunity to sit comfortably. You might be on the floor. You might be on a chair.

You might even lie down. I encourage you to just take a chance to breathe in

and breathe out

and just be present to think of one of those moments when you were doing something because you knew that you were really, really good at it. I'll give you a moment to think this through and keep breathing in.

Now, if you're new to meditating or considering this idea of taking a mindful pause and just focusing on the breath, that was just a minute. Now there's no competition. We're not going for some sort of endurance here, but I just want to share with you the short period of time that it took for you to reflect mindfully.

about one of those moments when you did something that you felt you were good at. And I say that because you can always return to a good memory throughout the day as you encounter moments that are a little harder to wrap your mind around. Okay. So hold that moment in your pocket. Not so much like Jiminy Cricket, but please do hold that moment in your pocket because That moment symbolizes that there are so many things that you just don't bring to the top of your mind that serve as reminders of the skills and qualities that you bring to the table.

And sometimes it's just hard to constantly recall those upon command. But as I showed you right now, you were able to do so just by returning. To your breath now as it relates to something that you may not feel as much confidence in these thoughts are Really? What what we call fear based or fear driven beliefs and The insight here is that they're not always true just because you think it Just because you repeat it, just because other people think it and repeat it about you, it doesn't necessarily mean that it's true all the time in every instance.

Now, constructive criticism is a wonderful thing. People say it's a gift, but I gotta be honest, I rather other things. But net net, the point I want to make here is that, You can actually take a fear based or fear driven belief. and reframe it or change it in a way that pulls you towards a desired goal.

And therein lies the practice of mindfulness in the simple awareness, almost like you're a Third person looking at a scene where you're giving yourself a little distance between the belief, the thought or emotion. And you're also opening up the opportunity for you to respond, instead of just knee jerk react, right?

And so let's play with this idea. Let's imagine that in third grade, you had some sort of drawing that in your mind, you thought was some amazing Picasso, but in your teacher's mind, she just thought it was just not cool. I don't even have a bad thing. I want to say about a third graders drawing, but let's just imagine she didn't put it up on the hallways.

So didn't get like the, the attention that you would have hoped. In her opinion, your art was not so wonderful. In your opinion, in that moment, you thought it was really beautiful. And isn't it interesting? Because it is you who carries that thought. in your mind for a long time thereafter that moment. And so, because you have your teacher's criticism or you have your own thoughts about how creative that drawing was, that would have informed your idea of what it was to be creative.

That would have informed your thinking around whether you were creative. And this could be something that has happened decades ago, but it's something that maybe you've heard. on repeat in your mind from that single instance, right? And so I want to just offer you the opportunity. If you have a creative challenge upfront that you want to solve this week, I just want to invite you to give yourself the best fricking chance you could possibly give yourself and not count yourself out.

Just because some third grade teacher said, Your artwork sucked. When it comes to creativity, I want to share with you this story. I was having lunch or some meal with one of my kids and my son was like, Creative? I'm not creative. When I think of creativity, I just think of paint brushes. And so I had that conversation with him and I said, Wait a minute.

You are so inquisitive, your questions are creative, like being curious and asking questions and piecing together different words, ending that statement with a question mark and having different responses and reaction to what you say is a freaking creative thing. And I say freaking because we don't use those words in my house.

Point of the matter is this. It was a reframe, right? So maybe, maybe it's true. Maybe my son is not creative from a arts and craft perspective. But if you look at creativity and you open up your ability to interpret what it could mean, what it could look like, sound like, et cetera, therein lies the ability to reframe a consistent, persistent thought that you just imagined to be completely factual in every instance.

So again, this is so normal, especially when it's a thought where you have been criticized, or it's like a warning, you know, like, don't go down hallway because you'll slip on a banana peel. I don't know. I made that up, right? And then you just think that all your life, there's always a banana peel down that hallway.

Like these are just things that are open and available opportunities for you to question, open up in your mind's eye and reconsider if it is not serving you for the task at hand. And so that's why I wanted to just kind of open up this thought experiment, right? So here we go. Let's just imagine you were told you're not creative in the past.

Let's just imagine really deep dive that this is something that's been persistent, like you've heard it from everyone around you, that you are not creative, you're not innovative, but here you are this week, maybe you have your own business and you need to solve a challenge creatively, because thinking linearly has not worked in the past.

I think I have like a, I don't even know, maybe like 572 examples of that. I'll give you an example. So let's just imagine you want to open up your lead flow. And what does that mean? That means that you want more people on the phone with you so that you can have these sales conversations. Linear thinking might be, okay, I'm going to start with, you know, ad spend.

Whereas creative thinking might be, wait a minute, who else might have this audience? How can I collaborate with them such that they win, we win. Right. And so again, It's really about almost like placing doubt in something that you feel is a no longer working for you because you have to solve this challenge as a business owner, or be something that you want to kind of like disentangle.

So that you can actually find out what the truth is of your reality. Like, are you creative? But maybe the situation has not been right for your flavor of creativity. Okay. So let's not get too far here because I see myself re imagining the whole episode, but I want to be sure that I take you to the meditation.

So here we go. I want you to really think through. today about how you could increase your awareness of your beliefs around being creative, innovative, a problem solver, so that you can mindfully see them for what they are, which is malleable, In the moment. So again, a strongly held belief that you may have had is one that might not hold truth in every scenario.

It might no longer be serving you in today's episode, right? So for me, this idea of math, math is something that, you know, I could say, Oh, I've sucked that math. Do I have proof? I don't. Absolutely. But might I also have proof that tells me a different story? And the answer to that is yes. Isn't that interesting?

The only way for me to have, you know excelled in a mathematical school. Or mathematical pursuit, for example, back to business school on the topic of capital markets. The only way I was able to actually knock it out of the ballpark, this exam that I recall kind of acing and feeling really confident and good about was because I was able to just almost for for that set of hours just totally mute the fact that one time I wasn't so good at math and this time I was able to be that person who always rises to a challenge, right?

And so again, it's about just placing a little bit of doubt in this strongly held belief, because there might be a situation or a moment where that belief is just totally, totally false. Now you can't bullshit yourself, like, I mean, I guess you could try, but I'm pretty sure you'll figure it out soon enough.

But what you can do is at least get an inch or two closer to To a belief that takes you where you want to go. So let's go now and do a little bit of a meditation. And this meditation is going to be different than just, you know, sitting down with our thoughts and focusing on our breath, because what I have noticed is that.

A lot of people assume that meditating means we have no thoughts. We're emptying everything that's in our mind and we're doing a bit of a mental cleanse. While that might be true because we have a ton going on in our minds, it's also an opportunity to just simply be that witness To the thoughts that are already in our head, but we might just not notice because we've got a lot of things going on.

So that's what this is going to be. So I will guide you through a set of questions. We will go through one thought that you might have or believe is true pertaining to whether you're creative or innovative, and then we'll see where you come out on the other end. You ready for it? Okie dokie. So let's do this.

Close your eyes,

assuming you're not driving, and I want you to just find a comfortable way to either be sitting, standing, or lying down. This is the interesting bit. If your belief is that you need to sit for meditation, or that there's even a right way to meditate, I'm literally going to show you that that is just a belief that might be right for you, but it doesn't always have to be the case.

All right. So just find a way for you to be comfortable

and we'll do a little bit of a body scan.

So imagine from the top of your head, a sense of calmness pouring down your scalp. And you're just breathing naturally.

Now imagine your breath clearing out any tension you may feel from your forehead

down to your cheeks. Make sure your left cheek feels relaxed and your right cheek.

Continue allowing your breath pass through your neck and feel the ease. as best you can. Continue along your upper back, the breath going down, just adding ease wherever it passes. Down to your mid back, then to your lower, breathe out.

Notice your arms, breathe through your left arm,

breathe in, breathe through your right arm. Again, Releasing any, any tension

as thoughts will find their way in and out. Just know that is totally. normal. Just breathe in, then

sink into your seat further

and sink deeper.

I'm going to give you a couple of minutes as you're relaxed as possible with this ease to answer this one question.

What thoughts pop up when you think about yourself as a creative being or innovative thinker?

Consider One of those thoughts,

perhaps the one thought that feels the most defining

or the one thought that might have been secretly holding you back through the years,

have that one thought pertaining to creativity or innovation. And whether you're capable of being creative or innovative in light of a challenge, hold that one thought, keep that one thought in mind.

Now, silently to yourself, I invite you to ask yourself a set of questions all pertaining to that one thought, that one limiting belief pertaining to whether you are creative or innovative.

The first question said in two ways, is it really true?

Might it be real, but not really, really true. Thank you.

as it relates to that one limiting belief pertaining to creativity. I want to ask you, what is it like to live with this belief? What has it been like to live with this belief?

In light of this limiting belief, I want to invite you to just notice how it feels in your body.

Notice how your body and heart might be suffering with this belief inside might help to think of an instance of when this belief got in your way

from a relaxed position. And then ask yourself silently, what does the vulnerable place inside of you need right now in relation to how you feel? this belief feels, how it's held you back.

And now as we're closing this mindfulness practice, who would you be without this belief? Who would you be without this thought? Who would you be this week without this belief or thought?

Would you be that person who assembles the team to solve the creative challenge?

Would you be able to solve this creative challenge On your own,

would you be the perfect person, maybe even the only person who can solve this challenge because you're creative in just the right way.

As we close this meditation, I just want to invite you to, to really soften your original belief. Whatever that limiting belief was,

place a little doubt in it or swap it completely for one that That you can hold. So again, it's not about BSing yourself, but maybe it's less declarative, less fact sounding, less debilitating. Maybe it's just about opening up

who you get to be, like your identity and who you are. I am someone who's possible creativity. I am a problem solver. I can figure this out. And just giving yourself some space so that you can play with an open heart so that when you approach the challenge this week, there's no need to run away. Instead, you're able to explore with what actually is available to you.

You're able to. Try your hand at something you may have never thought you could do, but maybe you realize that you're really freaking good at. And so I invite you, if you have a piece of paper or journal, not that you needed to at this very moment, but if you do just scribble some ideas. scribble some ideas of how you intend to approach this week's business challenge more creatively.

I know you can do it. And when it comes to mindfulness and when it comes to meditating, there's so many ways to approach it. And I really think that There's so many tools that do not require anyone other than yourself. And there's also so many different ways of using the tool of meditation and mindfulness.

And this has been one that I have seen work really well when it comes to coaching clients in terms of their limiting beliefs. It's this idea that. By being that third party awareness level of these thoughts and beliefs that we have passing through our minds, it gives us an opportunity to start poking holes in some of these thoughts and beliefs that are no longer serving us or holding us back or have us feeling like we're totally stuck.

And so this week I invite you to be more.

intentional about whether or not everything that passes through your head is a fact and completely the law in terms of who you are. And I invite you to be mindful and more open to the fact that Your beliefs, your thoughts really influence your behaviors. So if you could imagine playing this out, if you get to a place where you believe that there are instances where you have been creative and you look at this week's challenge with that fresh perspective and hope, then you're actually able to, and willing to, and will behave in a different, a new way.

Versus retreating, right? And not even raising your hand to solve that creative challenge because you're just not creative. So I hope this was helpful to you. I hope this serves you. I hope that it gives you an opportunity to just think about mindfulness and using the tool of meditation in a new way. It is not just about sitting down, feeling zen, and, you know, having all the negative Thoughts of the day wash out of your head.

It can absolutely give you that extra sense of reality and a greater, more sophisticated level of presence so that you can be very intentional about how you use the thoughts, beliefs, and ideas that have crossed your mind or people tell you. Because again, A thought, a belief is not necessarily some sort of hard and steadfast fact.

It can actually be malleable for the moment. Have a wonderful day. If you got value out of this, I would absolutely love to hear from you. To hear from you right now. I'm super excited about email because I am on a social media break. I think I've been on one for weeks now. So go ahead and email me and put my email in the show notes.

It's melissa. larinaatgmail. com. And let me know if you got value out of this conversation. I would love to hear from you. And if there's a, challenge or situation where you could use the presence or the ease or the thoughtfulness that introducing meditation in your life can provide, let me know. I'm happy to work with you as well.

Thank you so much.

When was the last time you actually looked forward to your commute? If you're facing a back-to-work mandate, chances are 'never' just crossed your mind. But what if your daily journey to the office could become more than dead time – what if it could become your secret weapon for better leadership? Today, we're turning the dreaded commute into an opportunity for mindful leadership, and I'll guide you through a meditation practice you can do with your eyes wide open, whether you're on a train, bus, or stuck in traffic.

In this episode, we explore how leaders can transform their mandatory commute into a powerful mindfulness practice. Learn a practical, eyes-open meditation technique specifically designed for busy professionals navigating the return to office. You'll discover how to:

• Use your commute time as a leadership preparation tool
• Practice mindfulness safely while in transit
• Set powerful intentions for your workday
• Manage stress before walking into the office
• Transform a daily obligation into a meaningful practice

Perfect for leaders and professionals dealing with back-to-work mandates, this meditation offers a fresh perspective on the daily commute. Whether you're a seasoned meditator or completely new to the practice, you'll find practical techniques to make your journey work for you, not against you.

If this meditation resonated with you and you'd like to bring something similar to your team or company, I'd love to hear from you. I'm excited to be offering meditation and mindfulness solutions for stress and burnout, both remotely and in-person. Email me [melissa.llarena [at] gmail.com] to share what your company needs – whether it's regular guided sessions, workshops, or custom solutions for your unique challenges. Let's work together to create more mindful, resilient workplaces.

About your host Melissa Llarena of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast

I'm a meditation practitioner and #1 Amazon bestselling author who has spent years peering into the minds of marketers and executives, both as one of them and as their trusted guide. My articles in ForbesWomen have reached over 4 million readers, but what really lights me up is the deep work I do with people who, like me, have spent years shape-shifting to succeed.

My own journey through the corporate world – 10 years at powerhouses like Ogilvy (working on IBM) and P&G (yes, even Charmin!) – taught me firsthand about wearing different hats across 14+ business functions. For the past 13 years, I've had the privilege of coaching over 200 marketing and advertising executives worldwide, having raw, honest conversations about what it really costs us to morph ourselves every single day.

When I'm hosting the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, I get to dive deep with remarkable leaders like Beth Comstock and GaryVee, exploring how to tap into our most overlooked superpower: imagination. My psychology degree from NYU, Dartmouth MBA, and Transformational Coaching certification gave me the foundation, but it was the pandemic that showed me – and my clients – that we needed something more.

In 2021, when ambition felt impossible and imagination seemed out of reach, I realized we were all exhausted from trying to power through. That's when I took a leap – pausing my coaching practice to write a book filled with soul-searching questions, while earning my meditation certification from the Jack Kornfield organization.

Now, I blend all these pieces – my corporate insider experience, thousands of honest conversations, and meditation wisdom – into workshops, sessions, and immersions that truly connect. Using imaginative meditation, mindfulness practices that even the most restless executives love, and revealing journaling exercises, I help people find their way back to themselves. Because here's what I know: when we stop losing ourselves every time life or business throws us a curveball, we can finally use our energy for what really matters – creating the impact we're meant to make.

TRANSCRIPT:

Welcome to the era of returning to work on-site.

In this moment, I invite you to be gentle with yourself as you navigate this significant change. Your feelings about this transition - whether excitement, reluctance, or a mix of both - are all valid.

I want to give you an opportunity to breathe while entering your next tunnel... or at a bare minimum, not to take it out on your team once you get out.

Brace for this change in how you move, work, and problem-solve the logistics of no longer being at home. Pre-plan how you intend to use this time in between spaces. Give yourself a chance to reimagine the purpose of your daily commute.

Feel the weight of your body where you sit or stand. Notice the points of contact with your seat or the floor. This awareness can be your anchor throughout your journey.

While living in Sydney, I would ride a double-decker over the Harbour Bridge, and it was then that I decided to use my travel time to be my me time... the me time that I didn't always have. I gave myself a 30-day meditation challenge that sparked this need to get in my meditating whenever I could, and that's when necessity became the mother of my mindful invention.

This was when I started meditating with my eyes open. If you've never thought about sitting still, focusing on your breath, and keeping your eyes with a slight open gaze, then consider this.

Whilst thinking about you, should you be closing your eyes on a mode of transit in a big city? Heck, no! Is it wise to close your eyes while driving? Clearly not.

However, closing your eyes is not the only way to bring a more mindful approach to your daily commute. There are other ways to use this time for yourself, for your pursuits, for your mental health.

I want to invite you to meditate with me as you head to or from work. I want to invite you to change your perspective, especially these early days of embarking on a daily commute.

Begin with an intention for the workday.... the reality is that as a species we tend to react. React to workplace BS. React to changes in our patterns. React to neighboring commuters. React based on our environment.

It is here and now that I invite you to bring intentionality to today.

Think about your intention for today....

Do you intend to be a better listener than you were yesterday... asking follow-up questions to gain a deeper understanding of situations?

Do you intend to give people the benefit of the doubt.... be more cognizant that everyone has their own struggles?

Do you intend to bring more certainty into a room or team setting... so that employees feel more secure in their jobs despite what the news might be featuring?

Do you intend to bring compassion to yourself and others as everyone adjusts to this change?

Do you intend to notice moments of connection with others, even in passing?

Take the deepest breath you can.... In/out [Pause 2 seconds] In/out [Pause 2 seconds] In/out [Pause 2 seconds]

Often we take the pace of the environments in which we find ourselves.... if you are in an urban center.... you'll quicken your walking speed or talking speed.... if you are in a more laid-back setting you may catch yourself adjusting....

As you breathe in and out... simply notice that you can adjust your pace to suit your needs.... your bus or train may be going at 30 mph, 80 mph, or at a standstill... it's of no consequence to you nor to your breath... just take it in and let it out.

Now there is no right nor wrong way of meditating... it's a practice.... it's not about forgetting.... it's about returning.... so you are going and you get to return and in that shift you are performing your own little act of rebellion.

Your mind wants to go here, there, everywhere, and you gently return to your breath... your breath is your home.

Keep breathing in and out...

Notice what thoughts capture your attention and just return to the breath...

It's not so impressive to meditate in a silent room on a meditation pillow by yourself.... it's more impressive to meditate in a loud space on a hard bench or whilst standing in a space that requires more of you to choose your breath.

Take a moment to visualize your day ahead. Perhaps there's a challenging conversation or an important meeting waiting for you. With each breath, imagine yourself moving through these moments with clarity and presence.

When you arrive at work, try taking three conscious breaths before entering each meeting – a micro-practice to center yourself in the present moment.

Commuting is the ultimate practice... in my opinion....

It's not easy to find a comfortable way of being at times It's not easy to demand quiet It's not easy to breathe sometimes It can be said that the same is true in like to respond in a world that is persistently seeking a reaction

As you stay put, remind yourself that you get to be intentional with how you use this time. Remind yourself of the pace of your breath. Use this time to plan your response. Give yourself a chance to live out your brand of leadership in a way that encourages your team to do the same.

As you get ready to complete this meditation, remember that this commute isn't just taking you to work - it's taking you to people who count on your presence and leadership. Each breath can help you show up as the leader you aspire to be.

I invite you to begin to move your toes and fingers at your pace. Truly give yourself an opportunity to use this time to mindfully approach the people and business challenges that will arise, and know that you can always return to your breath as a reliable reminder to whatever intention you set out for yourself today.

And on your journey home, let each breath help you process and release the day's events, creating space between your work life and your home life.

Sending you composure today...

If this meditation resonated with you and you'd like to bring something similar to your team or company, I'd love to hear from you. I'm excited to be offering meditation and mindfulness solutions for stress and burnout, both remotely and in-person. Email me [melissa.llarena [at] gmail.com to share what your company needs – whether it's regular guided sessions, workshops, or custom solutions for your unique challenges. Let's work together to create more mindful, resilient workplaces.

Ever notice how everyone picks the same predictable words for their New Year - peace, joy, freedom? What if your 2025 word of the year could be something totally unexpected that lights up everyone's face when you share it?

2025: The Year of Captivation Yep, that's MY word this year.

2025 is not just another year—it's the year of captivation for me. In the past, my time has been driven by business goals, from client acquisition to serving a growing audience predominantly of mothers. This year, however, my focus is on discovering and pursuing what truly captivates me—my word of the year.

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**Captivation: Inspired by Family and Stories**

Reflecting on memorable moments of captivation, I am reminded of summers spent with my grandmothers in Miami and Puerto Rico. My Cuban grandmother and her family were expert storytellers, captivating me with tales from their lives and adventures. These moments instilled in me a love for storytelling and a fascination with human expression.

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**Choosing a Word of the Year: A Journey of Self-Discovery**

I invite you to join me on this journey of selecting a word of the year—a concept popularized by Danielle Laporte in her work on desire mapping. Find a word that resonates deeply, one that isn't commonly chosen but is authentic to the sensation you aim to experience. Whether it's a bold choice like "captivating" or something uniquely personal, let it guide your experiences and interactions.

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**Practice Captivation in Everyday Life**

Achieving a sense of captivation doesn't necessarily require grand gestures; it can be found in simple, everyday experiences. Whether it's listening intently to your child's story or discovering a new passion, these moments hold the potential to enrich our lives profoundly.

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**Conclusion: A Year of Unforeseen Opportunities**

As we traverse 2025, I aim to provide you with content that not only captivates but also adds value to your life. This year will be marked by transformative changes in how I approach my business and personal life, integrating my newly acquired skills as a meditation practitioner.

Let's explore how we can make this year uniquely ours. I encourage you, my listeners, to think expansively, embrace words that are different, and stand unafraid in your journey.

Happy New Year! While we're at it, why not make it official? Subscribe or follow the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast, and feel free to send me a note afterwards so I can thank you—seriously, feel encouraged to email me melissa.llarena (at) gmail.com. Let's keep this engaging dialogue alive as we explore the art of captivation together. Have a captivating week ahead!

This episode is brought to you by:

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Subscribe and Review Have you subscribed to my podcast for new moms who are entrepreneurs, founders, and creators? I'd love for you to subscribe if you haven't yet.

I'd love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select "Ratings and Reviews" and "Write a Review" then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast for writer moms.

This holiday season purchase a copy or two of Fertile Imagination, email me your picture (under the tree by the candles) using this email address melissa [at ]melissallarena.com , and then on Christmas day I hope to share these images across my social media. Let's support the moms we are and love this holiday season!

Shop Fertile Imagination for the holidays! – https://bit.ly/fertilebook

About Fertile Imagination You can be a great mom without giving up, shrinking, or hiding your dreams. There's flexibility in how you pursue anything – your role, your lifestyle, and your personal and professional goals. The limitations on your dreams are waiting to be shattered. It's time to see and seize what's beyond your gaze. Let's bridge your childhood daydreams with your grown-up realities. Imagine skipping with your kids along any path – you, surpassing your milestones while your kids are reaching theirs. There's only one superpower versatile enough to stretch your thinking beyond what's been done before: a Fertile Imagination. It's like kryptonite for impostor syndrome and feeling stuck when it's alert!

In Fertile Imagination, you will awaken your sleeping source of creative solutions. If you can wake up a toddler or a groggy middle schooler, then together with the stories in this book – featuring 25 guests from my podcast Unimaginable Wellness, proven tools, and personal anecdotes – we will wake up your former playmate: your imagination!

Advance Praise "You'll find reality-based strategies for imagining your own imperfect, fulfilling life in this book!" —MARTHA HENNESSEY, former NH State Senator

"Melissa invites the reader into a personal and deep journey about topics that are crucially important to uncover what would make a mom (and dad too) truly happy to work on…even after the kids are in bed." —KEN HONDA, best-selling author of Happy Money

"This book is a great purchase for moms in every stage of life. Melissa is like a great friend, honest and wise and funny, telling you about her life and asking you to reflect on yours." —MAUREEN TURNER CAREY, librarian in Austin, TX

TRANSCRIPT

Welcome to 2025. It is Melissa, your host of the Mom Founder Imagination Hub podcast. Wow, like what was that? Seriously, it's so funny. I just returned from a trip to the colonies, as I like to refer the states that I have a lot of family in. So we went to New York, we went to New Jersey and we went to Connecticut.

Yeah. And I will say that the experience was a bit of a whirlwind, but it ended with just like feeling really, really sick. And so I'm on the mend, definitely feeling very, very. alive and excited and pumped about 2025. This morning, I already went to the gym. I did my 10, 000 steps, went to the groceries, did some laundry part two.

I mean, it's been a productive set of hours on this feast of the epiphany Three Wise Men Day. I even put incense with the scent of myrrh for the occasion of the Three Wise Men. You remember? What did they give baby Jesus? Frankincense, myrrh, and gold. So I would say, you know, it's been a really interesting start to the new year.

And in this unedited episode, you thoroughly hear that I still have the remnants of a, a bad set of bacteria, virus, But notwithstanding, I feel good. I feel good about 2025. And the reason why I do is because it's going to be different than years past. Years past have been really dictated by business initiatives, figuring out what needs to happen in order to bring in new clients, in order to better serve, You know, a brand new target audience being you a mom and also, you know, just a lot of novelty when it comes to the different ways that people approach, you know, lead generation and all that businessy stuff.

And so this year is going to be a little bit different. It's really going to be about figuring out what. exactly captivates me. That is the word for me of 2025. And as I tell individuals, my word, I am met with this whole idea of, wow, that's crazy, but like in a good way, because it's definitely a very high vibe word, captivating, captivate to captivate.

I put a lot of thought into it. And just to kind of share a story of those moments when I have been the most captivated, I remember every single summer I would spend a month in Miami and a month in Puerto Rico with my respective grandmothers. And my Cuban grandmother on one hand was A really good storyteller, as was my entire family from a paternal perspective.

And I would say that they really got into storytelling. So let's imagine they got home from work and they all worked in the police department and they had these amazing stories. Whether it was, you know, about criminals or if it was about, I don't even know, a salsero that they would have invited to like a Christmas party.

I mean, a lot of my memories are a little bit of a Patchwork quilt, should I say? Point of the matter, they would use their body to really express themselves. They would stand up in the middle of the living room to absolutely, you know, be on stage, quote unquote. And I felt captivated, completely engrossed in what they were saying.

And I'm pretty sure I had no idea what they were really, really saying. Because I was a little girl, but I was always really intrigued by the way they express themselves and the stories they would tell. And that's why for me, that is the word that popped up, captivating to captivate. And when I started looking up what it meant, it also had this idea that there has to be a willingness.

be captivated. So as I think through this word of the year for myself, I invite you to think beyond some of the words that are in the atmosphere in your local area. Or wherever it is that you might reside. So, for example, if in your community you might hear words like, Oh, freedom, or peace, or contentment, or words like joy.

Why not consider a word like, that is totally left field, but really nails the sensation you're going for. And then in the same way that the person who wrote this book about desire mapping, Danielle Laporte says, she basically said, you know, once you have your word or set of words, it's really about figuring out.

a myriad of ways that you can feel that sensation. So if I want to feel engrossed, plugged in or captivated, it's not just like going to great adventure and, you know, going on a roller coaster and maybe I am totally captivated by an amazing ride. It can be something as so simple, so sweet as paying close attention to a little story that a son of mine has, you know, whether it was something that he caught in school or something that he just wants to share with me or retell from a story he has read.

So for me, captivating has range. What about you? I would invite you to really think through. what you desire to feel in 2025. For me, as I mentioned, it was being captivated or captivating or captivate people. Because again, if you want a certain feeling, it really behooves you to emit that feeling yourself.

So that also implies I have to be captivating. And So there we go. So for you really think that through, think through right now, maybe write it down at some point, a couple of words that really, really ignite something inside of you, something that might be, um, a little sleepy right now. It might be a little bit kind of, you know, not used.

Just think of a word that you want to draw attention to in your life. And funny enough, When I chose that word, which is not the most common word I've seen, I started, of course, seeing that word, which has an actual scientific principle attached to it. Kind of like when you buy a particular car, you start to notice all those cars.

So, Happy New Year. I'm thrilled that this podcast lives on. I'm thrilled that I had the opportunity to share with you my 2025 word, and I really endeavor to captivate you, captivate you in a way that makes you feel better. After listening to every single episode, and I really do invite you and hope that you can be very patient with me because this is a year of change when it comes to the way I go about, you know, sharing my gifts and talents.

This is also going to be a year of change in terms of how I think about my business and my role and how I decide to you. You know, bring forth everything that I've learned, even new things. I just became a meditation practitioner. It's like official now I'm done with the program. So there'll be a lot of unexpected conversations, but also my ambition is really to make sure that you get value out of each and every single one of them.

So in this one, I invite you to think about a word of the year, and I invite you to definitely consider how you might make it. different or set yourself apart from those that are in your area. It might really inspire other people to think more expansively about their own lives and their own experiences.

Because every single person I've told this word to, captivating and captivated, like, It just brought a huge smile on their face and they really loved that word. They're like, I have never heard someone use that word in terms of the word of the year for them. And of course I say, I know you haven't because I really like using words that are different.

That captivates me, right? It holds my interest. being a little different and, um, unexpected and be unafraid to do either. Okay. Happy new year until next Tuesday. And if we are not official yet, like if you haven't hit follow or subscribe, I invite you to go ahead and do that. Go ahead and do that. And if you want to send me a little note, I will put it in the show notes.

Tell me that you actually subscribed or followed me. And. And I'll tell you a captivating story in exchange, I will email you. So you'll see my email in the show notes, have an amazing rest of your week. Thank you again for listening.