Forrest and somatic therapist Elizabeth Ferreira explore a common source of relationship conflict: the mismatch between “fixing” (moving quickly into problem-solving) and “feeling” (wanting attunement and empathy before solutions). They talk about where these patterns come from, how each functions as a psychological defense, and the role of gender socialization, identity, and adaptation. The conversation also touches on trauma, nervous-system activation, and why building safety usually comes before real change.

Key Topics:

0:00: Intro

3:40: “Fixing” vs. “feeling,” and why both can be protective strategies.

6:03: Socialization and learned coping styles.

9:12: Why conflict happens

14:28: Attunement, then problem-solving.

18:35: How discomfort with emotion shapes communication

30:48: What change looks like in practice.

33:49: Trauma and nervous-system activation

42:32: Helping logical-first people open up emotionally.

46:49: “Do you want empathy or solutions?”

49:03: Teaser about Complex PTSD in relationships.

52:30: Recap

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Top performance coach and author Brad Stulberg joins Forrest to reframe and reclaim excellence. Brad explains how real excellence - involved engagement with something you care about - is the healthy middle path between over-the-top hustle-culture and detached nonchalance. They discuss the current culture of pseudo-excellence, the risks and rewards of caring deeply, how modern life can derail us, and how the real prize is the person you become while trying to reach your goals. Brad shares practical tools to build the habit of excellence: clear aims, micro-milestones, consistency over intensity, constraint-based discipline, and connection.

About our Guest: Brad is a regular contributor at the New York Times, the co-host of the Excellence, Actually podcast, and on faculty at the University of Michigan’s Graduate School of Public Health. He’s also the author of a number of books, including The Way of Excellence: A Guide to True Greatness and Deep Satisfaction in a Chaotic World.

Key Topics: 

0:00: Life feels better when we’re “trying well”

1:56: What does Brad mean by excellence?

3:42: What excellence is not

5:06: Staying on the path: how to keep going when results are slow

11:56: Excellence vs. skill

21:10: The Nonchalance Epidemic

27:29: Building your “identity house”

35:29: Specific tools for excellence

44:12: Excellence vs flow

50:10: Finding the enjoyable aspects of hard things

1:01:11: Gumption

1:03:57: “See the ball go through the net”

1:05:56: How to finish a process that never ends

1:13:22: Recap

Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.

Sponsors

Grab Huel today with my exclusive offer of 15% OFF online with my code BEINGWELL at huel.com/beingwell. New customers only. Thank you to Huel for partnering and supporting our show!

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Forrest and Dr. Rick explore how well-intentioned self-help advice can drift away from science under the incentives of the attention economy, where overclaiming, alarmist framing, and “this one simple trick” outperforms nuance. They talk about how authority gets manufactured, how the algorithm encourages overclaiming, and how “theories of everything” lead to misinformation. Dr. Rick and Forrest discuss whether seemingly harmless pseudoscientific practices can create a slippery slope, lowering the importance of material evidence and acting as an on-ramp to more consequential misinformation.

Key Topics: 

0:00 Introduction

2:00 The attention economy

9:00 The problems with clickbait

18:30: The risks of sprawling expertise

25:15: Modality capture: when all you have is a hammer

27:15: ADHD and trauma

39:24: If science changes, what can we trust?

42:30: How “fringe” can become mainstream

50:10: How do you decide who to trust?

1:06:00: The slippery slope of “woo”

1:11:35: What’s a better alternative?

1:21:11: Recap

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Dr. Rick and Forrest explore how we can put our key values into action in 2026. They discuss how we can identify authentic values, and then translate them into goals and daily behaviors while reducing our focus on outcomes we don’t control. Forrest focuses on insights from Self-Determination Theory, and Dr. Rick shares how to create a warmer inner climate, and they talk about the overall importance of self-belief. The episode includes a number of practical tools related to environment design, scheduling, social accountability, and how to overcome obstacles.

Key Topics: 

0:00: Introduction

2:00: What values are you focusing on this year?

8:50: Turning your values into plans

16:00: Motivation is “context dependent”

22:10: Claiming autonomy in an imperfect world

34:20: Turning ideas into specific behaviors

41:15: Updating self-concept

51:00: How to deal with normal obstacles

1:00:34: Recap

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In this New Year’s episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest make the case that most resolutions fail because they focus on the wrong things: outcomes and behaviors rather than key values. They explore how we can identify our important values, embrace caring about them, and start to let them change our behavior. Forrest talks about how we can differentiate authentic values from “conditions of worth,” and Dr. Rick shares a number of ways to get more in touch with what matters to you. Topics include translating “shoulds” into values, experiencing more autonomy and agency, creating personal narratives, and finding your “stance toward the year.”

Key Topics: 

0:00: Intro: values, self-concept, and levels of action

7:22: Living from states of having, doing, and being

13:09: Stances toward life based in threat versus opportunity; what are you paying attention to?

20:18: Examining “shoulds” to find and define your authentic values 

33:30: Emulating the people you admire and respect most

41:55: Strategies to identify your root values 

54:05: Recap

Rick's Goals Course: If you want to get more out of the year ahead check out Rick’s online course on resolutions that last. Learn more at RickHanson.com/goals, and use coupon code BeingWell25 to receive a 25% discount.

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Not caring - or nonchalance - is having a cultural moment. Nihilism is in, trying too hard is cringe, and the best way to cope with an often disappointing world is by not getting that invested. There’s just one problem: it’s hard to live a meaningful life without caring. In this episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick close 2025 by making the case for healthy caring: choosing objects of care wisely, prioritizing process over outcome, and cultivating equanimity without slipping into apathy. They do this by exploring four common obstacles that keep people from caring, sharing practical ways to work with each of them.

Key Topics: 

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Dr. Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag to answer listener questions about resentment, highly sensitive people, situationships, and expanding the window of tolerance. In the first three questions, they explore how resentment shows up across different relationships, including with coworkers, family members, and romantic partners. They discuss when to speak up, when to let go, and the underrated options in between. They then talk about agency, self awareness, and the expectations of others through two questions about highly sensitive people and building tolerance for discomfort. They close with a surprise bonus question for Forrest from Dr. Rick.

Key Topics: 

3:51: Question 1: When should I address resentment with coworkers?

15:46: Question 2: How to deal with resentful family members?

24:26: Question 3: Is my jealousy and resentment post-situationship valid?

34:23: Question 4: What are appropriate requests as a Highly Sensitive Person?

50:30: Question 5: How can I build the capacity to embrace discomfort?

56:14: BONUS BIRTHDAY QUESTION from Dr. Rick

1:00:00: Recap

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Listen to Turning Points: Navigating Mental Health wherever you get your podcasts. Follow the show so you never miss an episode. 

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Dr. Rick and Forrest explore one of the major topics in psychology today: the tension between "mainstream" and "alternative" approaches, and how to understand evidence-based care. Using the recent IFS controversy as a backdrop, they discuss what it means for an approach to be evidence-based, the real-world dangers of inflated claims, and therapy’s complex relationship with the medical model. They get into the weeds on study design, effect sizes, insurance, why different approaches may or may not have a large body of evidence, and how to think about the research on “common factors” in therapy. Dr. Rick and Forrest offer a simple framework for making good decisions amidst all of this complexity.

Key Topics: 

0:00: Introduction: the IFS article

7:27: Psychotherapy as medicine vs. personal growth practices

15:31: “Don’t know” mind versus “durrr who knows?” mind

19:50: What counts as evidence?

29:58: What does it mean for a therapy to be evidence-based?

42:38: How do we know therapy works?

53:45: Getting on your own team

59:07: Complexities with the medical model

1:10:24: How insurance and the healthcare system complicate the picture

1:18:27: Dr. Rick’s top two takeaways

1:29:05: Recap

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Forrest is joined by psychiatrist Dr. Blaise Aguirre to discuss Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT). They explore how extreme emotional sensitivity can lead to despair, self-hatred, suicidality, and an intense fear of abandonment, and how DBT can teach the skills needed to regulate those feelings. They discuss the nature of self-hatred, how to change the stories you’ve told about yourself, and how their insight and empathy can make people with BPD some of his favorite clients to work with.

About our Guest: Dr. Blaise Aguirre is the medical director of 3East at McLean Hospital, a residential DBT program for adolescents and young adults, and is an assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. He’s also the co-author of a number of books including DBT for Dummies, and the author of I Hate Myself: Overcome Self-Loathing and Realize Why You're Wrong About You.

Key Topics: 

0:00: Introduction

4:05: Common features of BPD

15:16: Skill-building versus narrative work in therapy

22:10: What DBT looks like in practice

27:02: DBT skills: mindfulness, dialectic thinking, and opposite action

33:43: How to shift self-hatred

49:22: Stigmatization of BPD

53:25: BPD versus CPTSD

58:52: Recap

Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.

Sponsors

Listen to Turning Points: Navigating Mental Health wherever you get your podcasts. Follow the show so you never miss an episode. 

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Dr. Rick and Forrest explore toxic relationships, focusing on how to identify and exit them. Rick talks about how positive traits like empathy, loyalty, and a sense of duty can keep us stuck. They then discuss common relationship red flags like lovebombing, cycles of idealization and devaluation, power imbalances, and what Forrest calls “the fuzz.” Finally, they talk about how people can increase their chances of a healthy exit. Other topics include developing self-trust, trauma-bonding, shame, and avoiding the cycle of “maybe next time they’ll…”

Key Topics: 

0:00: Introduction

3:05: Why do good people stay in bad relationships?

10:02: Relationship red flags: the dark triad, devaluation, lovebombing, and the fuzz

24:17: How this shows up in Dr. Rick’s practice

39:48: How to get out: building self-trust, increasing your options, and duty to yourself

1:12:33: Recap

Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.

Sponsors

Listen to Turning Points: Navigating Mental Health wherever you get your podcasts. Follow the show so you never miss an episode. 

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Dr. Becky Kennedy joins Forrest for a conversation about building better relationships, with ourselves, our partners, and our children. They talk about Dr. Becky’s framework of “good inside,” and how we can apply it to ourselves. Dr. Becky explains how many of the struggles parents face trace back to their own childhood experiences, and suggests how we can reparent ourselves by learning emotional regulation, working with shame, and becoming sturdier. They also cover the limits of behavioral control models, deeply feeling kids, maintaining boundaries when things get hard, and building connection capital.

About our Guest: Dr. Becky is a clinical psychologist, founder of Good Inside, and author of the book by the same name. She has over 4 million social media followers, and is one of the most influential people in the world of parenting today.

Key Topics: 

0:00: Intro

1:51: Self-development and individual agency in parenting

7:37: Dr. Becky’s process for addressing problematic behaviors

12:48: Parenting as an opportunity for personal growth

16:26: Becoming “sturdy”

19:13: Two jobs of a parent: boundaries and empathy

28:29: Reparenting ourselves

38:40: Shame and deeply feeling kids

44:39: Building connection capital

50:06: Resilience over happiness

57:28: Does parenting content increase parental anxiety? 

1:02:30: How to grow as a parent without shame or self-blame

1:07:06: Repair in relationships

1:13:27: Gentle parenting vs sturdy parenting

1:18:33: Recap

Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.

Sponsors

Listen to Turning Points: Navigating Mental Health wherever you get your podcasts. Follow the show so you never miss an episode. 

Level up your bedding with Quince. Go to Quince.com/BEINGWELL for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.

If you are exploring whether you might be neurodivergent, check out Hyperfocus with Rae Jacobson. 

Skylight is offering our listeners $20 off their 10 inch Skylight Frame by going to myskylight.com/BEINGWELL.

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