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Java with Juli

Java with Juli

Dr. Juli Slattery and Authentic Intimacy®

An Outreach of Authentic Intimacy®

  • 41 minutes 10 seconds
    What if I'm Attracted to Someone Who Isn't My Spouse? #606

    This week, Juli sits down with Joe and Hannah to tackle the question: What do you do when you're attracted to someone who isn't your spouse?

    Together, they unpack the reality that attraction outside of marriage isn't a matter of if, but when. From the myth of "soulmates" to the powerful role of brain chemistry, this conversation explores why these feelings happen, and why they don't have to define your choices.

    You'll also learn how small decisions, honesty, and intentional investment in your marriage can protect what matters most.

    Co-hosts: Hannah Nitz and Joe Caruso

    Check out our newest Hot Topic Kit: Building a Great Sex Life

    Tell us what you think! Leave us a rating and review.

    Follow-up Resources:

    Preorder 25 Questions You're Afraid to Ask About Sex, Love, and Intimacy by Dr. Juli Slattery

    Be the first to know when Online Book Studies open up

    Sexual Attraction Isn't As Important as You Think, Here's Why by Juli Slattery (blog)

    Follow Joe Caruso at @joecaruso06

    Follow Hannah Nitz at @hannahnitz

    Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

    4 May 2026, 7:00 am
  • 43 minutes 38 seconds
    Can I Still Be Loved? Faith, STIs, and the Journey Out of Shame, #605

    Shame has a way of convincing us to hide. But Jesus doesn't turn away from your shame. He steps toward it.

    This week, Juli sits down with Dr. Carol Tanksley and Allie Mazur to shed light on the often unspoken reality of living with an STI. Together, they unpack the weight of shame, the fear of rejection, and the questions that can follow a diagnosis like herpes.

    You'll be reminded that while consequences of sin may linger, they don't have the final word. Jesus meets us right in the middle of our brokenness, offering freedom, healing, and hope.

    If you've ever felt like your story is "too much" or "too broken," this conversation is for you.

    Guests: Dr. Carol Tanksley, OBGYN and Allie Mazur

    Follow-Up Resources:

    Q&A: Are sexual sin and sexual brokenness the same thing? (video)

    Q&A: Where do I begin healing? (video)

    How to Get Past Shame from Sexual Sin by Juli Slattery (blog)

    Dr. Carol Tanksley's website: drcarolministries.com

    Follow Dr. Carol at @drcarolt

    Allie Mazur's website: livebeyondherpes.com

    Follow Allie Mazur at @allie_beyond

    Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

    27 April 2026, 7:00 am
  • 30 minutes 55 seconds
    How Do You Keep Married Sex Exciting?, #604

    Married sex doesn't just "stay hot"...but you can fan the flames to create something even more meaningful (and longer-lasting) than honeymoon sex.

    This week, we're talking about how to keep married sex exciting over the long haul. You'll learn about the shift that happens in long-term relationships, why desire can fade into routine, and what actually helps bring the spark back.

    No theory. No pressure. Just real-life rhythms and practical ways you can reconnect emotionally and physically with your spouse. If you've ever thought "we're good... but it's not like it used to be," this conversation is for you!

    Co-host: Hannah Nitz

    What did you think of this conversation? We'd love to hear from you! Leave us a comment and review.

    Follow-up Resources:

    Preorder 25 Questions You're Afraid to Ask About Sex, Love, and Intimacy by Dr. Juli Slattery

    Be the first to know when Online Book Studies open up

    Join Dr. Jennifer Degler's Dare of the Month email list.

    Follow Hannah Nitz @hannahnitz

    Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

    20 April 2026, 7:00 am
  • 41 minutes 31 seconds
    5 Ways To Navigate Differences & Build a Stronger Marriage, #603

    One of you is ready to leave early. The other is still looking for their shoes. Welcome to marriage.

    This week, Juli and Mike are on stage at the Love Like You Mean It Cruise! Live and unfiltered, they talk honestly about how their differences have shown up in parenting, intimacy, and their pace of life—and how they've learned to let those differences draw them closer, instead of driving them apart.

    Guest: Mike Slattery

    Join Mike & Juli on the Love Like You Mean It Cruise in 2027!

    Follow-up Resources:

    3 Reasons Women Tend to Take Over in Marriage by Juli Slattery (blog)

    Q&A: How can I help my husband grow up and take responsibility? (video)

    The Very Important Difference Between Conflict & Fighting by Juli Slattery (blog)

    13 April 2026, 7:00 am
  • 40 minutes 45 seconds
    Why Sexual Trauma Hurts Us So Deeply (& What Healing Looks Like), #602

    Some wounds don't just live in your memories… they live in your body, in your relationships, and in your sense of safety.

    If you've ever wondered, "Can I be whole after sexual trauma?," you're not alone—and you're not beyond healing.

    That's the question Juli is tackling this week. You'll hear why sexual trauma uniquely affects identity and intimacy, how shame and self-blame keep us stuck, and what real sexual wholeness looks like.

    This conversation is for anyone who has experienced sexual trauma (or loves someone who has) and is wondering: Is healing really possible for me?

    Co-host: Hannah Nitz

    Register for the webinar Healing After Sexual Abuse: Practical Guidance for Pastors, Leaders, and Caregivers.

    Follow-up resources:

    Find a Christian counselor or sex therapist: check out ABCST or MyCounselor.online

    Surprised By the Healer by Juli Slattery and Linda Dillow

    The Wounded Heart by Dan Allender

    Try Softer by Aundi Kolber

    God's Healing Stinks by Juli Slattery (blog)

    Q&A: Past sexual trauma inhibits my ability to enjoy sex. Is there hope that I can ever heal? with Dr. Juli Slattery

    Follow Hannah Nitz @hannahnitz

    Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

    6 April 2026, 7:00 am
  • 55 minutes 27 seconds
    How To Date Well Without Losing Your Faith (Or Your Heart), #601

    Their love story made headlines—but not for the reasons you might expect.

    In this conversation, CD and Melody Fabien share a completely different vision for dating—one rooted in purpose, boundaries, and hearing God's voice.

    If you're tired of hook-ups, ghosting, and the pressure of fast-paced dating, this episode is for you.

    Guest: CD & Melody Fabien

    Check out our brand-new Hot Topic Kit: Healthy Dating & Boundaries.

    Follow-up Resources:

    Check out CD & Melody's resources at https://cdandmelody.com/

    Watch their news-worthy first kiss.

    Q&A: What's the Difference Between Sexual Integrity and Purity? (video)

    Q&A: How Can I Steward My Sexuality As a Single? (video)

    What Do I Do With My Sexual Desires? by Juli Slattery (blog)

    Follow Melody on IG at @melodyfabien

    Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

    30 March 2026, 7:00 am
  • 35 minutes 34 seconds
    Why Sex Feels Hard (& How to Make it Amazing Again), #600

    Many married couples carry a secret: one of them doesn't like sex—they may even dread it. For years, sex has felt more like obligation than pleasure, and they've quietly believed something must be wrong with them.

    This week, we're tackling the unspoken question: "What if I'm married and I don't like sex?"

    We'll talk about the real reasons sex can feel difficult or even painful, and call out a few common lies that keep couples stuck.

    If you've ever felt confused, disappointed, or alone in your struggles with sex, this conversation offers hope, practical insight, and the reminder you don't have to stay where you are.

    Co-host: Hannah Nitz

    We'd love to hear your thoughts about this conversation. Leave us a rating and review.

    Follow-up Resources:

    Be the first to know when Online Book Studies open up

    Q&A: Past sexual trauma inhibits my ability to enjoy sex. Is there hope that I can heal? (video)

    Q&A: Sex has never been pleasurable in our marriage. Should I fake it? (video)

    Preorder 25 Questions You're Afraid to Ask About Sex, Love, and Intimacy by Dr. Juli Slattery

    God, Sex & Your Marriage by Juli Slattery

    Passion Pursuit: What Kind of Love Are You Making? by Juli Slattery

    Restoring the Pleasure by Cliff & Joyce Penner

    Enjoy! The Gift of Sexual Pleasure for Women by Cliff & Joyce Penner

    Follow Hannah Nitz @hannahnitz

    Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

    23 March 2026, 7:00 am
  • 33 minutes 31 seconds
    Marriage in Survival Mode: Why Dates Still Matter, #194

    Life gets busy—especially with kids, work, and everyday stress. But research shows that couples who consistently make time for each other are significantly happier in their marriages.

    This week, we're talking about why date nights matter more than you think. We'll tackle common obstacles couples face, like exhaustion, busy schedules, lack of childcare, and awkward conversations. Plus, you'll hear simple and practical tips to help you reconnect with your spouse—even in the busiest of seasons.

    Guests: Dr. Greg & Erin Smalley

    Check out our newest Hot Topic Kit: Healthy Dating & Boundaries.

    Follow-up Resources:

    Take the Date Night Challenge: 52 Creative Ideas to Make Your Marriage Fun by Greg & Erin Smalley

    Date Night Conversation Starters from Greg & Erin Smalley

    Q&A: How often is "normal" for having sex in marriage? (video)

    16 March 2026, 7:00 am
  • 36 minutes 39 seconds
    The 5 Love Languages (& Why Your Spouse's Love Tank Is Still Empty), #599

    You know your spouse's love language, and you try to use it. So why is their love tank always running on empty?

    This week, we're expanding the classic framework to include personality nuances, seasonal shifts, overdoing it (yes, that's possible!), and love tank "leaks." Plus, you'll learn why gifts aren't always about money and why physical touch isn't always about sex.

    Join us for a conversation about moving past formulas and becoming a better student of the one you love.

    Guests: Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott

    Follow-up Resources:

    Listen to Dr. Gary Chapman talk about the Five Love Languages on Java #592 The Love Language that Matters Most.

    Take the free relationship assessment at myheartchart.com

    The Five Love Languages Premium Assessment

    The Love Language That Matters Most by Dr. Gary Chapman, Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott

    Follow Les & Leslie at @lesandleslie

    Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

    9 March 2026, 8:00 am
  • 40 minutes 24 seconds
    Does God Really Care if We Move in Together?, #598

    Maybe you're already living together. Maybe this topic feels uncomfortable. Maybe you've never questioned it before.

    This week, Juli unpacks what God says about living together before marriage, what (secular) research is telling us, and how covenant—not convenience—creates lasting security.

    Co-hosts: Hannah Nitz & Joe Caruso

    Tell us what you think! Leave us a rating & review.

    Follow-Up Resources:

    Preorder 25 Questions You're Afraid to Ask About Sex, Love, and Intimacy by Dr. Juli Slattery

    Q&A: Is God okay with me having sex with someone I love even if we're not married?

    Q&A: What is the difference between sexual integrity and purity?

    Follow Hannah Nitz @hannahnitz

    Follow Joe Caruso at @joecaruso06

    Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

    2 March 2026, 8:00 am
  • 40 minutes 12 seconds
    Cultivating Courage: Why Men Need a New Vision for Manhood, #597

    Men get a lot of mixed messages about masculinity. Some say it's toxic. Others say it doesn't really matter anymore. It's no surprise guys are left wondering, "What does it even mean to be a good man?"

    This week, Juli sits down with Brant Hansen, author of The Men We Need, to get honest about the struggles men face and why true strength looks very different from the stereotypes we're used to. This conversation is an invitation to see manhood not as a problem to fix, but as a calling worth stepping into.

    Guest: Brant Hansen

    What did you think about this conversation? Let us know in a rating and review.

    Follow-up Resources:

    The Men We Need:God's Purpose for the Manly Man, the Avid Indoorsman, or Any Man Willing to Show Up by Brant Hansen

    Blog: 3 Reasons Women Tend To Take Over in Marriage by Dr. Juli Slattery

    Blog: 7 Ways We Unknowingly Sabotage Intimacy in Our Marriages by Dr. Juli Slattery

    Blog: Resign As Boss: How To Help Your Husband Lead by Dr. Juli Slattery

    Video: Q&A: How Can I Help My Husband Grow Up and Take Responsibility?

    Follow Brant Hansen at @branthansen

    Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

    23 February 2026, 8:00 am
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