We know we should study successful people and model their success. But how do you study success?

Don't crush your own dreams. The world around you is already trying to do that to you so don't help them out. You need to be an anomaly if you want to make big changes in your life.

In this episode we talk about how to get unstuck. On your entrepreneur journey, you're going to feel stuck. You're going to feel uncertain about what to do next. So what do you do about it? That's what we discuss in this episode.

Pain and struggle is part of growing a business. Eventually, you'll become numb to the pain and keep pushing through the struggle to reach your success

Show Notes: Definition of humble: Having or showing a modest or low estimate of one's own importance Can you accomplish greatness with that mindset?   Definition of self-esteem Confidence in one's own worth or abilities; self-respect   Nobody else is responsible for building your self esteem The world doesn't care about your self esteem Despite what people post online about 'being nice'   Most of your problems come from a lack of confidence in yourself You don't do b/c you're not confident in achieving the end result Uncertainty   Getting bullied - only solution is self esteem Only hurts when you don't think highly of yourself Ex: Magic forum cyberbully (thumb gangsters) You can't get bullied unless you accept THEIR story of you   Your Story vs Their Story What's the story you tell yourself in your head? Ex: Can't do something b/c of...(excuse) Ex: They say you have a big nose... "Uh ok. Is that your fetish?"   Average people want you to lower your self-esteem b/c it makes them feel better Crabs in a bucket Mayweather's father didn't tell him to not think he's great Tiger Woods, Kobe, Jordan, Elon Musk...they told themselves a different story They will say: "He's arrogant/cocky" Successful people understand Ex: Mike Tyson on Deontay Wilder saying he will beat Tyson Tyson's response: "He has to think like that. I thought that too"   The story in your head vs Story you say out loud Say it out loud = cocky Keep it to yourself = humble   Confidence comes from competence You develop self-esteem by knowing the truth (about you) Can't tell Tiger Woods he sucks. He knows he doesn't Don't need to say it...you need to show it "I'm the greatest" vs "I'm going to be the greatest" "I'm the greatest" = complacent & don't improve "Going to be..." = always improving (allows you to stay on top)   Doesn't mean you're cocky You're aware of what you're good at & not good at Only real confidence can admit what they're not good at   You have to think highly of yourself to accomplish great things Allows you to destroy obstacles Problems, people, anything Become delusional - "against all odds, you're going to do it" Elon Musk - they said it can't be done, he said "I'll show" The only people who WILL do it are the ones who believe they CAN do it   This isn't affirmations Affirmations is when you're trying to convince yourself of something you're not Confidence is when you know it to be true (you have reason for believing) Ex: Ali - "I'm the greatest", part showmanship but also knew the work he put into it Ex: Elon Musk - he understood the science behind it They understood they can 'get there' rather than thinking 'I'm already there'   You have to have a chip on your shoulder b/c of what it does to you psychologically Beliefs are more about what they do to you rather than whether or not they're true What does the thought do to you? Ex: Mike Tyson - "I'm going to kill him" Hit with bad intentions Believe it's possible = you try Don't believe? = won't even start   Self esteem = built through competence   Stop accepting the story people create for you "You're weird" "You're crazy" "It's not possible" "You're too old"   Start creating the story YOU want for YOU Self esteem allows you to create your story   Stop being so humble. Create YOUR story

Most people aren't willing to sit through the boring parts of their business, for long enough, for their business to take off Why aren't things working out for you the way you thought they would? You're too much in your feelings Story: Getting gigs with emailing was boring and hard Didn't say the right things People said no or ignored me Cold emailing is boring Excited at first, do the work, takes a long time, get demotivated, switch to something else What built the entertainment business? = Cold emailing...a task I hated Steve Jobs: "It's so hard that any rational person would give up" Most damaging success advice: "Do what you love" Instead, DO WHAT YOU MUST I didn't love cold emailing I don't love creating ads Story: Hated taking a bus to get restaurant gigs But it needs to get done by you or someone else The tasks that grow your business are the tasks you don't like doing. So most people don't do those tasks long enough to create enough momentum in their business for it to grow Same happened with building an online business Tasks are repetitive Create content, write emails, ads Didn't like ads but that generated the revenue Didn't like putting numbers into a spreadsheet but it helped Almost everything that will help your business grow are things you don't like doing ...that's why people give up To make it worse, you have to do it for a long period of time Not a month or two. YEARS Starting a sport = don't expect to be good immediately Things not working? Not doing right things Not doing the right things often enough Doing the right things the wrong way You don't know what problem you have if you're going at it alone Ex: Mike Tyson can tell you what you're doing wrong in boxing vs trying to figure it out yourself Success has a way of weeding people out who don't want it bad enough People distract themselves Consuming too much content, Working on your business cards, social media etc Story: I'm writing these notes, I wanted to ask Alexa what the whether is like Bad: You're training your brain to do things when you're entertained You're training your brain to do the opposite of what it takes to be successful Train to work with purpose = no need to be entertained You've trained yourself to need entertainment (social media, etc) Most can't work for 90 min w/o distraction Train to work regardless of being entertained Watch YouTube videos that aren't 'fun', but useful Why are you doing this? Keep reminding yourself Pomodoro technique helped me 90 minutes on a task no matter what The people who can focus for long periods of time will have a huge advantage over everyone else Get Out Of Your Feelings Problem You do things based on how you feel rather than what needs to get done Demotivated = quit Feeling confused/uncertain = "I need to plan/research" Have I gotten demotivated? Of course But I get up the next day and do it anyways Have I wondered "What do I need to do to get business?" Of course Deep down I knew the answer, I just didn't want to do it You know the answer, you just don't want to do it Successful people do it despite how they feel Turn the bad feelings into good ones Ex: Cold emailing 'high score' game I made up Ex: Keep thinking about your WHY Ex: Anger to ambition - prove them wrong Ex: Hated cardio on machines - did boxing instead Urgency - move fast, be impatient If a feeling doesn't move you towards your goals then ignore the feelings Feelings stopping you? = put yourself in a meditative state Notice your feelings, don't act on them You get numb to anything that doesn't improve your life Got so many "no's" that I became numb to it Failed so many times I became numb to it You need to create momentum Get enough energy that you couldn't stop if you wanted You get addicted to the momentum Sit through the boring parts to get to the good parts

You get demotivated when your expectations don’t match reality get excited do some work for a day, or two, or a week You don’t see immediate results so you ‘rethink’ & ‘plan’ You say “It’s not quantity it’s quality” So you slow down B/c you slowed down, you’re contacting less = only makes it worse You plan more, look at others online Wonder why you’re not getting results & get demotivated You blame the guru/person who told you to do the work You search for another method & get back to planning   Story: Moved into high rise & filming didn’t work Backlit & paid 10k for new equipment   Why do we underestimate? Never done it before - don’t know what to expect You see the end result but can’t see the work - you haven’t done it Experience = see into the future b/c you know the past   Story: Built the online business & underestimated how much I need to do to make sales They said “10k people on your email list and you can do a million dollar launch” NOPE I thought “create ad, send emails, sell product”…didn’t work   Build your endurance muscle I had no choice but to keep going b/c I didn’t have a job I’ve become numb to failure… Restaurants helped me - GMs said no…lost restaurant gigs…lost corporate gigs Other failures - prospecting, product launch fails, etc   Just because something didn’t work doesn’t mean it doesn’t work You have to get it to work for you   Doing the right things vs doing those things right are two different things I was emailing (doing the right thing) but I wasn’t doing it right (saying the right things in the emails) Are you doing the right things or not doing it right?   If you’re feeling demotivated, keep pushing Steve Jobs “People say you have to have a lot of passion for what you’re doing and it’s totally true. And the reason is because it’s so hard that if you don’t, any rational person would give up” Nothing wrong with you if you give up Pushing when it’s hard isn’t ‘normal’…don’t be normal Arnold Schwarzenegger - build muscle at the moment you want to give up

definition: the impetus(force) gained by a moving object   Problem: Most people don’t get things done or start/stop   Story: Living with a friend & schedule days to prospect. Got momentum, then stopped. Hard to get back   Story 2: Facebook ads were going, I had to stop to change the website & didn’t start until two months later Made excuses about ‘creating content’   Momentum makes you an unstoppable force Makes you obsessed by generating thoughts because you have to keep up Sense of urgency You get excited and feel like you can (and should) do more   I went out for walks and felt hyped because of the energy a walk creates I did weekly calls and got hyped at the end of the calls on Sundays to keep working   E=mc2 … energy becomes mass I don’t care if it’s not true, let me believe in Santa Claus Under the right conditions, energy can become mass and vice versa The energy you have, actively creates something physical Ex: Thoughts in my head became a book on restaurant magic It never existed, until it did   Get into the habit of making decisions You won’t make ‘right’ decisions all the time Think ‘speed’ first. Then worry about being ‘right’ later You can fix wrong decisions But you’re stuck if no decision has been made   Excuses & reasons destroy momentum PT Barnum didn’t have the money to buy Joice Heth but figured it out He committed and figured it out later. NO EXCUSES MODE Momentum makes you commit and figure it out later Iterate your way to success People say ‘it’s about quality’ or ‘do it right the first time’ so nothing happens in their life   Momentum is created when you feel like you’re on a mission People say ‘set goals’ because you’re on a mission   Just get out there and do something   definition: the impetus(force) gained by a moving object BECOME the moving object that turns ideas into reality through practical execution

This is the email that was sent out... The first time I hit $1,000 a month, I thought it was amazing. Then $10,000 a month. Then $25,000. Then $90,000/month, etc. I looked at the $90,000 that month and thought, “Damn…for the longest time I struggled to make that in a year, and I just did it in a month.” What changed? What was the mindset that changed inside of me that allowed it to happen? Honestly…nothing. I was always a badass. Success doesn’t happen overnight, you iterate your way to it. You keep changing and adjusting until you finally get it one day. But I want to give you 4 nuggets that I found useful over time… Nugget 1: Don’t trust your thoughts just because they came from you Throughout my time marketing myself (aka my entire life…I’ve never had a job)…I’ve learned that you can’t trust your own thoughts in the beginning (when you’re not making money). The reason is because you’ve been brainwashed by culture. The thoughts in your head are ‘average people thoughts’ that you grew up with. And you’ve heard those thoughts so often that you believe them to be you. They’re not. They’re a collection of other people who don’t have the results you want. So just because your thoughts come from you, it doesn’t make them any more true. When you’re building your business, you need to ignore your initial thoughts. You need to pay close attention to thoughts that are useful. Not thoughts that you believe. Nugget 2: You wait and wait and wait. You eat doo-doo for years. Then you finally say, “Hell yea  What’s next!” The results you want are going to take longer than you thought…a lot longer. So you have to eat doo-doo for years. People will see you as a scrub…because you are one. People will talk down to you…because you really aren’t on their level. And you have to sit there and take it…because they’re right. Then after all the years, you’ll look up and say, “Yea that’s right motha f*****” Nugget 3: People will tell you that you’re emailing too much, ignore them. When I started prospecting for events, I followed up like crazy. If I contacted an event and they ignored me, I kept emailing them. Several people got mad and condemned me to hell. But several others hired me for $25,000 gigs. Which one do you think I listened to? And the same happened when I started building an email list. I made a decision to email every day, and several people would reply with nasty emails. People kept saying, “Damn man you email too much. Take me off your f’n list you piece of sh*t.” And that was a nice version. But my bank account kept growing. So which one do you think I listened to? Nugget 4: Lions don’t lose sleep over the opinions of sheep The entire time you’re building your business, people will have their say. People will tell you to prove yourself. And like a dummy, I tried to do it in the beginning. I remember a guy who said, “Prove to me you booked a $10,000 gig. Show me a check.” And I did. But he thought it was photoshopped. A different guy once asked me to prove to him how much I sold online. And I did. But he thought I was lying. Eventually, I realized these people aren’t buyers. They’re time-wasters. They will never buy or believe anything I say. You’re a lion. They’re sheep. Ignore them because you have nothing to prove. Listen very closely… You have the ability to impact the world by getting the word out about what you do…keep your eyes on prize.

  The only thing standing in your way of growing your business are the excuses you make for why you don’t have any business.   I don’t know how much you’re making right now in your business, but I do know that if you’re not making at least six figures, you’re making excuses instead.   You don’t have time because you have a job and you have kids. I hear you.   You can’t spend money right now because you have to pay bills. I hear you.   You can’t bring a video guy with you to an event. I hear you.   But do you know what I hear?   “Excuse, excuse, excuse.”   I literally started with $0. Literally. No money from parents. No loans. No nothing. Just a single parent home where my mom was making $1,800 a month with 3 kids. She couldn’t give me money to start my business if she wanted.   When you start growing your business, you’ll realize that the only reason you didn’t do it faster was because you kept making excuses. “Yea but he can do it because…blah blah blah.”   Listen to this podcast because the second you stop making excuses, you’ll start making money.

Most people don’t do enough. They haven’t decided to be great yet and it’s costing them everything. But when you decide to be great, you work through the pain. When things don’t work out, you figure out another way. When that doesn’t work, who cares, you figure out another way. And you keep going. The day you decide to be great is the day your life changes forever.