Alice and Martha follow Harry and Dumbledore into a world entirely their own, as Dunderbore - sorry, Dumberton, meets young Tom Riddle for the first time.
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29 June 2026, 3:00 am
1 hour 42 minutes
Take Five, Take 6.4: Half-Blood Prince, 15:00-20:00
Alice and Martha are once again joined by special guest Shut Up Tim to discuss the next five minutes of Half-Blood Prince. Bellatrix and her real weird Cissy head to Spinner's End to make the Unbreakable Vow, Snape enjoys the summer by connecting with his Muggle roots, and Harry gets a taste of the Weasleys' Wonder Emporium.
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New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don’t forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!
22 June 2026, 3:00 am
1 hour 36 minutes
Take Five, Take 6.3: Half-Blood Prince, 10:00-15:00
A little less Michael Gambon and a little more Hedwig makes for a slightly better five minutes for Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim to discuss this week! Harry makes his way to the Burrow, via side-along (?) apparition. You'd think Mrs. Weasley would know if Harry Potter was in her house, and you'd also think maybe she wouldn't encourage the kids to light random newspapers on fire in the house..
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New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don’t forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!
15 June 2026, 3:00 am
54 minutes 24 seconds
One Page at at Time: Book 3, Page 371
Sirius dusts off his voice on this week's episode, as Alice and Martha enter the Shrieking Shack (mansion?) to hear all about how Sirius survived and escaped the very realistic Azkaban prison. Plus, Hermione manages not to be annoying, and Lupin enters teacher mode with some excellent classroom management skills.
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8 June 2026, 3:00 am
1 hour 27 minutes
Take Five, Take 6.2: Half-Blood Prince, 05:00-10:00
Alice, Martha, and SPECIAL GUEST Shut Up Tim discuss the second five minutes of Half-Blood Prince, which sees Harry taking Dumbledore's arm off to Budleigh Babberton, Dumbledore channeling his inner Sanguini, and David Yates quickly turning into David Yikes.
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New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don’t forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!
1 June 2026, 3:00 am
56 minutes 12 seconds
One Page at at Time: Book 1, Page 8
How very right Alice and Martha were about the first single-digit One Page at a Time! "Jim Dale" gets to do the full narration this week, as Mr. Dursley drifts into an uneasy sleep and the cat on the wall doesn't move an inch (wow!). Dumbledore stomps down the Privet Drive runway, and while we're at it, we may as well do a deep dive into the origins of the street's name!
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25 May 2026, 4:47 am
54 minutes 57 seconds
One Page at at Time: Book 2, Page 135
Nearly Headless Nick has his 500th Deathday Party upstaged by not only the Headless Hunt, but Myrtle and Peeves as well on this week's One Page at a Time! Find out whether or not Jacob's sibling is a ghost, whether or not Mary would be capable of drawing flying moldy peanuts, and which memes fit perfectly with this week's page!
Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don’t forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!
18 May 2026, 3:00 am
58 minutes 20 seconds
One Page at at Time: Book 5, Page 602
Firenze comes galloping in to save Divination! Alice and Martha discuss his CGI movie portrayal, the likelihood of teenagers swooning over a centaur, and an "I love magic!" moment on this week's One Page at a Time.
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11 May 2026, 3:05 am
59 minutes 9 seconds
One Page at at Time: Book 4, Page 399
Did a veela send a blast out into the universe? Alice and Martha make some confident (not necessarily correct) assertions about the movie, forget to give a moral of the week, and test out lots of character impressions on this week's One Page at a Time!
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4 May 2026, 3:00 am
59 minutes 6 seconds
One Page at at Time: Book 6, Page 559
Alice and Martha break down the most fun and hilarious page yet! Dumbledore senses traces of magic in a very mysterious manner, Harry brags about his fitness and his youth, and Voldemort once again fails to realize that physical pain is not the worst thing in the world.
Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don’t forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!
27 April 2026, 3:00 am
1 hour 25 seconds
One Page at at Time: Book 1, Page 36
Alice and Martha discuss the Dursleys' initial reactions to his first Hogwarts letter and dive into some interesting canonical lore that may or may not actually explain who is responsible for sending the letters. Hopefully you don't have to silently fight Dudley for a chance to listen at the keyhole to this episode!
Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don’t forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!