When dealing with addiction, whether you’re addicted to alcohol, drugs, porn, food, or whatever it is, one of the most effective ways to achieve recovery is by going all the way back to your inner child and figuring out what triggers your pain points so you can eventually take mindful action.

Author and licensed professional counselor, Eddie Capparucci, who specializes in the treatment of sex and pornography addiction, created the inner child recovery process to help people struggling with addiction.

A Vicious Cycle

When you start to feel that ugliness within you and you start to say how disgusting you are, that just keeps you in the cycle. You go back to your addiction in order to forget and not feel. And that’s the biggest problem. 

One of the keys to dealing with sexual pornography addiction, or any addiction for that matter, is learning how to sit with that emotional pain, feel it, and understand that it’s not going to kill you no matter how uncomfortable it is.

The Impact of Childhood on Trauma

For instance, when you have a sense of abandonment, there’s fear that people or whoever you bring into your life, are not going to wind up staying, whether they discovered there’s something about you that’s unlovable, or they’re just not reliable people. 

There is fear that lives underneath the surface that you try to protect yourself against that fear by keeping people at a distance. And so, you begin to build a wall even with people you become involved with romantically. 

You’re not going to let them get close to you because if you do, you give them the power to hurt you by leaving. But then if you have a wall up and you don’t let them get that close to you, and if in the event they leave you, then it’s okay because you can always replace them.

The Inner Child Process

The inner child process allows people to go deeper so they can identify the emotional childhood pain points that are still being activated today. It provides insight and it helps men understand why they engage in their addictive behaviors. Then they’re able to stay one step ahead of their addiction by identifying the core emotional triggers that activate their inner child. 

What are the nine different kinds of the inner child?

• The Bored Child 
• The Unaffirmed Child 
• The Unnoticed Child 
• The Emotionally Void Child 
• The Lack-of-Control Child 
• The Entitled Child 
• The Inferior-Weak Child 
• The Stressed Child 
• The Sexually Early/Stimulated/Abused Child

In the inner child recovery process, they look at each kind to see which ones they identify with. By recognizing the childhood pain points, they would now understand the triggers that activate those pain points. Then the next step is mindfulness. 

Supporting Resources:

NovusMindfulLife.com

Episode Credits

If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you.

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Ever feel like you're carrying a secret that's too heavy to share? In this powerful episode of The Addicted Mind Plus, hosts Duane and Eric Osterlind explore why sharing our authentic stories is crucial for lasting recovery. They dive into how keeping parts of ourselves hidden can actually deepen our isolation, while taking careful steps to share with trusted others can create profound healing. Drawing from the wisdom of pioneering psychotherapist Carl Rogers, they discuss how genuine connection and unconditional acceptance can transform recovery from a lonely journey into a shared path of growth. The hosts offer practical strategies for breaking down the walls of shame and secrecy, while emphasizing the importance of choosing safe people and spaces for self-disclosure. Whether you're in recovery or supporting someone who is, this episode provides valuable insights into building the authentic connections that make lasting change possible.

Download: Self-Disclosure in Recovery Worksheet

Click Here to Join the TAM + Community. Get the support you need.

Our Deep Dive is now in the community, where we discuss this episode in deep 

Key Topics:

• Understanding the relationship between isolation and addiction
• The role of unconditional positive regard in healing
• How to identify safe people for self-disclosure
• Practical steps for sharing your story
• The importance of starting small with vulnerability
• Using journaling to explore sharing readiness
• Creating a self-disclosure plan

Timestamps

[00:01:04] Introduction to self-disclosure and authentic connection

[00:02:00] The impact of keeping secrets in recovery 

[00:04:08] Carl Rogers' insights on understanding and acceptance

[00:08:35] Practical steps for building vulnerability 

[00:11:55] Understanding your comfort level with sharing 

[00:13:21] Journaling prompts for self-reflection 

[00:14:30] The power of community in recovery

Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

Supporting Resources:

If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery Center

NovusMindfulLife.com

We want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind

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At the age of 15, Aaron Perra took his first drink, setting off a chain of events that would lead him through the tumultuous landscape of addiction and ultimately to the healing power of poetry. On the Addicted Mind Podcast, Aaron opens up about his struggles with identity, family rejection, and homelessness during his teenage years in Minneapolis. Each setback became a stepping stone, as he found sanctuary in a 12-step program and support from Minneapolis' Youth Links, which helped him pursue a career in cosmetology and discover his passion for poetry.

Aaron shares the heart-wrenching journey of battling meth addiction, the challenges of codependency, and how a heartfelt intervention by a dear friend became the catalyst for change in July 2022. His path to recovery was marked by a network of supportive individuals who provided the community and encouragement he needed to embrace sobriety. The turning point in Aaron's life illustrates the profound impact of genuine connection and unwavering support, reminding listeners of the pivotal role that community plays in overcoming adversity.

In this episode, you will hear:

• Aaron Perra's journey from addiction to recovery through poetry
• Struggles with identity, family rejection, and homelessness
• Impact of a 12-step program and community support in recovery
• Battle with meth addiction and the role of codependency
• Poetry as a lifeline and creative outlet during recovery
• Publication of "Triggers in Love" and the importance of community support

Follow and Review:

We’d love for you to follow us if you haven’t yet. Click that purple '+' in the top right corner of your Apple Podcasts app. We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

Supporting Resources:

NovusMindfulLife.com

https://www.amazon.com/TRIGGERS-LOVE-Poetry-Aaron-Joshua/dp/B0CGYVW93J

https://www.instagram.com/aaron_joshua_perra/

Episode Credits

If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you.

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Have you ever left a conversation feeling completely drained, questioning yourself, or worse – thinking about relapsing? You're not alone. In this powerful episode of The Addicted Mind Plus, Duane Osterlind tackles the crucial but often overlooked aspect of recovery: managing toxic relationships. Through a compelling case study of a woman six months into her sobriety journey, Osterlind reveals how seemingly supportive family members can unknowingly threaten our recovery with subtle comments and behaviors. He dives into the science behind how relationships affect our physical health, from our heart function to our immune system, and provides practical tools for identifying and managing toxic relationships in recovery. Whether you're in recovery or supporting someone who is, this episode offers valuable insights into creating a healthier support system for long-term sobriety.

Download: Toxic Relationships Worksheet

Click Here to Join the TAM + Community. Get the support you need.

Our Deep Dive is now in the community, where we discuss this episode in deep dive

Key Topics:

• Physical and emotional impacts of toxic relationships on recovery

• Scientific evidence linking relationship quality to physical health

• Signs of toxic relationships and how to identify them

• Three strategies for managing toxic relationships

• The importance of boundaries in recovery

• How to evaluate your current relationships

• Building a supportive network for recovery

Timestamps:

[00:01:24] Opening question about exhausting conversations and recovery

[00:02:15] Case study of client struggling with family relationships

[00:04:11] Science behind relationships and physical health

[00:06:39] How to identify toxic relationships

[00:09:32] Three main strategies for handling toxic relationships

[00:11:13] Practical exercise for evaluating relationships

[00:13:12] Resources and action steps for listeners

Episode Credits

If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you.

Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery Center

NovusMindfulLife.com

We want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind

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Dr. Mary Crocker Cook graces our latest episode of the Addicted Mind Podcast, bringing her 35 years of expertise in therapy and addiction counseling. We tackle the intricate ties between attachment, addiction, and relationship patterns, particularly spotlighting the challenges faced by accomplished women who find themselves in mismatched partnerships. Dr. Cook sheds light on her pioneering approach of attachment-infused addiction treatment, helping us understand how early attachment disruptions shape decision-making and relational dynamics with profound emotional and financial consequences.

Our conversation takes a deep dive into attachment styles, focusing on the anxious and avoidant spectrums. We uncover how fear of disconnection can lead individuals to become overly anxious or to suppress their needs, causing relational dysfunction. Dr. Cook shares insights on how these behaviors are often rooted in a lack of trust and how addiction can serve as an escape from unmet emotional needs. We explore the critical role of recovery and supportive relationships in fostering secure attachments and breaking unhealthy cycles.

Navigating challenging relationships requires a balance of compassion and self-protection, and Dr. Cook offers practical advice for women trapped in unhealthy dynamics. By understanding attachment wounds and prioritizing harm reduction, financial independence, and boundary-setting, individuals can start making informed decisions toward better well-being. 

In this episode, you will hear:

• Exploring the connection between attachment styles, addiction, and relationship patterns.
• Challenges faced by accomplished women in mismatched relationships due to early attachment disruptions.
• The role of anxious and avoidant attachment styles in creating relational dysfunction.
• Understanding addiction as an escape from unmet emotional needs and the importance of recovery.
• Practical advice for women in unhealthy relationships, focusing on self-care and financial independence.
• Navigating challenging relationships with compassion, self-protection, and setting boundaries.

Follow and Review:

We’d love for you to follow us if you haven’t yet. Click that purple '+' in the top right corner of your Apple Podcasts app. We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

Supporting Resources:

NovusMindfulLife.com

Episode Credits

If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you.

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Have you ever found yourself lying awake at night, replaying that moment when you said "yes" but every fiber of your being was screaming "no"? In this transformative episode of The Addicted Mind Plus, hosts Duane and Eric Osterlind dive deep into one of recovery's most overlooked yet crucial components: setting healthy boundaries. 

They explore why boundaries aren't walls that keep people out, but rather fences that let the right things in. The hosts break down common misconceptions about boundaries, explaining why they're not selfish acts but essential tools for self-respect and healing. Through practical examples and clear guidance, they show how proper boundaries can actually lead to deeper, more meaningful relationships while protecting your recovery journey.

What makes this episode particularly valuable is its practical approach. The hosts provide a step-by-step guide to setting and maintaining boundaries, from starting small to handling pushback. They emphasize that while setting boundaries might feel uncomfortable at first, especially for those who haven't seen them modeled in their lives, they're skills that can be learned and improved over time.

Download: Setting Healthy Boundaries Worksheet

Click Here to Join the TAM + Community. Get the support you need.

Our Deep Dive is now in the community, where we discuss this episode in de

KEY TOPICS

• What boundaries are and aren't: dispelling common myths

• The connection between boundaries and successful recovery

• How boundaries foster deeper intimacy rather than prevent it

• Practical steps to start setting healthy boundaries

• The importance of consistency and self-compassion in boundary setting

TIMESTAMPS

[00:00:00] - Introduction and importance of boundaries in recovery

[00:06:00] - Understanding what boundaries are not

[00:09:43] - How boundaries protect sobriety and emotional wellbeing

[00:11:27] - Practical steps to setting boundaries

[00:13:58] - Step-by-step example of enforcing boundaries

[00:17:12] - Community support and resources for boundary setting

Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

Supporting Resources:

If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery Center

NovusMindfulLife.com

We want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind

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Depression sucks and it’s such a hard place to be. On the other hand, addiction used to be framed as this lack of moral character or willpower, and addiction, too, is a very hard place to be. But there's hope.

On this episode of The Addicted Mind Podcast, Duane speaks with Ben Spielberg, the founder and CEO of TMS & Brain Health clinics. Ben is a specialist in neuroscience, neuromodulation, and neuroimaging. Today, Ben is going to talk about TMS or transcranial magnetic stimulation, and how TMS offers hope to people struggling with addiction and its underlying mental health issues such as depression and anxiety, and ultimately, returning joy and passion back to their lives.

Ben started working in the field of mental health in 2010 as a biofeedback technician at a Substance Abuse and Recovery Treatment Center in Los Angeles. Part of his work was doing neurofeedback and he was just fascinated at how it impacted people, becoming more resilient to stressors without involving any medication or intervention. 

Eventually, Ben got a master's degree in neuroscience at Columbia with the hope to specialize in the overarching field called neuromodulation, which refers to evidence-based, nonpharmaceutical ways to create real changes in the brain.

With neurofeedback, all people need to do is to show up. It doesn't really matter what you’re thinking about. Your brain is picking up on the signals regardless. Listen in as Ben sheds some light on how TMS targets and activates specific areas of the brain that help reduce depression, anxiety, and all other underlying issues that lead to addiction.

In this episode, you will hear:

• Ben’s experience in neurofeedback and neuromodulation
• The concept of neuroplasticity
• What is TMS and how does it work?
• Cognitive-behavioral therapy vs. TMS
• Types of issues TMS can treat
• The role of ADHD in addiction
• The history of TMS

Key Quotes:

[05:54] - "With neurofeedback, all you have to do is show up. It doesn't really matter what you think about. Your brain is picking up on the signals regardless." 

[09:53] - "There's a part of the brain called the left dorsolateral prefrontal cortex... it's the left top side of your head and that area has been shown to be underactive in people with depression."

[10:35] - "When people do TMS typically five days a week, week by week, the symptoms of depression start to go away, just as this other part of the brain starts to come back online."

[12:55] - "Cognitive behavioral therapy is definitely an evidence-based treatment for depression. But when it's not working, there's nowhere to go unless you're actually creating real changes in the brain."

[15:37] - "People with ADHD are much more likely to be addicted than a neurotypical person… as well as way more likely to be incarcerated and a really a number of issues in life."

[17:26] - "ADHD is an issue of sustained focus, whereas normally, people have the ability to continue focusing on things when they want to, and they're not necessarily bothered by any external or internal stimulus."

[29:41] - "Addiction is really just a symptom of some other underlying mental health diagnosis."

Subscribe and Review

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We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

If you really enjoyed this episode, we’ve created a PDF that has all of the key information for you from the episode. Just go to the episode page at www.theaddictedmind.com to download it.

Supporting Resources:

TMS & Brain Health Clinics

https://www.tmsbrainhealth.com/ 

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Do you want to improve your emotional regulation and decision-making? I will be sharing the key to achieving greater emotional control and better choices. Learn the secret to enhancing your ability to manage your feelings and make sound decisions. Discover the solution to experiencing improved emotional regulation and better decision-making in your life.

Download the “Distinguishing between Primary Vs. Secondary Emotions Worksheet”

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Discover effective strategies for mental health and addiction recovery.
• Learn to identify and manage primary and secondary emotions.
• Explore the principles of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) for emotional regulation.
• Cultivate mindfulness and self-reflection for improved emotional well-being.
• Understand the impact of trauma on decision-making processes.

Effective Mental Health Strategies

Understanding and managing primary and secondary emotions are crucial strategies for effective mental health. These strategies involve recognizing the differences between valid and genuine emotional responses versus responses that arise from judgments of these primary emotions. This enables individuals to maintain emotional balance by preventing secondary emotions from amplifying the intensity of primary emotions.

The resources mentioned in this episode are:

• Download the worksheet that helps identify primary versus secondary emotions and navigate them effectively. Click Here
• Share this podcast episode with a friend who might benefit from the wisdom shared about primary and secondary emotions.
• Write a review for The Addicted Mind podcast on iTunes to show support and help others discover valuable content.
• Connect with The Addicted Mind podcast on Instagram @addictedmindpodcast and leave suggestions for topics you'd like to hear in future episodes.
• Leave us a message and let us know what topic you want to be covered on The Addicted Mind + Podcast. Click Here https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind

Download the “Distinguishing between Primary Vs. Secondary Emotions Worksheet”

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Former advertising executive Pao Ortega once found herself trapped in a seemingly perfect life in New York City, at odds with the inner chaos of depression, anxiety, and burnout. During a pivotal moment of introspection, she made the courageous decision to face these challenges head-on. In our latest episode of the Addicted Mind Podcast, we explore Pao's enlightening transformation journey, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness and kindness. Through her story, we uncover the profound impact of becoming a student of one's own body and mind, and how integrating practices from around the globe can foster healing and empowerment.

Our conversation delves into the powerful world of breathwork, highlighting the influence of ancient techniques like pranayama, qigong, and Shakti Nam in fostering relaxation and healing. Pao and I discuss how these practices can shift energy, create positive feedback loops, and guide individuals toward personal empowerment and wellness. The journey from internal struggle to self-healing underscores the possibility of overcoming prolonged suffering with persistence, consistency, and the right tools. 

We also address the importance of creating a morning routine that sets the tone for a successful day. Pao shares insights into how endorphin-inspired activities, like her passion for running, contribute to well-being and happiness. 

In this episode, you will hear:

• Pao Ortega's transformation from burnout to empowerment through breathwork and mind-body techniques
• Exploration of ancient practices like pranayama, qigong, and Shakti Nam for relaxation and healing
• Importance of self-awareness, persistence, and the right tools in overcoming mental health challenges
• Crafting a personalized blend of practices for emotional, mental, and physical healing
• Significance of mindset, movement, and nutrition in achieving personal wellness
• Creating a morning routine and incorporating endorphin-boosting activities for well-being

Follow and Review:

We’d love for you to follow us if you haven’t yet. Click that purple '+' in the top right corner of your Apple Podcasts app. We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

Supporting Resources:

NovusMindfulLife.com

Episode Credits

If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you.

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Ever felt like feedback in your recovery journey hits you like a punch to the gut? You're not alone. In this eye-opening episode of The Addicted Mind Plus, hosts Duane and Eric Osterlind dive into why criticism can feel so painful during recovery and share game-changing strategies to transform those tough moments into opportunities for growth. Drawing from cutting-edge research in neuroscience and psychology, they explain how our early life experiences shape our sensitivity to criticism and why some people struggle more than others with feedback. But here's the good news: by adopting what scientists call a "growth mindset," you can learn to receive feedback differently and use it to strengthen your recovery journey. The brothers share practical, easy-to-implement strategies that can help you shift from feeling defensive and ashamed to seeing criticism as valuable feedback for your growth. Whether you're in recovery or supporting someone who is, this episode offers essential tools for turning difficult feedback into stepping stones toward lasting change.

Download:  Growth Mindset Worksheet

Click Here to Join the TAM + Community. Get the support you need.

Our Deep Dive is now in the community, where we discuss this episode in depth.

KEY TOPICS

• Understanding why criticism hits harder for some people
• The connection between early childhood experiences and sensitivity to criticism
• How the brain's stress response system affects our reaction to feedback
• Dr. Carol Dweck's research on growth mindset
• Three practical strategies for developing a growth mindset
• The role of criticism in sustainable recovery
• Practical tools and worksheets for implementing these strategies

TIMESTAMPS

[00:01:07] Introduction to criticism's impact on recovery

[00:02:45] Understanding sensitivity to criticism through attachment theory

[00:06:00] Introduction to growth mindset concept

[00:08:00] Real-world examples of criticism in recovery

[00:11:11] Three practical strategies for developing growth mindset

[00:13:21] Practicing affirming statements

[00:14:57] Resources and community support information

Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

Supporting Resources:

If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery Center

NovusMindfulLife.com

We want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind

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In this episode of the Addicted Mind Podcast, listeners are introduced to Arlina Allen, host of the One Day at a Time podcast, who shares her profound journey from addiction to recovery. At a pivotal moment during a Giants game in Oakland, Arlina recognized the unyielding grip of addiction and the cycle of shame it perpetuates. Drawing from her new book, "The 12-Step Guide for Skeptics: Clearing Up Common Misconceptions of a Path to Sobriety," Arlina offers insights into the intricate process of recovery. Through personal anecdotes, she explores the influence of childhood experiences on addictive behaviors and emphasizes the importance of addressing root causes to break free from harmful patterns.

The episode delves into the concept of the cybernetic loop in behavioral psychology, highlighting how negative experiences reinforce damaging beliefs. Arlina's journey is enriched by her exploration of self-discovery and spirituality, offering a refreshing perspective on recovery. 

In this episode, you will hear:

• Arlina Allen's journey from addiction to recovery, highlighting personal experiences and family dynamics.
• Insights from Arlina's book, "The 12-Step Guide for Skeptics," addressing misconceptions about sobriety.
• The role of childhood trauma and family influences in shaping addictive behaviors.
• Exploration of the cybernetic loop in behavioral psychology and its impact on reinforcing negative beliefs.
• Internal Family Systems (IFS) theory and navigating internal resistance in healing.

Follow and Review:

We’d love for you to follow us if you haven’t yet. Click that purple '+' in the top right corner of your Apple Podcasts app. We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.

Supporting Resources:

NovusMindfulLife.com

https://odaatchat.com/

https://www.soberlifeschool.com/

Episode Credits

If you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you.

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