Are women really better at all the things we do? Or are we just used to doing more?

Amy talks with sociologist and author Leah Ruppanner, author of the new book DRAINED, about her definition of the "mental load" and why so many women feel constantly overwhelmed.

Leah defines the mental load as much more than keeping track of tasks. It’s deeply emotional work tied to caring for others, anticipating needs, and managing relationships.

In this interview Leah breaks down the different types of mental load, from organizing daily life to providing emotional support, maintaining relationships, creating special moments for families, and supporting everyone else’s goals. While many partners contribute in visible ways, much of this broader, invisible work still falls to women.

Leah also shares a practical framework for evaluating your mental load: understanding where your energy is going, who you’re carrying, and what you can delegate, drop, or rebalance. When reducing the load isn’t possible, rest and recovery become essential. Think of yourself as the family MVP.

This episode is a reminder that the mental load is real, complex, and worth examining—and that making it visible is the first step toward meaningful change.

Here's where you can find Leah:

• @prof.leahruppanner on Instagram, TikTok
• The Miss Perceived Podcast
• https://www.leahruppanner.com
• Buy DRAINED: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593850909

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What is emotional intelligence, exactly? Is it the yin to IQ's yang? Is it equally crucial to our success and well-being?

In this episode we talk about what EQ (or EI, depending on who you're asking) actually means, why it matters, and whether it can be taught to both adults and kids.

We discuss:

• The four core components of emotional intelligence: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship skills (plus what's been taken off the list)
• Why emotional intelligence is morally neutral
• Why neurodivergent kids may experience emotional intelligence differently
• Practical ways to help kids build emotional intelligence

Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:

• Suzanne Ross for The Explainer: What is emotional intelligence and why do you need it?
• Crystal Ott for Ohio University Extension: What is Emotional Intelligence?
• Daniel Goleman on LinkedIn: The Four Domains of Emotional Intelligence
• Adam Grant for Medium: The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence
• Peg Rosen for Understood.org: Emotional intelligence: What it means for kids
• Brigham Young University: Study visually captures hard truth: Walking home at night is not the same for women
• University of Cambridge Judge Business School: The psychologist who reminds us that emotions affect our working lives

Find all of our guests' books, as well as books we personally recommend: https://bookshop.org/shop/whatfreshhellcast

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our past episodes about the joys and the challenges that come with raising kids with differences and disabilities.

Kate Swenson writes and creates videos about her life as a mother of four and and an autism advocate for ⁠"Finding Cooper's Voice⁠," a living, thriving community of people who not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families.

We discuss Kate's book ⁠Forever Boy: A Mother's Memoir of Autism and Finding Joy⁠ and her nonprofit ⁠The More Than Project, ⁠which supports the needs of special needs families that go beyond the needs of their special needs child.

Kate tells us about:

• Kate's journey to finding the correct diagnosis for her child
• what led her to put her story out into the world
• the sometimes-loneliness of special needs parenting, and how the Finding Cooper's Voice community offers insight, support, and fellowship

Get FOREVER BOY in our Bookshop store: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780778311997

and follow @findingcoopersvoice on Facebook and Instagram.

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What happens when childhood becomes content? Journalist Fortesa Latifi, author of the new book LIKE, FOLLOW, SUBSCRIBE, discusses the rise of influencer families and the growing world of kid influencers. We explore how parenting content has evolved from "mommy blogs" to today’s visual and monetized social media landscape, where children are often at the center of viral content.

Fortesa explains why family vlogging is so compelling, and the powerful parasocial relationships audiences form with influencer families. She also breaks down the ethical gray areas of sharing kids online, including issues of privacy, consent, and the long-term digital footprint created for children who cannot fully understand or agree to their online presence.

Fortesa discusses the role of viewers in driving demand for this content and the emerging legal efforts to regulate earnings and protect influencer kids. She offers a nuanced look at family vlogging, encouraging parents and audiences alike to think more critically about what it means to share children’s lives online.

Here's where you can find Fortesa:

• https://www.fortesalatifi.com
• @hifortesa on socials
• Buy LIKE, FOLLOW, SUBSCRIBE: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781668080504

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What are the parenting milestones no one tells you about—but that completely change your daily life? We asked our listeners about the little wins of parenting that make a huge difference in reducing the day-to-day chaos, from kids pouring their own cereal to finally being able to leave them home alone.

Listen to our interview with Christina Martin here

Subscribe to our YouTube channel!

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is about embracing the joys and acknowledging the challenges that come with raising kids with differences and disabilities.

How do we celebrate and encourage kids with disabilities and differences, without letting our fears and preconceptions dictate what we think they can do?

How do parents of kids with less understanding of differences and disabilities allow for children's natural curiosity?

Meg Zucker, author of the book ⁠Born Extraordinary: Empowering Children with Differences & Disabilities⁠, was born with a genetic condition called ectrodactyly. She is also the mother of three children, two of whom share this difference.

Meg is also the founder and president of Don’t Hide It, Flaunt It, a non-profit with the mission of advancing understanding, tolerance, and mutual respect for people's differences.

In this episode Meg and Amy discuss:

• "Disability" versus "difference," and how people choose the words that feel right for them
• How Meg's experience growing up different made her parenting kids with differences a little easier—though maybe not as much as someone outside that experience might expect
• the well-meaning "thrusting of help" that we might reconsider

Here's where you can find Meg:

• @MegZucker
• @Justflauntit_
• Buy Meg's book: ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593419380⁠

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As kids prepare to leave home for college, we tend to wonder: have we taught them everything they need to know? Christina Geist—author of Before You Fly Away: Life Lessons from Home—shares how this transition can feel like a “parental report card.”

Christina's late-night reflections and “mini panic moments" as her child prepared to leave for college became a collection of concise life lessons meant to guide her child toward independence. But the process also turned out to provide a way for Christina to process her own fears and hopes.

Parents often harbor fear that things won’t go perfectly once kids leave home. Christina acknowledges that college—and life—will include mistakes, loneliness, and challenges.

But those “blind spots” are actually essential. Growth happens when kids figure things out on their own, whether it’s resolving roommate conflicts or navigating new responsibilities.

As Christina puts it: “Figure it out. You’re 100% capable.”

Here's where you can find Christina:

• www.christinageist.com
• Buy BEFORE YOU FLY AWAY: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9798881612023

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why do we cling to what’s familiar—even when it’s not working? In this episode we explore why humans are wired to avoid uncertainty, and how that shapes our decisions and our parenting.

We discuss the Ellsberg Paradox, which explains why we often choose “the devil we know” over potentially better—but unknown—options. Whether it’s staying in a situation that no longer serves us, avoiding difficult conversations, or overthinking every possible outcome, our brains are constantly trying to reduce uncertainty—even at a cost.

We discuss how the brain’s fear center (the amygdala) reacts more strongly to ambiguity than to actual risk, triggering stress responses like anxiety, overthinking, and catastrophizing. This helps explain why uncertainty can feel so overwhelming—even when nothing is actually wrong.

We discuss Dr. Rue Wilson's notion of “toxic time travel" and how our search for reassurance pulls us out of the present into either mentally replaying the past or imagining worst-case futures, keeping us stuck in cycles of worry.

We also explore how this shows up in parenting. Kids who resist new situations, struggle with transitions, or seem overly anxious may not be reacting to real danger—but to uncertainty itself. Understanding this can help us respond with more empathy and curiosity rather than frustration.

Finally, we share practical strategies for managing uncertainty—for ourselves and our kids:

• Separating real risk from fear of the unknown
• Using curiosity instead of rumination
• Reality-checking anxious thoughts
• Focusing on what’s within our control
• Grounding ourselves in the present moment

Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:

• ambiguity aversion
• Tara Cousineau for Harvard Graduate School of Arts and Sciences: Coping with Uncertainty
• Lauren Arcuri for the American Physiological Society: The Brain's Response to Uncertainty and Ambiguity

• Gretchen Rubin: How to Make Tough Decisions: Choose the Bigger Life
• Dorie Clark on Instagram: Your Brain Is Lying to You About Risk

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In honor of Women's History Month, this "Deep Dive" series highlights some of our past interview episodes about raising daughters.

Janice Johnson Dias⁠ is a professor of sociology at John Jay College, and author of ⁠PARENT LIKE IT MATTERS: HOW TO RAISE JOYFUL, CHANGE-MAKING GIRLS⁠⁠. Her collaborative work on black girls’ mental, sexual, and physical health issues earned her a special Congressional recognition.

In this conversation, Janice explains how we can embolden both our daughters and our sons to find their passions– but only by finding our own passions first. Janice argues that change-making is the path to true joy.

You can find PARENT LIKE IT MATTERS here in our Bookshop store: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781984819628

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

What Fresh Hell podcast, mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why is it so hard to read more—even when we want to, even when we have stacks of books awaiting us on our bedside tables? We sit down with Meredith Monday Schwartz—co-host of the The Currently Reading Podcast—to talk about how to reconnect with reading in a way that feels joyful, flexible, and realistic.

If you’ve ever felt obliged to finish a book you hated, or berate yourself for the time you spend scrolling instead of reading, this conversation is for you.

It’s not that there aren’t good books out there. It’s that our phones are designed to win. Picking up a book requires focus and intention—two things that feel increasingly scarce.

But reading offers a deeper kind of satisfaction than screens. Books can provide immersion, rest, perspective, and even emotional connection.

Meredith argues that reading isn’t just a habit. It's a form of meaningful self-care. Stepping away—even briefly—can leave you more refreshed, focused, and able to engage with the world when you return.

Meredith also argues for “delicious reads” over "should reads." Forcing yourself through something that doesn’t work for you can lead to burnout—and even stop you from reading altogether.

Reader, Know Thyself

A central theme of the conversation is learning what kind of reader you are. (Take the "What Kind of Reader Are You?" quiz here!)

Understanding your preferences helps you:

• Choose books you’ll actually finish
• Avoid common “deal breakers”
• Create a reading routine that fits your life

Permission to Not Finish (DNF) Books

If you’ve ever forced yourself to finish a book you weren’t enjoying, this is your official permission slip to stop.

Meredith is a strong advocate for DNF (“Did Not Finish”), with a twist: sometimes it’s not a “no,” it’s a “not right now.”

A book that doesn’t resonate today might become a favorite later in life. Letting go of a book that isn’t working frees you to find one that does—and can instantly reignite your reading momentum.

How to Get Back Into Reading

Feeling stuck? Meredith shares simple, practical strategies to help you ease back into reading:

• Start small: Commit to just 15–20 minutes at a time
• Pair reading with a routine: Try reading during a bath or before bed
• Use multiple formats: Audiobooks, Ebooks, and print can all coexist
• Create a “book flight”: Sample the first few pages of several books and choose what grabs you
• Always have options: Keep a list of appealing reads ready to go

If your kids used to love books but now prefer screens, you’re not alone.

The most effective strategy? Model reading yourself.

When kids see you enjoying books, it sends a powerful message that reading is valuable and enjoyable. There’s no quick fix—but there is long-term impact.

Here's where you can find Meredith:

• IG @meredithmondayschwartz or @currentlyreadingpodcast
• The Currently Reading Podcast wherever you get your podcasts!
• View the list of all the books Meredith recommends in our Bookshop

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why is it so hard to get some kids to read—and is it even our job to make them love it?

We tackle the reality of raising reluctant readers in a world dominated by screens. From decoding disorders to disinterest, we break down the different reasons kids struggle with reading—and why understanding the “why” matters more than forcing the habit.

We share practical, judgment-free strategies to help kids engage with books and how parental expectations, school pressures, and comparison culture can complicate our relationship with reading.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Why kids become reluctant readers (and the different types)

• Supporting kids with learning differences like dyslexia
• Why forcing “worthy” books can backfire

• Letting go of the pressure to raise kids who love reading

Sign up for our newsletter here!

Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:

• Common Sense Media: Books for Reluctant Readers
• Amy Mascott for PBS Kids for Parents: What to Do When Your Child Hates Reading
• Susan Dominus for NYT: Motherhood, Screened Off
• Linda Flanagan for KQED: How Audiobooks Can Help Kids Who Struggle with Reading
• Mary Ann Scheuer’s Great Kid Books blog
• Campbell University: Alumni Experts: 6 Ways to Engage Reluctant Readers
• Scholastic Parents: The Five Finger Rule for Reading Will Help Your Child Find a 'Just-Right' Book
• Dawn Adkins for Providence Classical School blog: 10 Ways to Help Kids Choose Books Over Screens
• Jamie Martin for Understood.org: Do audiobooks get in the way of learning to read?

What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:

⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

What Fresh Hell podcast, mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, parenting reluctant readers, kids reading habits, how to get kids to read, children and screen time, reading motivation for kids, reluctant reader strategies, audiobooks for kids, graphic novels for children, parenting tips reading, literacy development children, encouraging kids to read, reading vs screens, family reading routines, struggling readers support, dyslexia and reading, independent reading skills, raising readers, reading comprehension kids, parenting challenges reading, kids and books

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices