In this sixth episode of the Letters to Mothers season, we’re talking about infertility. What if you long for physical motherhood and spiritual motherhood feels like a consolation prize, like a second-rate motherhood?

What if you’re experiencing infertility, whether it’s a season of infertility with hope of a positive pregnancy test some day or permanent infertility and you wonder if you have any space in conversations about the feminine genius and motherhood?

Infertility is a burden that most women and couples don’t expect to carry. It can impact your marriage, your relationship with friends and family, and your relationship with God. On top of that, infertility often feels like a lonely and long path. But you aren’t alone. We’re talking about dismantling the lies around infertility, the importance of community in this journey, and how to support your spouse as you carry the cross of infertility together. 

Wherever you are on the path of infertility, if you’re looking for a place of respite, solidarity, and encouragement, this episode of the Letters to Women podcast with Ann Koshute is for you.

Topics we cover:

• Ann’s story as a Catholic woman

• The story of Springs in the Desert

• The importance of language around the experience of infertility

• How infertility impacts marriage and Ann’s advice for processing emotions and grief in the shared experience of infertility

• The importance of community in the experience of infertility and the resources that Springs in the Desert offers

• How to live in the present moment during the experience of infertility

• Simple ways of generosity and how you can be fruitful in your marriage

• What spiritual motherhood means in your life

• Ann’s advice for couples receiving a diagnosis of male infertility and how wives can support their husbands through that diagnosis

• How Ann lives out the feminine genius in her daily life

Resources for you:

• Springs in the Desert

• Springs in the Desert podcast

• Listen to A Letter to the Mother Wondering about Foster Care and Adoption, featuring Kimberly Henkel, co-founder of Springs in the Desert

• Today’s episode is sponsored by Rooted for Good - use the code LETTERS20 to save 20% at checkout

• Become a paid subscriber to Naptime Notes and get early, ad free access to all the Letters to Women episodes for just $5 a month

Discussion questions:

1. Has your experience of infertility left you feeling alone, or like you don’t belong? What is one practical resolution you can make today to connect with other women experiencing infertility?
   

2. How has infertility impacted your marriage? Have you struggled with objectifying your spouse or reducing sex to a means to an end of conceiving a child together?
   

3. In your experience with infertility, have you given in to despair or the belief that God has forgotten you, doesn’t love you, or is punishing you? How can you reject those lies, and who in your life can speak truth over you that you are a beloved daughter of God who is remembered and known?
   

4. How do you deal with the stress of experiencing infertility? What are some healthy ways that you can process the emotions around this cross and
   

5. Do you find it challenging to take things day by day in your experience with infertility? What are ways that you can surrender the past, trust God with the future, and be present to the now?

In this fifth episode of the Letters to Mothers season, we’re talking about mothering our babies who we’ve lost in miscarriage, still birth, and infant loss. Losing a child is heartbreaking and devastating. For mothers who lose a child before or shortly after birth, this grief comes with distinct, sudden, and difficult questions about God, the Church, and who they are now as parents to the child they have lost.

If you’re looking for a companion and guide through those har medical, theological, and practical questions, whether you’re a mother who has lost her baby or you’re a friend, family member, or medical professional who supports parents through that loss, this episode of the Letters to Women podcast with Dr. Abigail Jorgensen is for you.

Topics we cover:

• Abby’s story as as Catholic woman

• The origin story of Abby’s new book, A Catholic Guide to Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss: Compassionate Answers to Difficult Questions

• A brief overview of miscarriage, still birth, and infant loss, and what the postpartum experiences can look like for mothers in each experience

• Abby’s favorite question to ask her clients as a bereavement doula

• What the Catholic Church teaches us about our hope for Heaven for children we’ve lost through miscarriage, still birth, or infant loss

• How to grieve together and separately as loss parents

• How to wrestle with the reality that God is all powerful, all good, and yet our babies still die

• Whether or not you can flush during a miscarriage

• How Abby lives out the feminine genius in her ordinary life as a mother

Resources for you:

• Pick up a copy of Abby’s new book, A Catholic Guide to Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss

• If you want to learn more about Abby’s work as a sociologist, explore her website here

• If you want to learn more about Abby’s work as a Catholic bereavement doula, explore this website

• To discuss grief ministry training with Abby, reach out to her through Haven Bereavement Doulas

• Today’s episode is sponsored by Monks Bread - use the code LETTERS10 to save 10% at checkout

• Become a paid subscriber to Naptime Notes and get early, ad free access to all the Letters to Women episodes for just $5 a month

Discussion questions:

1. Have you lost a child through miscarriage, still birth, or infant loss? What has your experience of mothering your child or children who have died look like for you'?
   

2. How has losing a child through miscarriage, still birth, or infant loss impacted your relationship with the Lord? What are some moments of desolation and consolation you’ve experienced during the grieving process?
   

3. Have you felt angry at God during your grieving process? Have you felt guilt for feeling anger? How did hearing Abby share about allowing ourselves to grieve and be angry impact you?
   

4. Today, how are you parenting the child or children you’ve lost? What are some ways you can honor the memory of their short life here on earth while looking forward with hope to
   

5. What are some ways that you can support friends and family who are grieving the loss of their child? What does it look like as a Church and parish community to support grieving parents?

In this fourth episode of the Letters to Mothers series, Johanna Seagren joins me to discuss emotional regulation, our interior life, and burnout in our motherhood.

Parenting is hard work, and sometimes it’s louder, messier, more complicated, and packed with tantrums (yours included) than you expected.

So many times, we end up exhausted and feeling like this can’t be the vision that God had for your family. We’re diving into a conversation about what it means to be an emotionally-healthy family without losing your mind.

If you’re ready to understand your own emotional triggers, learn how to connect with your kids instead of reacting to their big feelings, and grow closer to each other and God, this episode is for you.

Topics we cover:

• Johanna’s story as a Catholic woman

• Why Johanna created the Interior Kingdom as an emotional regulation program for her family and what Catholic families will find inside the program

• What the Catholic Church teaches about emotions and what it looks like to grow in our awareness of our emotions as adults

• The things that set Interior Kingdom apart from the calm kits and calm down spaces you’ve seen on Instagram

• How to become curious about the triggers (unmet needs!) in your parenting

• The reason that Interior Kingdom is for every family, regardless of your kids’ ages, abilities, and temperaments

• How Johanna lives out the feminine genius in her daily life as a Catholic mother

Resources for you:

• Explore the Interior Kingdom program (and use the code LTW25 for $25 off the program now through April 10, 2024!)

• Today’s episode sponsor is Rooted for Good! Use the code Letters20 for 20% off your order at checkout

• Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes

Questions for discussion:

1. What have been some moments of disregulation in your motherhood? And on the flip side, what have been some moments of peace, regulation, and rest in your parenting journey?

2. When you were a child, what did your parents teach you about emotions? Do you feel confident in your understanding of emotions or is there room for growth?

3. What are some of your triggers (unmet needs) in your motherhood and how can you begin to meet those needs and invite the Lord into those unmet needs?

4. Have you ever felt guilty for anger in your motherhood? How did Johanna’s explanation of anger impact your understanding of emotions you may have labeled as “bad” before?

5. How can learning more about your emotions as a mother impact the way that you parent and live out the feminine genius in your daily life?

In this third episode of the Letters to Mothers series, Kimberly Henkel of Springs of Love joins me to discuss foster care and adoption.

We’re talking about how Kimberly and her husband Greg discerned the call to foster care. We’re also busting myths around adoption that might be holding you back from discerning that call as a family, and both of us are sharing our experiences as adoptive mothers. 

Whether you’re exploring the possibility of adoption or foster care, you’re already an adoptive or foster mother, or you’re wondering how to better support adoptive and foster families in your community, this letter is for you.

Topics we cover:

• Kimberly’s story as a Catholic woman

• How Kimberly and Greg discerned the Lord’s call to foster care and adoption

• The origin story of Springs of Love, Kimberly and Greg’s ministry that encourages, educates, and equips Catholics to discern and live out the call to foster and adopt

• The differences between foster care and adoption

• Spiritual maternity and the adoption triad

• Kimberly’s advice to couples hesitant to discern foster care or adoption because of the cost

• Why open adoptions can be healthy for everyone involved in the adoption triad

  
  

  Resources for you:

• Find Springs of Love online

• Watch the Springs of Love video series

• Ten Myths about Adoption from the Springs of Love website

• Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes

  Discussion questions:

1. Have you felt called by the Lord to discern growing your family through adoption or fostering children? What has that discernment looked like for you both as an individual and in your marriage?

2. What myth surrounding adoption that Kimberly mentioned in the show is something you’ve believed to be true before?

3. Romans 8:15 says that “You did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you received a spirit of adoption, through which we call ‘Abba, Father!’” How does reflecting on this theological reality of adoption in all of our lives as children of God through baptism impact the way you think about adoption and foster care?

4. What are ways that you can accompany birth mothers and families in the adoption triad?

5. Does your parish community support adoptive and foster families well? What are things you can do to encourage a culture of life for families who are called to foster or adopt?

In this second episode of the Letters to Mothers series, Grace Stark from Natural Womanhood joins me to discuss fertility awareness and motherhood.

This is a conversation about authentic womens’ healthcare, how to grow in an appreciation of your fertility as a gift, and discerning the size of family that the Lord wants to build with and for you—and what to do if you’re not on the same page as your spouse in that discernment.

We also talk about what it means to be mothers to daughters, and how the conversations we have from a very young age shape the way our daughters see their bodies. 

If you’re ready to get to know and appreciate your cycle and fertility this letter is for you.

Topics we cover:

• Grace’s story as a Catholic woman

• The origin story of Natural Womanhood and their mission to help women work with their body, not against it

• What authentic women’s healthcare looks like and how we can grow as women in accepting our fertility as a gift

• What the Catholic Church teaches about using Natural Family Planning and family size

• Grace’s advice for couples in seasons of discerning adding another child to their family

• What to do when you’re not on the same page as your spouse about having more children

• How Natural Womanhood is helping mothers of pre-teen girls learn about ther bodies, cycles, and fertility

• How Shelby lives out the feminine genius as a mother

Resources for you:

• Discover Natural Womanhood online

• Natural Womanhood podcast

• Charting Towards Intimacy podcast hosted by Ellen Holloway

• Check out the sponsor for today’s episode, Interior Kingdom! Use the code LTW15 for 15% off the full Interior Kingdom program.

• Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes

Discussion questions:

1. Have you ever felt angry or ashamed of your cycle as a woman? What were some messages that you received about your body as a girl, especially around your fertility and cycles?
   

2. Do you feel pressure to have a certain number of kids as a Catholic woman? Or for your family to look a certain way? What are some ways you can grow in confidence about how the Lord is calling you specifically to mother?
   

3. Are you and your spouse of one heart and mind when it comes to having children? What advice that Grace shared in this episode about discerning a family with your spouse struck you?
   

4. If you’re a mother to a daughter, how have you approached conversations with her about fertility and puberty? Are there things you want to change about how you talk about those subjects after listening to this episode?
   

5. What dreams do you have for your family and your motherhood? How can embracing your fertility as a gift impact those dreams?

In this first episode of the Letters to Mothers season we’re talking about a topic that so many of us are familiar with—body image. It’s a topic we’ve talked about on the show, but I wanted to revisit it with a specific focus on that experience as mothers.

Joining me on the show today is Shelby Hirschman. She’s a nutrition therapist who specializes in intuitive eating, body acceptance, and recovery from chronic dieting and disordered eating.

We’re talking about postpartum discomfort, the societal pressure to “bounce back” and why that isn’t helpful for us as women, and some actual practical behaviors and tools to put into place that I think can be a huge help. 

If you’ve ever looked in the mirror and felt frustrated, uncomfortable, disappointed, or unattractive, this letter is for you.

Topics we cover:

• Why so many of us feel at war with our bodies as mothers

• Defining the postpartum season

• The pressure women feel to “get their body back” or “bounce back” after giving birth

• What body checking is and why (and how!) to reduce that habit in your life

• Compassionate closets

• What is happening on a biological level to our bodies during the postpartum season

• How to prioritize consistent and adequate nutrition

• Habits to form in our lives as women during seasons of change to remind ourselves that our body is good

• How Shelby lives out the feminine genius as a mother

Resources for you:

• Tune into Shelby and I’s first conversation on the Letters to Women podcast, A Letter to the Woman Struggling to Believe Her Body Is Unconditionally Good

• Visit Shelby’s website to learn about her work as a nutrition therapist

• Subscribe to Shelby’s substack, Good Body Notes

• Shop Good Body Nutrition on Etsy

• Learn more about Catholics Online, the sponsor for today’s episode

• Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes

Discussion questions:

1. Have you ever felt at war with your body? What are some moments you’ve noticed postpartum discomfort in your own story as a woman?
   

2. In what ways has motherhood impacted the way that you view your body? Do you feel a tension between being in awe of what your body is capable of and discomfort or frustration with your postpartum body?
   

3. As a mother, have you felt pressured to “bounce back” after giving birth? Where have you received those messages from and how have they impacted the way you view your body today? 
   

4. Do the clothes in your closet honor the reality of your season of life? What would getting dressed in the morning look like if your closet had pieces in it that honored your postpartum experience as a mother?
   

5. What are some practical ways you can begin to be more gentle and compassionate when it comes to the way you view and talk about your body as a mother? Make one resolution today to help you remember that your body is good. 

Letters to Women returns February 13th with a season dedicated to motherhood. Plus, Chloe shares her favorite part of Saint Pope John Paul II’s original Letter to Women and reveals a few other surprises. 

Stay in touch and learn about upcoming episodes by signing up for the email list at naptimenotes.substack.com

A quick update about why there hasn't been a new episode of Letters to Women in your podcast feed lately ... and an announcement about the future of the podcast.

Should we care about what we wear? The short answer is “yes”—but don’t pull out your headphones just yet. There’s more to the conversation than that.

What about style? What do you think of when you hear that word? Maybe the pages of fashion magazines or reruns of Project Runway flash through your mind. Or maybe you wonder if style should even be something you think about—how many of us have felt guilty after splurging on a gorgeous dress, wondering how a piece of fabric can capture our imagination and desire.

We scold ourselves and say “I should bought something practical.” Or maybe you’ve even wondered if you’re vain if you care about how you look.

But what if that pull towards certain items of clothing is actually a sign of being made in the image and likeness of God? What if instead of finding a new “cool,” “fancy,” or “stylish” wardrobe, or becoming a “new” version of ourselves, we focused on how we can grow in an understanding of how we were made? 

In this episode, I’m sitting down with Lillian Fallon. She's a Catholic writer with a passion for helping women express their unrepeatability through style.

Lillian and I are talking about living life as an affirmed woman and daughter of God, how wisdom from St. Pope John Paul II’s Theology of the Body relates to clothing, and how to dress in a way that expresses who we are. 

If you’ve ever wondered if your love of style is incongruent with your Catholic faith, sister, this letter is for you. 

Topics we talked about in this episode:

• Lillian’s story as a Catholic woman

• The origin story behind Lillian’s new book, Theology of Style: Expressing the Unique and Unrepeatable You

• How an epiphany moment in a Theology of the Body class gave Lillian the freedom to pursue her passion for style

• What Theology of Style is and how it can transform the way we see ourselves and God

• What an understanding of modesty informed by Theology of the Body looks like—and why it is so much more than the length of a skirt

• Living life as an affirmed person who is confident in her identity, gifts, and passions

• How Lillian lives out the feminine genius in her daily life

Resources you should check out after listening to this episode:

• Pick up your copy of Theology of Style: Expressing the Unique and Unrepeatable You

• Saint Pope John Paul II’s Letter to Artists

• Check out Lillian’s website and connect with her on Instagram

• Check out the sponsor for today’s episode, CORDA, and use the code LETTERS to get 10% off your purchase at checkout

• Pick up a copy of the Letters to Women book (and use the code LETTERS at checkout to receive 15% off your purchase!)

• Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes

Subscribe and Review Letters to Women in iTunes

Are you subscribed to Letters to Women? If not, you should subscribe today! You don’t want to miss any of the upcoming episodes. Click here to subscribe in iTunes.

It’s time we get honest with ourselves as women today—we’re being lied to. Today’s cultural beauty standards are messed up. We all know it, and we all think we can resist the pull to look a certain way. But most of us—and our sisters, daughters, and nieces, too—are still striving for a broken kind of beauty while feeling like we’re not good enough.

In this episode, I’m sitting down with Melissa Johnson, a marriage and family therapist. The lie of today’s beauty standards eventually led her to battling an eating disorder. Through that experience, she saw that chasing broken beauty breaks us as women in so many ways. And she also realized that true, soul-deep beauty is not impossible—it abounds in us and all around us. 

Melissa and I are talking about how to uncover the hidden damage cultural lies about beauty have on your mind and soul, how to reconnect with God, in whose image you are made, and how to walk away from shame and striving.

If you find yourself wishing that you were thinner or smaller, have a list of things you wish you could change about your appearance, or compare your body to other women’s bodies, and you’re longing for a more self-compassionate relationship with your body, sister, this letter is for you. 

Topics we talked about in this episode:

• Melissa’s story as a Christian woman

• The origin story of Melissa’s new book, Soul Deep Beauty: Fighting for Our True Worth in a World Demanding Flawless and what you’ll find when you open the cover

• The unhelpful (but normalized) beliefs we are buying as women when it comes to beauty

• What happens when we embrace our bodies as miracles and what it looks like to practice gratitude for our aging bodies

• What living in loving community with other women looks like

• How Melissa defines true beauty

• The ways that Melissa lives out the feminine genius in her own daily life

Resources you should check out after listening to this episode:

• Pick up a copy of Soul Deep Beauty: Fighting for Our True Worth in a World Demanding Flawless

• Visit Melissa’s website, Impossible Beauty and listen to the Impossible Beauty podcast

• Follow Melissa on Instagram

• Check out the sponsor for today’s episode, CORDA, and use the code LETTERS to get 10% off your purchase at checkout

• Pick up a copy of the Letters to Women book (and use the code LETTERS at checkout to receive 15% off your purchase!)

• Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes

Subscribe and Review Letters to Women in iTunes

Are you subscribed to Letters to Women? If not, you should subscribe today! You don’t want to miss any of the upcoming episodes. Click here to subscribe in iTunes.

We’re living in a world of filters and photoshop. Thanks to the constant pull from the smartphone in your pocket, you might be experiencing internet overwhelm and social media fatigue. Is there any relatable women’s media out there that gives an accurate representation of what it means to be a women, reminds you of your belovedness, and encourages you to be authentic?

The world needs more of who women ARE. Not a long list of expectations of what we should be doing and what our bodies look like while we’re doing it. 

That, and more, is what we’re diving into today in this episode of the Letters to Women podcast.

In this episode, I’m sitting down with Mary Rose Somarriba,. Mary Rose is the editor of Verily Magazine. True to their name, Verily sifts through the noise of the world to elevate what is honest, real, and beautiful for the modern woman—facilitating her connection with the things that matter the most to her through our production of original media, curation of quality content across the web, and in-person events.

Mary Rose and I are talking about the mission of Verily, what it’s like for them to totally reject photoshop, and why they’re returning to a print magazine in our digital world.

If you’re exhausted from a constant barrage of media that tells you what the “ideal” body type, image, or status is and you're ready to be empowered to be more of who YOU ARE, sister, this letter is for you.

Topics we talked about in this episode:

• Mary Rose’s story as a Catholic woman

• The origin story of Verily Magazine and what sets it apart from other fashion and lifestyle magazines

• What has changed and what has stayed the same since the first issue of Verily was published in 2012

• Why being a non-profit fits the mission of Verily

• The false expectations that we’re sorting through as women today and how Verily encourages women to live authentically

• How editing Verily has impacted Mary Rose as a mother

• The ways the Mary Rose lives out the feminine genius in her daily life

Resources you should check out after listening to this episode:

• Learn more about Verily Magazine

• Subscribe to Verily’s print magazine

• Rethinking Sex by Christine Emba

• Mary Rose’s article at National Review on how the internet has ruined women’s magazines

• Defend Young Minds and how they can help you chat with your kids about pornography ahead of time

• Check out the sponsor for today’s episode, Sacred Heart Tea, and use the code LETTERS to get 10% off your purchase at checkout

• Pick up a copy of the Letters to Women book (and use the code LETTERS at checkout to receive 15% off your purchase!)

• Check out my monthly newsletter, Naptime Notes

Subscribe and Review Letters to Women in iTunes

Are you subscribed to Letters to Women? If not, you should subscribe today! You don’t want to miss any of the upcoming episodes. Click here to subscribe in iTunes.